can I ask for some moral support and advice? I need to do something.

[echelon]

I'm 33 and ever since my early teens I've been overweight, it's gone up and down a lot over the years but I've always been at least 4 st overweight.

I did SlimFast shakes a couple of years ago and lost a couple of stone.
Then put it back on again (we moved house and I was homesick, so comfort ate a lot and we ordered takeaways etc a lot).

I have an unhealthy relationship with sugar. I will CRAVE it and CRAVE it almost every day, mostly in the evenings. I can quite happily eat entire packs of biscuits, entire tubs of Ben & Jerry icecream, entire 200g bars of Cadburys chocolate.
When I'm feeling low I comfort eat. I don't feel happy if i don't have something sugary in the house, eg a packet of biscuits.
I think I'm heavily addicted to sugar.
After a sugar binge I feel disgusted at myself and sick.

Lost the plot lately.. been having sensible(ish) breakfasts, not so sensible lunches, and not so sensible dinners such as creamy pasta dishes with cheese, pizzas etc. Friends came round Sunday and Monday, ended up getting takeaway on Sunday and barbecue yesterday.
Plus sweet crap as usual.

I weighed myself this morning. 18 stone 6 pounds.

EIGHTEEN AND A HALF STONE.
How did this happen to me and how did I let it happen?

I'm scared of heart disease, stroke. Diabetes. Sleep apnea. Arthritis.

For full disclosure I suffer with polycystic ovarian syndrome. Doctor told me once it's "linked" to obesity but I'm not sure how.

Today I'm going to start over. I've thrown out a cherry pie that was in the fridge and a half eaten packet of custard creams
I really really REALLY need some help and support though.
I have a sit down desk job which doesn't help.
DH is skinny and has a physical job which keeps him fit, but it also means he's always too tired to swim/gym/go for walks with me.

What kind of diet should I be following? How can I kick my sweet tooth addiction?
This is going to be so hard.
I need to do something though don't I.

[ppeatfruit]

Oh and I'm sorry Fluffy because I didn't read your original post properly about your wedding .

[FluffyPersian]

I think that exercise might have to wait until my back is better ppeat! Thankfully another session with the Chiropractor today went well and I'm hoping the Dr will progress things to a scan so we can get to the bottom of why it hurts .

I've always, always wanted a black wedding dress - Kinda fish tail.. I know when I lose a lot of weight, I've got a nice 'curvy' shape, as opposed to just 'flab' erupting everywhere at the moment! My wedding isn't until July 2018 so I've got plenty of time to lose weight... However I'd like to start now so there's no pressure!

1lb for Ben and Jerrys and strudel isn't bad echelon! That's still 6lbs down, right? Is there any way to plan your lunches or have something to grab if you're working long shifts? Really glad to hear your trousers feel loser - it's a nice feeling, isn't it?

When I was eating crap, it was almost like Russian roulette putting on my clothes, especially after I'd washed them. 'Will they still fit me'?... It's nice to think that I don't have to think that any more, if anything it will be 'Are they too loose on me?'

I'm still doing pretty well - I went out to a posh restaurant in London last night with my sister, however had a very low fat starter and salmon for main.. and that was it - No pudding and I had a cup of tea whilst my sister had a pudding. So far the 'mental' bit of me is under control, so I don't think I'm doing badly and I'm proud of myself for this morning, getting up.. making porridge and not thinking I've failed!

Going food shopping in a couple of hours after work - Got my shopping list ready so I shouldn't buy any junk food!

[ppeatfruit]

Fluffy Your back could be caused by pork I'm afraid! I also follow my blood type by Peter D'Adamo, it's quite radical, but I have NO aches and pains, I did used to, (or eczema or IBS type problems) at all since being on it, . I'm old too!!! D'Adamo says that the meat that no one should eat is pork!

I I remember talking to someone who had chosen a dark red wedding dress and she said the problem was the photos , no one could tell who the bride was! I suppose if you have a black veil too it might work!!

It makes such a lot of sense to do the weight loss slowly.

[FluffyPersian]

My back was caused by lifting a tray of pet food in the local corner shop when I was 18... it went 'crack' and for the last 16 years, it's been problematic ... I don't think I've eaten pork this year so not sure it's that - I think it's more physical stuff.. e.g. it fucked up again when I lifted a heavy paint pot and once again went 'crack' - annoying, as I actually tried to lift it properly!

I'm not fussed about people not knowing if I'm the bride or not - As long as I get some lovely photos with my Husband in the ruined Abbey, that's all that matters! Black veil is deffo happening as well .

How's everyones week going? The weather is absolutely DIRE in London at the moment! So far, healthy eating is still going well – Porridge for breakfast and salad for lunch again and still feeling very happy, motivated and counting down the days until the end of June when I can hopefully go new jeans shopping!

[ppeatfruit]

Oh that is annoying . DH has a good chiropractor they have to be good though. DS reckons her back was made worse by one .

Oooh a ruined abbey and black dress and veil, is your wedding going to be themed at all ?

I'm in Fr atm and we have the buckets of rain here too , we do need it though. It does make the weeds in the garden easier to pull out

[echelon]

Hi I'm back!!!

So sorry I haven't posted for forever. Wow it's been over a month.

I had a breakdown in mid May and have been off work /on medication. I suffer with depression and severe anxiety and I was dealing with a stressful situation that spiralled out of my control. Was referred to the crisis centre for counselling.

Still signed off work but am returning on Thursday
My meds are starting to work and I have resolved the stressful situation with the help of family and friends.

I'm sorry to say that my eating habits have gone to pot and I have put the weight back on.
I didn't eat for the first 2 weeks, just couldn't stomach anything. DH had to literally force me to swallow a spoonful of soup.

Then my appetite returned with a vengeance and I was SO SO hungry. I binged on pizzas, crisps, chocolate etc, and am craving sugar like never before..

So. It's time to get back on the wagon. Going shopping today.

Anyone got any help /advice??

[2nds]

Someone once told me to get a recent picture of yourself and put it on a cupboard where biscuits and crisps etc are stored and every time you go to that cupboard you see the picture. Now I have no idea if that really works or not but it might be something you could try? I haven't read the whole thread but I'm suggesting this because I take it your husband and anyone else in the house might not be dieting so they might want biscuits etc?

If it's any help at all I was weighed 6 weeks ago and I was exactly 18st. I havent weighed myself since because I haven't really dieted, however 3 months ago I gave up alcohol so I'm taking things slowly, kicking one bad habit at a time for now. I'm doing really well with giving up alcohol, I've not once even thought of giving in.

You can do this, you just need to find what works for you and stick to it.