I don't want to feckin diet!

[Jerseyknit]

I'm really anti-dieting. I want to take a moderate and sensible approach to losing weight but I'm seriously pissed off that all my efforts have achieved nothing. Not a bloody pound. In fact, I've put in another two pounds. Ffs. I just want to scream. I'm two stone over weight. I was eating what I wanted, when I wanted. I was drinking lots of alcohol. I've stopped eating rubbish. I'm trying to keep to three square meals a day. I'm having fruit for breakfast. Home made soup for lunch and a sensible meal in the evening. I've significantly reduced my alcohol intake. I allow myself treats but don't go mad. I'm definitely not as active as I should be but short of serious dieting I'm really not sure what else I can do. Please will someone help me

I hear you, Jersey, I hear you.... Im pretty much in the same boat.

I've cut out all gluten as it doesn't agree with me (and I know that), and restricted dairy, I eat 3 meals a day (no snacking) and almost no alcohol.

I reckon I should be about 3-400 calories (of crap) a day DOWN on what I used to consume, and yet my body refuses to acknowledge it in the form of weight loss.

I am taking a lot of supplements and also probiotics. I suffer from IBS and have done for years. Im menopausal, too.

So, sorry - not much advice, but heaps of sympathy!

The trouble is that all calories are not equal when it comes to what are body does with them (within reason of course-an excess of calories will lead to weight gain no matter what), but you can 'get away' with and feel much better and less hungry with a certain amount more calories if they are nutrient dense ones that your body needs. Deny hunger, set rules and restrictions and your body becomes stressed, which means it produces cortisol, signalling it to store fat (especially belly fat) and downgrade metabolism. This becomes a more sensitive 'switch' the more diets you have been on.

Unfortunately weight loss happens most often as a result of calorie deficit. To ensure you have a calorie deficit, use MyFitnessPal for a week. Work out your Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE, just google it) and MFP will calculate how many calories you should eat to ensure a deficit.

I would think you're eating too many carbs and not enough protein, which is much better at filling you up.

Exercise helps, not just for weight loss but for health too. But weight loss is generally 80% food intake and 20% exercise.

I've lost nearly 2st in 7 months on 5:2. It's not a diet for me, it's a way of eating which will be sustainable for the rest of my life. Because if, ultimately you fall back into old eating habits, all the old weight will return too. So I'm afraid you need to find a 'diet' which works for you. 5:2 isn't for everyone but the beauty of it is you only need to be strict on 2 days. If you crave something on a fast day, "you can have it tomorrow". That mantra is incredibly motivating and comforting.

So do your research. 16:8 is often a precursor to 5:2 so give it a few days and see how you feel. Good luck.

Track all your food in My Fitness Pal and weigh it as well - just forba week or so so that you can figure out how you are "spending" your calories.

From looking at what you eat it seems pretty low in protein? Protein and fat will keep you going longer than carbs - eggs for breakfast and some sort of protein with your lunch?

'Are body' ... Our!

If you have been steadily putting weight ON for some time, reducing your calories may only be enough to maintain your weight. You need to work out your TDEE (loads of calculators online) and see how your intake matches up.
Sadly we almost all need less food than we eat. It's a painful realisation.

It seems that although healthy, your diet is still rather high in sugars, albeit natural ones.

I had a similar issue and I thought I don't eat processed foods, eat loads of veg etc so I shouldn't put weight on. But when I started tracking my food I realised that I was eating too many calories, and these were mostly carbs (fruit, porridge, wholemeal bread, etc).

I have made a few changes, like Greek yoghurt for breakfast instead of porridge, a bit of cheese for a snack instead of fruit and it has made a real difference. Basically, rather than eat less I try and eat protein rich foods which keep me full.
I still eat all these things but tracking my food intake helps me keep the balance right. Like you I don't do diets, so this is great for me because nothing is off the menu, I just balance it out over the week.

If you don't want to 'diet', but change your eating habits, I recommend the Paul McKenna hypnosis CDs and books. They get you concentrating on what you're eating - listening to your body about what you need rather than you think you want, chewing your food so you recognise when you're full.

You can say you don't "diet" but there is ONLY one way to lose weight and that is to create a calories in vs calories out deficit.

You can do "sensible eating", cutting out booze, exercise, cabbage soup.... It all amounts to the same thing - you've got to take in fewer calories.

Some ways are easier and some are more restrictive. You will need to decide how quickly you want to see results and if they will be sustainable over the long term.

But saying you don't diet is like saying you want to lose weight without really doing much.

FWIW I lost 2stone of baby weight doing 5:2 and using the excellent support thread on here. I stopped doing it about 4 months ago and I've not re-gained an ounce.

I know slimming world has been mentioned but I've been doing it and it works, only 1lb a week but it's something. I've had yougurt and fruit for breakfast. Coronation chicken sandwich for lunch doing burger and chips for tea. You don't need to go to classes just download recipes from net.

Thanks everyone. Great ideas. I guess my point is I have reduced my calories significantly which is what i thought would help me lose weight. Sleep and few others have sensibly suggested looking at the nutritional value of what I'm eating and making changes accordingly. It's so annoying this getting older and having to watch what I eat malarkey. There was a time that I could lose half a stone in a week. I'm not dieting and don't see it that way. Ive tried 5:2 and slimming world in the past neither have worked and I would much rather not think if my eating as dieting. Because diets don't work, for me anyway. I do however want to be sensible and realistic about my food intake so mfp and changing what I eat is the way forward. I'm iff to the supermarche to get some smoked slalom for my scrambled eggs in the morning

Salmon!

You might like this TED talk Jersey.

why dieting doesn't usually work

Whilst we need an awareness of what good nutrition is (which can be confusing, the 'experts' opinions constantly change ) and what works for our bodies best (eg if gluten/dairy makes you ill or if you simply feel better on a veggie diet or not) I think mindful/intuitive eating is the only real way forward. I believe this is also the basis of Paul McKenna's work in this area.

I don't know what you weigh Jersey but there is sometimes also a need to accept and work with the fact that our 'healthy' weight isn't necessarily what we might think - I see people age 40 trying to diet their way to the same weight that they were when they were 20 (after a diet! ) and there usually isn't anything healthy or enjoyable about constantly struggling to achieve and maintain that! Our body composition and metabolism changes with time and that leads to a different shape and fat storage.

Exercise is a crucial part of it all too - maintaining muscle and flexibility and regular cardio - just walking is fine - makes a huge difference to health, metabolism and our shape.

What a fascinating talk! It makes a lot of sense from my perspective. I have started to try and chew my food many more times than I used to. Probably 30 - 40 times a mouthful. Takes an age to eat a meal, but I will persevere, and turn the TV off or stop reading the paper while I do so.

Maybe mindfulness is the way forward?

ishould that's what the Paul McKenna stuff is all about. There's even one audio track which tells you when to pick up your knife and fork,to chew, put your knife and fork down and when to start again!

Op you sound like you're doing everything right.
I suppose the only thing would be to log your calories onmfp, that would highlight if you're eating hidden calories or maybe deluding yourself (we all do it at some point) although that doesn't sound likely.
then, armed with a few weeks of print outs (you can also register and track your weight) visit your GP.

cocoa Yy to being mindful but I would be careful of turning eating into a chore, think of it more as a time to relax, savour and enjoy, which is as important as the nutritients we get from food. I think the lack of time and attention we are in the habit of paying to food contributes to the feeling of not being satisfied...hence we overeat and make choices that often represent more pleasure than nutrition and it becomes a vicious circle. It is possible to get as much pleasure from a great salad or soup as it is from pasta, cake or chips but by dieting and attaching judgement to foods (making them good/bad), we kind of train ourselves away from recognising that.

I was exactly the same as you - trying to lose weight but I was very resistant to start yet another diet and really wanted to sort out my eating so that I was eating healthier, but I did also want to lose some weight. I was getting so confused with trying to follow different advice, and switching around from one diet to another, and not actually losing any weight either.

So I then decided to subscribe to an online diet coach recommended by a couple of ladies at work. The diet coach produced an eating plan for me, which is a balanced and nutritious diet, but I've also been losing weight very successfully by following it. Weirdly I don't feel like I'm dieting, just planning my meals and enjoying my food, without all the junky snacking that I was doing before, but I know that it contains all the right amounts of protein, carbs etc. Maybe something like that might help you..?

I get what you're saying, sleep.

I like my food FAR too much to ever think its a chore to eat it!

Maybe I ought to invest in a Paul McKenna book/CD. Trouble is, I've spent a fortune on stuff like that for years, and I'm getting rather diet-weary...

Howhard, yes, please let me have the details of the coach. Thanks

OP - I totally agree with a previous poster. If you have been steadily gaining weight over the months or years, then you cutting down now is probably getting you to a point where you are sustaining your weight, rather than adding to it.

The food you've set out as an average daily intake sounds completely normal to me. It certainly doesn't sound crazy low or super restrained.

If you don't want to/can't cut down further on intake, then you need to find another way to create a higher calorie deficit. Normally, that would be through exercise.

You also don't say how long you've actually been doing this for. It can take a while before you notice any changes after changing your diet - especially as you get older.

It would probably be wise to get your thyroid/blood sugars checked out though to rule out any underlying health problems which may have an impact.

Jerseyknit the one I used was www.freedomdietcoach.co.uk I paid £75 for my plan (which also includes a maintenance plan once I reach goal) but they sent me an email a bit ago about a pre-Christmas special offer of £55 I think, so might be worth asking about that if you decide to email them..?

Me neither.

I've had a bowl of porridge, a boiled egg, two slices of peanut butter banana toast and a massive Danish pastry.

Oops.

Back on it tomorrow.