Health and body a mess, need to lose 3 stone.... Where do I start and how long should it take

[FeelingBlobby]

So today I did it, I pulled myself together and climbed on the scales. I know I've put on too much weight but 3stone excess was a shock and I feel sick to the stomach at the physical mess I am in. I live a very full on life, I am working in academia, in the last stages of completing a full time PhD and kept very busy, I've two young children and a small farm. I feel I never have the time and space anymore to think about food and diet and so eat to convenience and drink too much wine as a way of relaxing.
I feel my husband doesn't find me attractive anymore, and I avoid photos, avoid mirrors and take little pride in myself, I hide behind my professional identity or mummy identity. Saddest part I used to be so fit and healthy, running regularly, mountain biking, playing netball, etc, and now I feel out of control of my health and body. And my family constantly comment, I hate big gatherings as made to feel so ashamed of myself.
I literally have no free time so need easy and doable, but accept it takes commitment and hard work. I'm also a planner, so need goals and ideas on what expectations to set myself.
This forum seemed an ideal place to start, any advice...

I get that breakfast thing! As soon as I eat for first time it's like a witch is definitely switched on!

Op.... Carbs are basically sugar and yes, it's everywhere. Unfortunately fruit is full of it and some veg. I'm not a hardcore low car er anymore, but I'm definitely aware that an apple and banana will hamper my weightloss. Sadly.

I know what you mean with the running.... Funnily enough my stone I need to lose is from the aftermath of running a marathon this year. Had to carb up to run ( overdid it) and after my marathon I had no other goals to work to, so took my eye off the ball a bit. Yeah, 5k is now a bit of a struggle!

The issue with breakfast is a hunger thing. If you do wake up hungry then skipping breakfast will screw up your dieting efforts as it may lead you to overeat later. However, if you don't feel hungry in the morning, then there is no issue with waiting to eat till you do.

Myself I don't feel hungry the minute I wake up, so generally I get up, do my jog, then prepare meals for the day, have my coffee (with lots of full cream :) ) in the car on my way to work, usually sit down and check my emails and then have my scrambled egg and bit of fried mushrooms at around 9:30/10. This holds me over till about 2 when I want to eat my salad and chicken for lunch.

Some people may feel like skipping the 9:30/10 and are great for a meal at 12. It's all relative to your own needs.

Oh bugger, well my banana and apple for breakfast probably wasn't the best start....

Oh bugger, well my banana and apple for breakfast probably wasn't the best start....

Those are perfectly legitimate healthy choices. :) However, did you feel hungrier after you ate them? I find if I eat fruit first thing I feel hungrier sooner, then if I ate an egg or bacon.

Teaching now till 2 so little choice about hunger but need healthy lunch choice! 😉

I'm having coffee with cream and bacon/egg/mushrooms for breakfast.late breakfast tho.

My nutritionist was adamant about not missing breakfast. She said that I might get too hungry and then I would lose the plot entirely. She felt there was too much time between the last meal, without breakfast.
If I don't eat little and often then I get very hungry and I have a lapse. Usually big time and uncontrolled.
I have about a stone to go and at the moment I am doing well.

I think to teach without any fuel in the morning is a bit savage on your body.
It is a hard enough job already. Could you drink soup from a flask?

A Healthy lunch would be a wholemeal wrap, with sliced tomato reduced fat cream cheese and cucumber and leaves. Wraps have got salt in them so you need to watch your daily salt intake.

Hi again - for low carbing, the low carb bootcamp thread on here is really useful. It's low carb rather than no carb so you get to (have to) eat a lot of veg! The basic rules are no high carb starchy food - bread, potatoes, rice, pasta etc, no fruit at the beginning and veg that grows above the ground. No artificial sweeteners either. It takes a while to get used to but I think is really sustainable and proven to work long term. The diet doctor website is very useful here too.

A typical day for me might be eggs or full fat yoghurt for breakfast if I feel like it (sometimes I'm not hungry) with coffee and cream, a chicken (or whatever leftover meat/fish I can stick in a packed lunch box) salad with mayonnaise for lunch and a piece of cheese for "pudding", then meat and lots of veg for dinner. I never let myself get hungry and also drink lots of water. Litres and litres!

The most useful thing for me from the Taubes book was that it really isn't your fault if you have a tendency to put on weight, excess fat is a symptom of a problem with insulin resistance related to a diet high in carbs, rather than a moral failing. I found it much easier to do something about my excess weight when I stopped feeling guilty about it!

It's really worth doing a bit of research into things and then finding a diet that works for you, as advice can be contradictory. My fitness pal, as others have said, is a really useful way to track weight/food. I use it for weight but can't be bothered tracking my food intake - but whatever works for you as an individual is what's important. I'm trying to think of it as a long term project, sorting out what kind of eating allows me to get to and sustain a decent weight, rather than a diet.

Fingers crossed for you, me and everyone here for a healthier 2016...

Generally speaking writing down every morsel of the food which passes my lips helps me not to fool myself

Even without recalculating calories I can see where my problems areas are.

Thank you all, you've all given really thoughtful and helpful advice. It is much appreciated!!!