Comfort eating. Please help :(

[Lily2811]

I'm stuck in a horrendous comfort eating cycle where I eat because I'm sat and then it makes me feel even worse so I eat to try and "treat" myself and then feel guilty. I just seem to be going round and round like this. Tonight is a classic example. I felt fat, ugly, sad and lonely so I ordered a Chinese. Now feel so guilty, a bit sick and back to square one. Please help :( I am a classic comfort eater, eating when sad, stressed, worried, angry, upset. You name it. Please be kind, I feel bad enough already.

I think you need to retrain your brain, and the method I suggest is one that is helpful when dealing with anxiety. Actually, what you're contending with is very similar to/ if not actually like anxiety. You start to feel bad, you naturally want to feel better. So you eat. The good feeling is very fleeting and the bad feelings start all over again, trapping you in this vicious circle.

You need to actively distract yourself, just like I did when I was dealing with anxiety due to peri-menopause. Instead of just sitting there, letting your feelings ruminate, you MUST get up and physically distract yourself. Clean a drawer. Clean the kitchen. Go for a walk. Clean the bathroom. Whatever it takes to get over the hump of wanting to fill your face with food, because those negative feelings will pass. It takes discipline and a real commitment to change, but you CAN do this. A constant awareness that no food will ever fill your emotional needs helps too. I truly believe you can conquer this.

I found painting my nails a really good way to treat myself at home without turning to food. It took time, but I could still do it in front of the TV and I felt better about myself having nice nails. Gave me something to do with my hands and when the polish is drying you actually can't reach for snacks (my downfall). I know it doesn't get to the root issue, but could be good to try as a distraction.

What @wingingitsince2018 wrote is exactly what I was trying to get across. Doing something physical, whatever it is, is crucial. It reroutes your thinking, forcing your brain to stop obsessing about food.

I don't have any words of wisdom as I'm the same. I'm a bringer-binge when happy, sad, stressed, angry.

The only thing that curbs the binges is low carb, because I know the food I can eat is not the food that would give me the satisfaction I seek when I binge. I have to completely cut out sugar and try and find something to replace the binging when I do have those moments of stress.

Low carb high fat here too. Was (am?) a big comfort eater. Have now discovered low carb comfort foods so I’m happy. But the nature of low carb high fat is that you do lose a lot of the emotional attachment to food
I’ve lost 2st 4 and I now can enjoy 90-85% chocolate sometimes but I feel in control about it

@Siameasy can you give examples of low carb high fat foods that you eat.

Well for instance I would mash cauliflower with garlic butter or Boursin in lieu of mashed potato. So the thing with HFLC is that you add fat to your low carb veg which really improves the veg be it olive oil on rocket leaves or bacon fat on Brussels Sprouts.
There is a list of allowed veg on Low Carb Bootcamp. I’ve discovered you can roast celeriac and also kale.

Keep your hands busy - don’t just ‘sit’. Find something creative to do - knitting, sketching, colouring - or something entertaining (even if it’s candy crush!) - if your hands and mind are busy you can’t snack.

Hey

I would try and look at firstly fix what is making you so anxious and depressed which then causes the emotional eating response. You need to boost your self confidence and love for your body NOW. Self hatred dieting never ever works, I promise. Its much easier to want to mae changes to your body because you love it rather than hate it.

Sorry to hear you feel so bad OP- i was a size22 after youngest DC born&also trapped in a cycle of feeling like shit(isolated out in Oz in abusive relationship)eating&binge watching shows as the only place i didnt feel judged&just loved to eat-ice cream,cake,hash browns&huge serves of lasagne..I started by being active at night so no-one could see that sweaty mess i was in&it helped me by reducing plate/portion size..when i kicked exP out everything got easier😂but its only been the past couple of years&going low carb that ive really got a handle on cravings for food..Be a kind friend to yourself and know you can do this😊

A book that helped me is called Brain Over Binge.

aw. am sending you a hug. (If you don't want it, pass it on to somebody who looks like they need it).

some great advice already given about distracting yourself: nail painting, cleaning out a drawer: all good, healthy distractions. A nice bath, a pedicure, something self-cherishing that doesn't involve food.

I’m the same. I’m also prone to comfort eating when down/sad/angry/hormonal etc but also when celebrating and really happy. Any occasion really!

Didn’t work for me but have you read/thought about the binge and deprivation cycle? The thinking is that if you restrict yourself that will lead to a blow out and binging but if you tell yourself you can have stuff you don’t feel that compulsion to over eat. I think it’s very sound but I found that I still just over did it. I love/loved the feeling that eating certain foods give/gave me.

Like others on here the only thing that has worked for me so far is restricting carbs, Thats the only way I can be free of being of control.

I started on BIWI’s low carb bootcamp on here and then read up more about keto and low carb high fat in general.

It’s so weird but it turns out that it’s only carbs that have that hold on me and emotional link.

Good luck and be kind to yourself x