Is anyone else resigned to being on a diet forever?

[CambridgeBlue]

I've always gained weight easily, I love food and never seem to know when to stop - it's as though I'm worried all the nice food will be gone and I won't be able to have any more. Everything is my weakness - bread, chocolate, salty things, sweet things, wine, ice cream - you name it!

Over the years my weight has crept up. Although at times I've had some success with diets (I lost almost 4 stone on WW a few years ago) the minute I go back to my normal way of eating it all goes back on. I've put on 3 stones of that 4 recently and despite trying various 'lifestyle' approaches eg smaller portions, less snacking, more exercise etc nothing's working. I know the only way I will lose it is if I stick to a proper diet so I have signed up to WW again for what I think is the 5th or 6th time in my adult life.

I detest the idea of dieting though. The lack of spontaneity, the constant thinking about food, having to feel grateful for a pathetic handful of something as a 'treat', watching my family who never seem to gain weight tucking into snacks that don't fit into my plan. The only thing that makes me do it is the hatred I feel when I look in the mirror and the discomfort of my too-tight clothes.

I'm an educated, intelligent adult with a good job and a happy family. There's nothing missing in my life (that I'm aware of) so why am I unable to control my weight in a sensible way without resorting to a diet plan? I feel as though it's the only way I'll ever have a hope of staying slim but the thought of a future sticking to WW or any other plan is a really depressing one :(.

Yes me, and actually it's not that bad. I lost 5.5 stone with WW a few years ago and have kept it off, give or take a few pounds.

I tend to stick to plan during the week and relax at weekends, it works for me and I can stick to that no problem. I count calories these days though rather than pay for WW and it works just as well.

I eat good food, not processed rubbish so don't really feel deprived.

See if you can change your mindset. These things aren't really treats, they're sabotaging your efforts and are rarely worth it. Having said that, I always make sure I have enough calories banked for wine as that's my poison. I don't eat rubbish because it comes out of my wine allowance, so whatever you like, bank the points in advance for it.

Good luck.

I am accepting of the fact that I have to eat the right amount to stay the size I want.
If I want that to be bigger then I can eat more.
If I want that to be a healthy size to last me into old age it has to be less.

I do not do any sort of club or plan or miss out any food groups.
I eat one small and one good sized meal per day
I do not have alcohol during the week
I do not snack

It works.
It does mean saying no to food but that is just self discipine, not depressing.

Me. My 'normal' diet isn't normal enough apparently. I do struggle with portion sizes and take 4 sugars in my tea, so if I don't 'diet' I will creep a stone a year on steadily. I prefer slimming world to WW, because I think WW is too flexible and I won't have 8 points worth of cheesecake, I'll have 8 mini cheesecakes and lie to myself about it

I save my slimming world syns to the weekends and just go off plan for those two days and stay syn free, or as close to as possible, on weekdays.

Yes. I'm trying to flip my thinking and had a lightbulb moment (I'd previously started a thread saying I was bored & hungry after 1 day if dieting).

I was moaning saying I was thinking about food constantly and felt deprived. I realised that even when eating normally, I constantly think of food. As soon as I finished one meal I started thinking about the next. If I had a bar of chocolate in I couldn't think of anything else. Basically the thinking of food constantly wasn't a by-product of the diet. It was me.

I''ve also managed some success with flipping the "deprived" feeling. I previously felt deprived that I couldn't get the clothes or look I wanted. I still can't, but at least I feel that's temporary.

I've (hopefully) swapped feeling grateful to get clothes to fit for feeling grateful for a treat.

So what I think I'm saying is I've exchanged my old thoughts and feelings for new ones but realised my old thoughts weren't as free as I thought they were - they were trapping me. .

I think it us a mistake to think of junk food as a treat.

A smoothy is a treat, or a big bowl of strawberries/raspberries, fresh asparagus are a treat, as is dal. (Or roast peppers) Obviously what food you like is up to you, but junkfood is so not the only treat food!

A soft boiled egg is s treat for me, too.

I do find that more nutritious "treats" require a bit more effort than junk.

But you are worth making an effort for!

Also, eating delicious things that are not junk don't saddle you with a side order of self-loathing .

A dry salad without dressing, or a little WW choc flavoured low cal bar .... Are not treats though! That is just punishment-food that reinforces the idea that only junk food hits the spot.

I realised that even when eating normally, I constantly think of food. As soon as I finished one meal I started thinking about the next.

That is entirely normal
All people do it, even skinny ones.
DH sits at lunch asking what I've planned for supper
BUT
thinking about the next meal gives you time to plan something small and tasty
and not snack in the mean time

the bit that is tricky is to say no to food that you do not need

Yes, it is normal to think about food!

I do a lot. I basically plan meals during runs/swims.

One of my faves is noodle veg soup. Yum. And easy!

Like people have said upthread, I strongly believe that you shouldn't go on a diet, you should change your diet. Stop thinking of cakes and sweets as treats - they're not. I would never choose salad if I was eating out, but after a while, found that I really enjoy it. I would never go to WW, or give any organization money to help me do this, as the answer lies within myself.
Sorry if this sounds smug, but it worked for me, after years of being fat.

Me. I have bad PCOS and basically if I eat as much as normal folk I get fat. I have to be on reduced rations and a lot of exercise to stay the same nevermind lose weight.

I do 5:2

I lost a stone fairly quickly which has edged me into the top end of a healthy bmi. It seems to be maintaining that now so I'm sticking with it.

I would like to lose more but cba being stricter on non fast days or doing drastically more exercise. I'm quite happy with two hungry ish days. I'm used to it now, been going for 4 months now.

Long story, but I came home from work in a recovery truck tonight.
The driver told me that to maintain any sens of healthy weight he has

a small egg mc muffin for breakfast at 6am
then nothing till family supper ay 9pm
and three cups of tea in between

he's a solid, late 40's tattooed lad
who realises that turning down meals is the only sane way

I think the trouble is that what we would see as a "diet" is what slim people see as normal. So in that sense yes I will be on a diet forever! I think (however much I try to pretend it is not) it is true that it is about changing your life long term… So we all use diets to LOSE the weight in whatever way we choose but once we get to our target weight we also need to work out how we are going to stay there- exercise, diet, changing our mindset. I think that is harder than losing the weight. Which is annoying. I guess it is the old thing of if we do what we have always done we will get the results we have always had (i.e. overweight-ness)

I am currently transitioning back into food from a VLCD and am basically going for an extremely restricted diet to start with (vegan whole food as much as I can) with plenty of exercise until I work out what my body wants! I imagine long term it will be 5:2 but who knows!

I think once you get to target weight pick something that goes with your life style- whether that be 5:2, WW, SW etc and just see that as the new normal. And of course some days will be days you decide to eat something off that plan but most days that is how you eat

Can I suggest that you start to take a good multi vitamin, try and drink 2 litres of water ( or herbal tea) between meals a day, and chew every mouthful of food between 30 and 40 times. Eat a large breakfast, a medium lunch, and very very little for supper... Like a couple of rice cakes and honey.

Chewing makes meal times much longer, but I register the sensation of fullness much more. I've lost a stone in 3 months. I plan to just quietly keep at it.

It was when I rejoined WW for the third time that I realsied that it just wasn't working for me. Sitting in the back row with all the others who had done the same as me. So depressing!

TiP Loved the idea of 5:2. Did it for 14 months, but lost a total of 4lbs. I wish it had worked for me. Horses for courses and all that...

Oh, me! This thread is inspiring. I'm starting again with VLCD and trying to think ahead to the point where I stop dieting and keep the weight off.

I think refusing meals/ wine only at weekend is the way to go. Lots to think about. Thanks for starting this thread op!

I'm the same.

I've realised that if I want to be slim and healthy I have to watch what I eat. But after a while it must becomes normal and natural.

Slim people dont eat a lot, but once you get used to eating less you adapt.

I think people need to be totally re - educated about food : we've lost all perception of what normal portions are, and just food in general.

Our grand parents didn't have weight problems because they cooked from scratch and moved more.

I also think that a typical British diet is so bad : loads of spuds, pies, bread, crappy carbs. You dont need a mound of carbs with every meal!

This is an interesting thread. I am a classic comfort eater and in the throes of this at the moment, I see food as a treat and a way to relax. Right now I am tempted to go and get more dinner so that I can sit down for a bit longer, I basically take my anxiety and misery on food. I have decided that from now on I am going to cut out junk and still cook tasty meals (when I have time) that are treat, eg Jamaican food, home cooked curry, more effort but hopefully still enjoyable food. I am trying to look at junk food as sabotage as has been suggested. I'm quite tempted to try slimming world but not sure, have never joined a group before and I am not technically overweight, although I am overweight for me. On the plus side I am quite active, walk and rush everywhere, have joined a gym, need to go more often. Also quite tempted to start a diary on here, did this when I was loosing weigh two years ago but ended up getting slated for bad food choices although I did at that time lose weight successfully.

I hear you! I felt the same once upon a time, but now don't see it as dieting, just eating normally.. Bingeing on junk is the abormal option. I just make sure I make meals very tasty with spices, dressings etc so I look forward to them. Now I'm maintaining I do have treats but then straight back on the wagon the next day so I don't put any weight on. It's so freeing to enjoy the occasional junk without the guilt and self loathing!