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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

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Original poster

Why did I feel ashamed to admit I was going to weight watchers?

12 replies

Lilliput · 16/02/2006 19:27

All the mums and their toddlers get together at someone's house every Thursday and there is always cake, biscuits etc. When the chocolate cake was offered I declined and evryone gave me a look and then someone said are you on a diet and I 'confessed' I had started weight watchers a couple of weekd ago. I felt a little ashamed and embarrassed by this. All the other mummies are a size 8/10, the biggest a size 12, then there's me size 16 and to be honest this is one of the reasons I wanted to lose weight, I don't want to be the fat friend that makes evryone else feel better and slimmer themselves. Of course I am doing it for myself as well as my kids. Not one of the other 6 or 7 mums had ever been to slimming club or had any need to, so they were saying is it like Fat Fighters etc HA HA. I felt quite embarrassed having to justify myself.

OP posts:

Crystaltips · 16/02/2006 19:30

Don't feel like you have to apologise to anyone ... you are great - and if those mums sniff down their noses at you ...... then ....

Let them eat cake

Cristina7 · 16/02/2006 19:42

I went to WW too and had absoluetly no problem telling anyone about it (in the right context, obviously). Well done for doing something about your weight. WW is the healthy way, you aren't/shouldn't be starving yourself. The recipes in their cookbooks are great. Who cares how the other mums stay fit? maybe they've had gastric surgery

Original poster

Lilliput · 16/02/2006 20:36

They've not had gastric surgery just lucky genes and wealthy enough to have their own gym!!

OP posts:

Earlybird · 16/02/2006 20:49

Lilliput - Well done for finding the motivation/strength to go to Weightwatchers.

Sometimes I find it's easier to be selective about what I tell people - especially if they're simply acquaintances and not dear friends. It's not their business, so why make yourself feel uncomfortable - especially if you think you'll be questioned/judged? Sometimes it's much easier to say something like "no thanks, not in the mood today" or "just don't feel like it". Next week if someone asks you about the diet, you could say something to downplay it like "I'm just trying to be a bit more sensible about what I eat". Don't get into a discussion if you feel uncomfortable. You don't owe anyone an explanation, and I find, it's far better to confide in those who will be completely supportive.

Good luck with it and don't let those women diminish your resolve.

teacups · 16/02/2006 22:28

Have felt like this many times in the past lilliput. It's very difficult when you feel like the big girl among the others.

I have just done WW to shift my baby weight - 1st gone and another to go. I am happy to talk about it to a sympathetic audience but if I am feeling delicate / sensitive, then I say that I have eaten a cake on the way in the car, or had a choc bar as I walked to house for tea! Complete lie obviously, but makes everyone feel more comfortable. Being seen as having been "naughty" already that day helps you to avoid the dieting Q.

Size 16 is the ave in this country for women. It is not huge and nothing to be ashamed of. Being mean to someone and making a joke at someone else's expense is, IMO, something to be ashamed of. They have the problem, not you - stick with it and don't let them make you feel bad.

Chin up and let us know how you get on.

colditz · 16/02/2006 22:30

Make up allergies, or intolerances, like wheat intolerance, or migraines caused by chocolate, or rashes caused by strawberries, etc.

Saker · 17/02/2006 20:02

I think a lot of "indulgence" in eating cakes etc is justified by doing it in a group and the balance is upset if one person refuses to be "naughty". It may be that you actually made them feel a bit uncomfortable by making a healthy choice.

messagedeleted · 17/02/2006 20:04

i loved going to www
so funy
theere was this one wuite fat woman who was obv a long term dieter 0 fari enough but hwenever you asked the leader about points shed but in rather " my freind kimblery" in manner and sullenly shout out

"3"

anniebear · 18/02/2006 08:19

you obvioulsy need to choose your friends more wisely....fat ones always help!!!!

anniebear · 18/02/2006 08:20

that was no help at all for you was it?!! lol

sorry!!!

Original poster

Lilliput · 18/02/2006 20:07

No, not really! I so wished I hadn't said anything, saw a couple of them today and they asked how I was getting on with my 'diet'. One of them asked if I would like to go nordic walking with her...er no thanks! She is very slim very fit and has her own gym and sauna in her basement so the thought of excersising with her is just too humiliating.

OP posts:

anniebear · 19/02/2006 10:41

One of my friends i slim but she just lost 3 stone to get there and another is overweight, it is great to be able to talk 'weighty things' with them, even joke about our weight at times!!

Thats all I meant by saying "get some fat friends"!!

Have a bad sense of humour

They totally understand were I am coming from

How do you know none of the others haven't lost weight in the past?! I am sure they are not bothered that you want to lose some weight and will most prob be interested how much you are losing

And I bet you anything those skinny size 8 Mums won't be happy with their bodies.....far from it

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