I really don't know where to look or if something similar has been discussed but I am self sabotaging myself. Or at least, that's what I call it myself.
Since having my child, I never really lost the excess weight and it was a lot. I went from roughly BMI20 and super fit to BMI29 and couch potato bar some yoga here and there! And to my husband's credit, he still trains and he have a fully working gym in our own house.
I lost my appetite to train and even going on diets like (Cambridge and lighterlife) to kick-start my weightloss didn't work. I did healthy eating but I didn't lose anything.
I'm not depressed and I have an awesome life but I just can't get my shit together.
Any ideas? IT seems when breakfast/lunch/dinnertime comes, I can't think straight and eat fattening foods and treat food as a reward for either loosing a couple of pounds or because I want to taste it. I'm like hypnotized and can't wake up until I licked the plates clean so to speak but I never ever ever leave stuff in my plate, I eat everything. It's very strange. I can't describe it. Are there any thread I can read/books or anything that can make me think and get out of this funk? It's causing me anxiety and then I wake up in the middle of the night chastising myself for being a greedy pig and then I lie awake in self loathing for the rest of the night. Come morning all is forgotten and I'm back to do the same.