Can you help me unfuck my diet?

[NellyBluth]

I thought this might be the best board for this.

Essentially, I just eat quite unhealthily and I'm starting to feel it. I need some ideas and inspiration - I don't want to do anything drastic, but I want some good ideas to start replacing all the bad habits and work my way towards a healthier diet. I'm starting to tell I'm eating loads of refined carbs and getting into that sugar high/dip cycle.

I'm ok with breakfast, which is generally a banana at home and then porridge later. Lunch at work I get a sandwich and have a packet of crisps - I know that isn't ideal but I try and get something like tuna or chicken salad, so that's not high up my list to change right now.

My big problems are -

Late afternoon snacks. I have lunch about one-ish. I have a decent commute home, then have to do bath time and bedtime with the toddler, so dinner isn't until 8ish. I tend to give in to biscuits and chocolate about 5 to get me through until dinner. I get quite hungry and really do want something that will last me. Is there anything other than nuts that will be a good slow burn?

Dinner. Three quarters of the time DH cooks and so I get a proper meal. But if he's at work in the evening, by the time I've got the toddler to bed I just tend to have toast or cereal or if I do cook its just pasta and a jar sauce. I really do need to have something better. I'm not a very good cook and we don't tend to have a lot in (we sort of buy what we need as we go along). I need some inspiration here!

Ditto lunches at the weekend (god I'm sounding rubbish now). Often I give DD her lunch while I do something else, and then I'm snacking on some variation of refined carbs while she's napping Her lunch will be pretty good, bread and veg, soup, something like that, but for some reason I'm out of the habit of eating those things with her. Especially as we're often out all morning so when we get in I'll serve her something really quickly. Again, I just need some inspiration for lunches for the two of us!

I think I've got into the habit of DH doing the thinking on dinner, and I need to kick myself up the arse. DD really does eat quite well for her age, she doesn't have my bad habits, but so many of the meals I make for her are sort of toddler-friendly and not something I think I want to eat. If it's just me and her for dinner I will make stew or spag bol, I'm not dire - I just can't seem to get the motivation to feed myself well, if that makes any sense?

If anyone can share any good snack and lunch tips that would be hugely appreciated.

Snacking is associated with insulin resistance = a bad thing

Go down the slow cooker route. Chop everything the night before, pop it in the slow cooker on low first thing at 7am. Come home to a glorious hearty meal.

It seems to me you are responsible for getting you and DD up and out in the mornings and then you also do bath and bedtime? That is a lot on your plate, and while DH cooks dinner and that is great, most sahms are going to be wrangling at least one baby or child and also cooking dinner, and many manage to get the DCs bathed and dinner cooked in the afternoon just so as to get one more thing off the list for the evening.

If DH picks up DD in the early afternoon then he needs to give her a bath at that time. You have long enough days without having to bath her and also do the bedtime routine. A bath for a toddler can be accomplished start to finish in under half an hour. He can then - or simultaneously - cook a meal.

You are going to crave carbs when you are stressed. Imo you currently have far too much 'duty' in your day, and I would hazard a guess that too many hours of being on duty is contributing to stress. You may not feel it but stress can creep up on you. So please get DH to give the quick bath and you can take a little more time in the evenings to unwind and relax a bit. It doesn't matter if DD hasn't eaten before the bath -- just wipe her down after she eats. She won't be festering for weeks with spag bol behind her ears. It can all be hosed off tomorrow.. You need time to properly wind down before bed so the less you have to get done in the evenings the better for you.

Also, how dark is your bedroom? You are not going to get healthy sleep if you are not in a room that is good and dark. Consider investing in blackout curtains and covering up any glowing digital lighting (alarm clock, phone, etc). Lack of decent sleep will also contribute to cravings for carbs (and caffeine).

(OP here, name-changed for another thread that was more personal so I suspect my posts won't change colour now)

Ah, I can see how it reads like that math, but it's not. DH works full-time too, we do different hours. It might sound like I've had a long day but he's been up since 5am, worked 7-3, picked up DD and is still going at 7pm cooking dinner. It's not the days he's in that's the problem at all. (Sorry, getting a bit defensive there when there's no need but he works bloody hard )

You are probably right about the accumulative stress - we both love our jobs and DD but two full-time working parents, doing different shifts, adds up cumulatively. As I don't enjoy cooking, that's why I default to cereal or toast because I don't see cooking as a relaxing thing to do in the evening.

He still needs to get DD into the bath when she gets home. He has four hours from 3 to 7. Or he could cook earlier and then just reheat so he isn't on the go for so long? And then give DD her bath after she has eaten around 5? His day doesn't have to involve cooking so late and your day doesn't have to involve so much DD duty late into the evening either. (Though it's sometimes nice to bathe toddlers and some find it soothing it is still one more thing you have to do before you can call it a day iyswim).

Sorry if I sounded as if I was getting on DH's case. I do think things could be tweaked a bit to take some of it off your shoulders though.

have you tried eating a proper meal at lunchtime instead of sandwiches and crisps? It keeps you going for so much longer. Use the slow cooker for dinner. When I'm in the office I always eat a proper meal for lunch, nothing worse than an hours drive home ravenous.

Talkinpeace, I eat a cooked lunch most days in addition to a cooked dinner. I eat as much as I can physically fit in. When I was trying hard to put on weight I ate approx 2200-2500 calories a day and it still took me 2.5 years to put on 10 pounds. So the snacks are here to stay.

I think eating two cooked meals a day is why you struggle to put on weight. A Sandwich and crisps for example is as many calories but you are hungry again much quicker.

Sandwiches are a weird British obsession imo

Try making a big pot of soup at the weekends and freezing in portions - this is my quick hot meal, I top with meat or cheese and a dollop of Greek yoghurt and it keeps me full for ages. Freezer meals are great for those moments when you can't be bothered cooking.
Agree slow cooker can be a life saver. Roast chicken is easy too, just chuck some veg around it, add a jar of pesto or Harissa.
Experiment with new dishes for midweek, at the weekend, when you have more time - I attempt to try one new dish each weekend. Diana Henry's "simple cooking" has some great ideas.
Mostly if you just aim to eat more veg and less processed food you'll be doing yourself a massive favour.

Full fat yoghurt with a little bit of granola and some blueberries fills me up at snack time. I aim to eat before I am hungry so I'm not feeling so hungry I grab at everything.... Just had marshmallows today but that was calculated into mfp so still under my calories.
I also often make stir fry with just soy sauce and do a double portion so I have lunch for the next day.