Help me choose a way to lose weight please!

[BamburyFuriou3]

I'm a 40+ year old SAHM with a breastfed baby who also wakes up all bloody night (plus other kids).
I have a history of eating disorders, so I'm avoiding very low carb ( I have reduced carb intake though)
I am starting to exercise again after many years but can only get out for 20 minutes 2 or 3 times a week so I've taken up jogging.

I want to lose one stone - I'm 5"5.5 and 10 stone 7. I did go up to almost 12 stone post pregnancy due to constantly eating as a way to combat sleep deprivation and awful breastfeeding induced hunger.
My waist is 33 inches so I worry about abdominal fat.
I've managed to lose 1.5 stone just by cutting the crap out and drastically reducing portion size, but I'm stuck and haven't lost weight for weeks!

Currently I eat:
Breakfast - 2x dessert spoons of oats, 1 X dessert spoon of chia, small handful of nuts or seeds, some raisins and oat milk. Pint of tea with oat milk.
Mid morning cup of tea with oat milk. Maybe some nuts or apple slices
Lunch - salad with a bit of mayo but mainly green stuff piled high, with a boiled egg or chicken breast or hummus. Half a thick cut home made slice of bread.
Afternoon cup of tea with oat milk
Dinner - I eat from a small breakfast bowl to cut portions and at least half fillit with veg, then a handful of carb (rice or pasta), a protein, and s dessert spoon of whatever sauce.
Supper is a treat - cup of tea and s small biscuit. If I'm really hungry I also have a spoonful of peanut butter.

I allow myself a bit of chocolate a t the weekend (maybe 4-5 squares) and very occasionally a half glass of wine or cider.

What am I doing wrong? I'm scared if I cut down further I might be risking anorexic behaviour again..

I don't think you're doing anything wrong, sounds great and v disciplined. You've done brilliantly to lose 1.5 stone. You don't say how old your baby is - I know that my body refused to lose weight at a certain point while breastfeeding, like it was protecting its supply. But if I assume that's not the case for you, a few thoughts. Do you use mfp to track your calories or would that trigger eating disorder do you think? If you're maintaining, you're eating what you burn. One thought would be you might be overdoing the nuts/seeds, they can be mad calories for not much volume. Are you drinking plenty of water? I hear you on not cutting carbs, I follow Team RH on FB, it's a private coaching group (there is a cost but I think it's worth it) and one big thing is not to cut out carbs, you need them for energy and they're not the enemy.
Don't be too hard on yourself either, I'd say looking at your height you're a healthy weight and you've a little one you're feeding. Time passes, if it takes a while so be it, 1 inch over the healthy waistline can be dealt with over time. Best of luck

I lost weight initially with breast feeding and running, but the last half a stone didn't go until I stopped breast feeding. I didn't change anything else and it literally dropped off me in a couple of weeks. I think your body hangs on to some fat for reserves. The exact same thing happened after I had my second child too.

I agree with PP that the last bit of weight just holds on when you are bf. Mine went about 6 months after I stopped (with work, however). Your diet sounds great 👍

You've done marvellously! Well done.

BUT cut back on the nuts/seeds, for me they are hidden calories. I was shocked just how many calories were in my handful of nut/seeds.
I echo using a tracker like myfitnespal, it keeps me focused, especially when I need an extra handful of nuts!

Personally I wouldn't advise using mfp or calorie counting if you feel you are at risk from an eating disorder. I know it would be the worst thing ever for me, I'd get obsessed with calories.

Your diet looks fine to me, I'm no expert though. The only changes I'd make would be add more protein to lunch and take out the bread, maybe try eggs in some form for breakfast sometimes as a bit of variety?

I'm bf at the mo and nearly 40. I've managed to lose most of my baby weight, but I'm struggling to get the last bit off. I remember it took a while when I had the first and I lost a bit more when I stopped bf.

You don't sound OW to me esp. if you're BF. I would say to look at your tea intake ,maybe have mint green tea or ginger tea sometimes instead.

Plus drink filtered water a lot too of course.

Thanks for the replies

I am fat. With a 33" inch waist I'm not imagining it either! It's all on my tummy.
DS is 12 months but still breastfeeds loads - and if I go without food eg skip breakfast, I do get all shaky and faint - I don't want to risk my supply either (I do natural term breastfeeding)
As a pp said I would find calorie counting a bit triggering so won't be doing that, bit otherwise yes I would.

Agreed - the nuts and seeds and lots of tea a probably a huge proportion of my calories so can cut down a bit there. Will try that thanks. And yes I drink loads of water - get so thirsty breastfeeding!

Bambury A lot of people would KILL for waist of 33inches!!! I know that isn't helpful to you though!

I do know a great, easy, exercise for flattening a tummy and shaping abs in you're interested.

You are not eating much already so I would aim to just reduce a little bit on your food or you will be eating nothing! Up your activity a little bit, moving more during the day and maybe some exercise at home. Aim to lose the weight slowly while you tone up and get fit.

I think I'm in trouble - I'm finding it difficult to justify any food at all now.

We are camping and today I have had:
One cup of tea with almond milk
One dessert spoon of peanut butter
One apple
Half a banana. And the banana was a struggle but I know I needed to eat something as I was feeling faint.

Yesterday I had 3 mugs of tea
One apple
Half a banana
Some cucumber
Quarter of a wrap with peanut butter
Quarter of a chicken breast with broccoli and some carrot slices (3 I think).

• that's too little isn't it?

And by Sunday I was 10 stone 2

I reckon that Paul Mackenna could help you get your mind around eating correctly. His book "I Can Make You Thin" Can also help you put ON a little weight healthily. So you eat slowly , enjoying the food and stop when you feel full. Only eat when you feel hungry. Tea isn't a meal of course!

I actually think (and I mean this kindly) that as you know you are at risk of an ED you need to go about this very carefully. You're already not eating too much and you seem very controlling about your intake/choices though they are healthy. If you're starting to feel faint etc then you aren't eating enough which is no good for you, your BF or your baby. You need to be strong and healthy.

Could you maybe have a chat with your GP or a HC professional who knows your history and come up with a sensible plan for you to lose the bit of weight you want without running the risk of slipping into ED habits?

Good luck.

I feel you are too obsesed with weight and
Food. I think you should just ditch the scales, focus on healthy eating to feed your baby and the rest will happen naturally.

That is easier said than done though.

Bambury do you think it's possible that your body is holding onto a bit of extra weight while you're BFing? Despite all the chat about BF making the baby weight just drop off, I definitely held onto at least half a stone - probably more - while breastfeeding which went once my hormones had returned to normal. My diet was and still is extremely similar to the list in your first post.

I have also suffered from an ED so really do sympathise and understand. It's scary how easily I can slip back into disordered eating habits.

What I would say is the list on your first post sounds ideal. I honestly wouldn't change it - so is there any space for upping your exercise instead? Maybe half an hour running a few times a week?

You do not sound overweight. What is your BMI?

Reading what you've written I think there are other issues you need to pay attention to - the fixation on weight, the self perception of fatness and what doesn't seem like fat, and the strangely controlled diet and wanting to do even more.

Please speak to a GP.

I've managed to get down to 10 stone so my BMI is now 23. I still have a 32" waist and quite a fat tummy though.

I've managed to eat 3 meals again today though so I'm feeling better. I had been really struggling to eat anything these last few days so made an effort

so today I had my usual oats/chia/raisins/pecans with tea for breakfast.

Lunch was rocket/ 1/2 an avocado/2x eggs with mayo and sweet chilli sauce.

Afternoon snack of strawberries (4)

Dinner was more rocket, sweetcorn, chicken curry and rice (breakfast bowl small portion) with mango chutney and half a glass of wine.

Also had 6 squares of dark chocolate throughout the day.

No idea of the calories but it does seem to be a reasonably healthy diet? Not too restrictive but not too indulgent?

There is absolutely no point in my seeing a gp. The NHS had no funds or time for a healthy not underweight person such as myself. When I had anorexia in my 20s I needed to be below 7 stone before any treatment was funded - so had to get ill enough!

Your BMI is 23 and in your own words you are a healthy not underweight person

So what is it that you want? What advice specifically are you seeking? To go from a healthy BMI in the normal range to what? What will be satisfactory enough?

But more importantly can you really not see that you are bordering on psychological issues around weight/food? Especially given your history?

That is why I said see your GP. Not because I think you need gastric band surgery for your "fat" tummy. But because there are mental health issues around body food and weight which you could do with support on.

I'm finding it difficult to justify any food at all now.

This is the sign of serious mental health issues particularly in someone with a history of anorexia.

Please please go and speak to your GP and ask to be referred to someone trained to counsel people in this position.

Just forget about the food now. Keep with exercise for your own well being.Maybe throw in a few planks every day as it helps to bring tummy back to normal. As you are reastfeeding you have a responsibility to eat so you can nourish your little one.

Very similar position. Bf seems to make me hang onto the last half a stone. My plan is to keep my diet the same and instead focus on exercise and daily exercises to tone up.
Your diet sounds fine, perhaps focus on doing toning exercise daily?