How to make this the last time and finally lose weight?!

[Gemi33]

Hi All

I have tried to lose weight and failed so many times. I have tried so may different approaches and for whatever reason every time I can't stick with it or I sabotage myself. I am now the heaviest I have ever been and feel miserable. I feel like I am always saying I will start tomorrow and then it all falls apart. I really want to do this but feel so unmotivated because I just can't seem to do it. I feel unhealthy, exhausted and I can't seem to get out of this rut.

I need to get organised and get out of this rut I think rather than rush into a new 'diet' and then give up just as quickly. So I've decided to use this week to get organised and get my head in the right place to hopefully give me the best chances of success, So -

What are your tips for making a positive start to weightloss?

Does anyone have any ideas/tips for how they can get their head in the right place and get motivated?

I don't actually know what diet or approach to follow this time as I feel like I've gone through them all! What is working or has worked for you?

Any recommendations for websites / books / youtube videos / podcasts that you have found inspiring, encouraging or supportive?

I really have had enough of feeling like this and would welcome any ideas.

xx

I'm fed up of starting again and just ending up bigger than I was by trying to do too much too quickly and crashing out. Instead I've decided to take a year and lose 3lbs a month, so a lb each week and one week a month where it goes a bit wrong!

Over the year I'm going to lose 2.5st and hopefully be able to maintain it by not trying to lose too quickly.

I suggest calorie counting and a lifestyle change as apposed to 'dieting'. It has to be sustainable. I use the Nutracheck app, I was 11 stone at the beginning of 2019 with a BMI of 28.4 (verging into the red zone). I now have a healthy BMI of around 21, feel great and am maintaining a weight of just over 8 stone. My target weight was 8st 10lb but I easily surpassed this. Slow and steady wins the race, I still eat what I like within my allowance, rarely exercise although I may start to now. Good luck - you can do it.

Thank you for your replies.

muddledmidget that's how I feel, like I'm constantly starting again but now I'm heavier than ever.

I think I'm struggling because despite the fact I really want to lose weight I just seem to have no motivation. In the past when I have been successful at losing weight I have been really positive about it and focused and I just don't feel like that now (probably because I'm burnt out with constantly thinking and worrying about it), I really want to get my head in the right place but I don't know how.

I know slow and steady is the way to go but because I have so much to lose now I find that really hard.

xx

Definitely calorie count but don't use the rubbish calories the likes of MFP reccomend. Use a TDEE calculator to work out how much calories you naturally use in a day and then drop them by around 500 or so a day. I follow Team RH Fitness and they set my caloried and macro goals and I'm losing consistently without ever feeling hungry

Comment so I can return when I have time to write

Log calorie intake and activity with an app (I use FitBit & would recommend it, very quick and easy). If you have a plateau it then is easy to tweak and work out where the problem lies. For example I started to plateau and I realised I was severely underestimating the amount of cream I put in my coffee so decided to alter that and add in a walk as well as my usual run. Then I started to see results again.

I'm having some success by doing 16:8 and cutting out pretty much all alcohol. Don't miss breakfast at all so this will be sustainable long term. Actually, miss the wine much less than I thought I would too , which is good for both weight loss and general health.

I need to up the exercise , although I don't thnk exercise helps with weight loss anywhere near as much as diet.

Why is it so hard? Food haunts me

If I also have a fear of looking even older when I’ve lost the four stone that needs to go ... !

@Gemi33

How much have you got to lose? I agree it becomes overwhelming

My husband is very sporty and fit and it just makes me feel even worse about myself

I could have written your post. I am going to see a hypnotist this week. Fingers crossed for a miracle.

In the past I have done best with: calorie counting, SlimmingWorld and the no S diet. Everything works if you stick to it. The No S diet get easier as it goes along and doesn’t require high levels of concentration. SlimmingWorld has the accountability side and they have opened groups again now I believe.

Good luck

Use the Hawthorne effect. Monitor all consumption and activity without the goal of changing what you eat or do. Don’t do anything else.
Especially don’t do any of the things that haven’t worked before.

Oh and as far as appetite goes I would say I find fat (especially saturated fat) very satiating and sugar (+ simple carbs) the opposite. So if I find I am getting hungry between meals I look to see if I need to reduce sugar/simple carbs and I don't do low fat products. Hence the cream in the coffee as per an earlier post, it did really fill me up. However too much fat will impact on a calorie count so you need to make sure you are burning the extra energy.

Thanks so much for all the ideas!

KrabbyPatties I have about 5 stone to lose :( Your comment about aging struck me - while I'm not worried about that specifically I do have other issues with my body (don't really want to say..) that I think sometimes get in the way - I sometimes think what's the point in working so hard to lose all that weight and still looking horrible or even worse anyway because of that (not sure that makes sense but I know what I mean!).

xx

I think to lose weight and sustain that loss you need to address the reasons why you eat the way you do. Be that physical, mental, educational, habit, whatever. Until you fix the underlying problem it will always be a battle for you.

I used healthyweightstrategies.com and it is really good for sustainable weight loss. It deffo isn't a quick fix but helps you understand why you aren't losing the weight and helped me to change habits over time. I haven't regained any of the weight so far.

Thanks for the replies - I think I'm very much an emotional eater and I find that really difficult. I live alone and am in a job that is very stressful and I end up seeking comfort in food I suppose.

xx

I'm slim and here is what works for me:

Hot water and lemon every morning before eating anything.
Small / medium bowl of healthy cereal e.g fruit and fibre, a slice of toast and a piece of fruit.
Dinner something healthy e.g. sandwich, cheesy pasta and veg or jacket potato.
Tea anything really, examples include veggie chilli con carne, veggie sausages with home-made wedges and veg, stir fry.
Peppermint tea before bed and tea / water throughout day. No snacks usually but sometimes snack on fruit / nuts.

I do drink tea but loads of water which I think is key. I drink zero alcohol and have a once a week treat from the bakery e.g doughnut (as well as binge eat chocolate and biscuits on first 2 days of my period!) so it's everything in moderation imo.

I disagree with the calorie counting approach, just sounds like a faff and unsustainable for life. If I'm eating out (which isn't often) I just eat whatever. I'm vegetarian which I feel helps and I run twice a week.

I know running probably feels out of reach right now but another thing I do is walk everywhere. Walking is a great exercise and I'd really recommend it. I only ever drive if wherever we are going is more than an hour's walk each way. Rather than driving to the supermarket I do it all on foot but 3 times a week to make it manageable. I'd highly recommend walking!

Good luck