How to help my mum lose weight?

[waysandmeans]

Recently I've been worrying more and more over my mum's weight and health. Even my normally reserved DP has voiced concerns. She has had several serious health scares in the past few years but if anything her diet/lifestyle has gotten worse. Does anyone have suggestions as to how to broach the subject with her and offer support? Usually when I try she either gets very angry or very upset.

nothing you can do
she has to do it for herself
sorry
but the truth

To clarify, she doesn't need to lose a few pounds, she needs to lose over half her body weight.

yup, still nothing you can do.
its really, really galling and depressing
but until she sees that she has to make a change you are just picking fights with her

out of interest, are you slim?
when she comes round do you make sure that drinks are healthy, no snacks are on offer and meals are small ...
lead by example, its all you can do

hello
waysandmeans !!!
i have read your story..
it is so depressing !!
gives her few examples of some diet and exercise. b'coz to losing weight, these two factors are mostly participate in your weight lose affords.

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I agree with Talkin. Fat people know they're fat. They don't need to be told and sometimes it just makes you feel worse anyway.

Could you do a healthy eating plan and ask her to accompany you - say you don't want to go/do it alone alone? Weight Watchers, Slimming World or even just using MyFitnessPal? 5:2?

Thanks folks, much appreciated! I know you're all right and that she has to do it herself. I guess I was just hoping there were some magic words to gen her along.

Like you said beans, she doesn't need to be told, she knows. She is also terribly unhappy and insecure and my heart breaks for her.

My DP and sister have both been on my back to do something. Have a chat. Write a letter to her. Even pay for a personal trainer as a Christmas present. I have mentioned to her I want to train for a marathon next year so perhaps we could do clean eating together. Yes Talkin, I am slim and I see the point you are making.

When she comes to visit she wants to take me out to dinner - usually a three course meal with sides. When I order healthy she tells me I'm being boring. Often when I visit the family, they get takeaway as a "treat" for me. I've cooked dinner a few times and it has always been met with "that's nice but we couldn't eat it every day". They also use the car for the smallest distances. Oh I love them all so much but I despair.

If she really is very fat I wouldn't bother with a personal trainer or running. It'll likely be far too difficult for her and will put her off exercise and could wreck her knees! What about a pedometer for Christmas? Moving more makes a bit of a difference to your health but doesn't result in weight loss if you don't substationally cut the cals.

My DP seems to believe that we could find a personal trainer who also does meal plans etc. Sorry, I'm not sure if personal trainer is the right name for it. But I agree, I don't think that is the right way to go.

According to her GP her metabolism is so slow that even near-starving herself would make very little difference. But a pedometer could be a good idea, thanks.

According to her GP her metabolism is so slow that even near-starving herself would make very little difference
did she tell you that, or have you heard the Doctor say it?
because medically its extremely unlikely.

No to a personal trainer - she's a person not a dog
yes to a pedometer

pick your battles.
WHEN she decides to change THEN you give her support
but pushing will just make her dig her heels in