Just keep getting fatter [sad]

[aroomofherown]

I really need your advice. I have been putting on weight steadily over the last year due to various things, and now my life has spun into super-busy and I need some wise MNers to get me sorted out.

I have tried 5:2, Slimming World, low-carb/paleo, and enjoyed all of them. Unfortunately life got in the way and it didn't last. I know, it sounds like excuses (but I don't know how to keep going).

I leave for work around 6.30am, and two - three nights a week I don't get home until around 10pm as I study part-time as well as work full time. I don't have kids (so theoretically this should be easier). I started a new job 6 weeks ago.

I have cut my alcohol intake to about half, and only have a drink or two on 2 - 3 nights per week. I enjoy cooking but do it far less due to lack of time AND a lack of energy.

When I'm tired - like tonight after 2 sixteen hour days, I make very poor food choice (such as a massive bag of cheese balls ). Basically I think my problem is that I panic that I may not have food and then eat as much as I can fit in when i see food in front of me. Whilst I used to pack lunches for work, now I eat in the canteen and have dinner on the run wherever I can.

I don't think I know what normal food intake is and I'm too tired to find out. I get hungry very often, although I think it might be emotional/mental hunger rather than my body actually needing sustenance.

Sorry for the long post - any advice about how to handle this is welcome. I'm having to buy bigger clothes, I feel disgusting and out of control. I was supposed to go for a swim this afternoon but was too tired and came home and ate instead .

I really hope someone comes along with some good advice soon, I am not at all qualified to give any as your post could almost describe my own life. Every time I see myself in the mirror I can't stop hating myself cos of how bad I've let this get, but I still don't seem to be able to make it better. I hope you get some useful answers.

Which 'diet' gave you the best results?

What kind if thing is your canteen offering you?

I'd do 5:2 on the days you're not working

Do you drink plenty? you sound so busy maybe you are getting dehydrated but mistaking it for hunger

Ask your GP for a referral to a dietician, they will talk you through what "normal" is.

I wouldn't recommend any of the faddy diets because they only work if you stick to them and you need iron will power to do that.

You could try an App like MyFitnessPal which works out all the calories you're eating but I find it deathly boring to enter everything.

What works for me is planning... Every meal and snack a week in advance. And treats like a bag of cheesy whatevers are a once a week thing.

And it will probably help if you stop drinking altogether... Bad decisions happen after a glass or two of wine and it totally fucks with your calorie intake.

I've never found a quick way to lose weight, I went from 17st to 11st but it took a year of rigid control... I went back up to 14st when pregnant and now down to 12st 7lbs. I'm doing low carb, high protein and no alcohol whatsoever... It's a hard slog...

You sound a little self indulgent and sound like you might be playing the victim rather than taking responsibilities for your choices.

1 Cut out alcohol for 8 weeks.

1. Have 2 wheetabix for breakfast.

Food is not the enemy it is there to nourish your body, try to eat nourishing food. It's better to take the risk of being hungry on the odd night than to use this as a crutch to eat bad fat laden carbs.

Stock your home with healthy non-perishable foods.
Even eggs and beans is relatively healthy and better than the other crap you have listed.

Sorry that post sounds more harsh than I meant it to, my basic message is you need to take control.

Stop with the dieting. Long term for the majority diets don't work. If they did you wouldn't have to keep going on them and off them. Try learning how to eat like a normal person again. If your not sure then there are plenty of books out there. You need to buy all the foods you love to eat but only eat when you are truly hungry and your body needs food and then stop when your satisfied. When your hungry again, eat but again stop when your satisfied. Diets do not work.

Thanks for the responses. I think I am dehydrated, so that's one thing I need to keep an eye on. Molly I think you are right about being self indulgent, I think I have an internal belief that I will never be able to lose weight and so
I do feel like a victim. I think I will cut out alcohol and try lower carbing to start with. I normally have porridge with water and no sugar for breakfast so my day starts well, and tends to finish badly.

It's a long slog but it's the logistics of being organised with good that I'm finding hard. I will bear in mind that there's no easy option but to persist.

I follow sw - it requires a certain amount of planning, which it sounds like you don't have time for?

If I were you id try 5:2

Good luck with trying another diet OP.

I have lost a stone over the last 6 months doing the "eat like a normal person" diet.
I have normal meals but try to reduce the carbs and up the veg.
Example chilli with small amount of brown rice a corn on the cob and some broccoli.
One slice of toast an egg and some fruit.
No booze in the week and try to snack on fruit.
I don't stick to it 100% but its working.
I even lost a bit more this week as I walked everywhere, not miles just to toddler groups, hospital app and shops.

I've just been to see my GP about losing weight as I am in much the same position as you. He has suggested that I should keep a food diary for 1 week with all of the foods I eat and calculate the calories. I am using the My Fitness Pal App. This gives a good overall view of your eating habits across an average week. He then said to work out the average calories and then take 500 calories away and aim for that each day. So for example if average calorie consumption is 2500, aim for 2000. He also suggested trying to fit in a bit of exercise every other day, so a walk to the shop, a DVD, a session on the Wii, an exercise class, a walk in the countryside/park at the weekend. Anything small that you can fit in.

I would try and look at the best eat on the run/quick options as it sounds like you are time starved and also bear in mind that you need a reasonable amount of energy to sustain your busy lifestyle. For example:

Reay meals, maybe lighter choice/weighwaterchers ones (chilled, takes less time to heat up). Bulk it out with a portion of birds eye steam fresh veg
Worth looking at which sandwiches/salads/soups from differnt food outlets/supermarkets are best in terms of calorie count. Sushi may be a good option (although not the cheapest). Also pots of fresh soup, contain some of your five a day, quick, often on offer 3 for 2 etc, can be eaten out of the pot, another time saver.
Breakfast biscuits with a piece of fruit or yoghurt for some protein.
A handfuil of almonds as a snack (about 70 calories).
I'm another one with a busy lifestyel during the week, did similar to the above in the summer and lost 9 pounds. Some has gone back on so have started again. O, other good idea is to keep a food diary or sign up to myfiteness pal. I think that you can also allow yourself a treat every day, whenever you feel you most need it for energy, for me this is school run time unsurprisingly. Good luck, you can do it even with no time.

I don't have one but I want one: Fitbit, they monitor your exercise levels and how fit you are, apparently they get quiet addictive and make you want to do more and more exercise.

Also when you get a craving ask yourself is this a sugar craving or am I physically hungry.

You mentioned a canteen that you use. Our canteen in work is not very health conscious, but you can get an all protein breakfast (if you want), soup or salad for lunch/or have the hot meal option if it is healthy, followed by something small at home for your tea.

I think when you are trying to lose weight it is 80% diet and 20% exercise, but it is even better to seperate the two in your head. You can be fat and fit, and people can be low body weight and unfit. You want to meet somewhere in the middle. Don't trade exercise for more calories, if you do that you will end up being fat and fit.

I bought a book at the start of this year that I thought was great, it was a reader digest's book called Conquering Heart Attack and Stroke, it was really sensible and everyday advise.

Thanks for the tips - octopus those ideas sound manageable as you are right, I'm time starved. If only that meant I was food deficient as well

Molly that's what I am - fat and fit. Now I know why - I've been trading calories for exercise for years.

I'm opting for a jacket potato and beans for lunch, with cucumber and tomato salad. Porridge and fruit for breakfast, and think I'll make a big tub of vegetable soup/lentil stew or something on the weekend to get me through next week for dinner. Apples for snacks and a coffee on uni days. I might get me some yoghurts for work snacks as well.

My fitness pal is set to 1200 calories which I can't really manage, even on pretty good days. Might go up to 1500.

1500 sounds more sustainable and also might allow you come chocolate. Good luck.

There are some good tips in this weeks's Woman magazine.

You sound just like me! In which case your problem starts with your thinking not your eating.

Your new mantra is "hunger is not an emergency" and "I am in control of my eating"

If you are worried about being hungry, then make sure you have healthy snacks with you, preferably some protein based.

Make sure you are drinking lots.

Before you eat anything ask yourself "is this something a person who is in control of their eating would do?"

I suspect You need a different mindset, rather than a different diet.

hermione you are right. It's the thinking, and when I get super busy and feel less in control, it comes undone.

I am not about to starve. In fact, i don't think I've ever been so hungry as to even shake or faint, so it is highly unlikely to develop into an emergency

octopus is Woman magazine online? I've never heard of it.

aroom putting aside the poor food choices, it sounds like you are constantly in a state of low level stress, never stopping to properly take your time over a meal. I appreciate you probably feel that you can't possibly do this because you are so busy, but consider that it is probably contributing substantially to your weight gain...when in a stress response your body is producing excess cortisol and insulin. Both of these lead to weight gain (or at the very least, weight retention). In addition, your body will be in 'fight or flight' mode, where digestive and metabolic processes are not prioritised, so your food won't be broken down and used as efficiently as it should be...again, leading to impaired absorption of nutrients and weight gain. Eating in a rush also means you don't give your body the chance to recognise when it is full...so you overeat, and we know, again, what that leads to .

Rather than trying a 'diet' - they don't work! plan your meals to include plenty of lean protein, good fats and whole food (and water). Avoid refined sugar and anything processed, especially ready meals and beige carbs. Take time out to eat mindfully and enjoy your food. It's not more control you need, it's more love and respect for your body.

i find alcohol makes you reach out for all the bad food the more you drink the more hungary you get i try to cut it out completly but it is hard. the drink i enjoy is tonic with a dash of lime. try writing all your bad habits down and then change them ive found writing a food diary helps.16 hrs day is a long time but if you change your food habits you will have more energy.