Don't know where to start but would appreciate some hand holding and a kick up the butt!

[morelovetogive]

Hi,
I have had a couple of wake up calls lately and realised i need to improve myself generally. I am making more effort with my appearance and self confidence is starting to improve but i need to sort out my eating habits and learn to love exercise! I'm 28, i've got a 20 month old daughter and a husband with an active job and a high metabolism who is very lovely but crap at being supportive about me getting into shape! I am 5ft7/8ish and currently 13st 2lb. I'd really like to get under 11 stone which i think is about right for my frame. More than that i'd really like to stop the binge eating. I eat sugary crap by the bucket load and can't seem to kick the habit. I also have a limited cooking repetoire and am a really fussy eater which makes things difficult. I am also on a very limited budget at the moment. I really need some help and encouragement to help me change. I DO NOT want to 'go on a diet'. My mum dieted constantly when i was a child and i do not want my daughter to grow up with that. Instead i want to simply learn how to be healthier and find simple ways to improve my diet and to get exercise throughout the day. If there are others in the same boat who would be willing to be there at times of crisis to stop me failing and i will do my best to do the same and to help with new ideas for meals and exercising.

Thanks

okay I LOVE kicking people up the butt

How fussy are you? What do /dont you eat?

Excellent!

Ok, i love most fruit but am not much of a veg person. I don't really like beans (other than heinz baked!) and pulses in the like. These two things are my biggest problem when i look at recipes. That and i don't like onions which seems to be in EVERYTHING! I eat most meats but have only recently started to try fish and then only salmon or fish and chip shop cod or haddock! Typical meals in our house are something on toast or something egg based (we have chickens) for lunch and for dinner, macaroni cheese, lasagne, shephards pie, chicken and wedges, pie and mash of some description, quiche and salad. I have an issue about trying new things almost to the point of being afraid of it but i'm working on that. I generally cook from scratch other than say once a week when i cheat. I don't particularly enjoy cooking unless its for an occasion.

Well you dont sound that fussy to me

The key to making it 'not like a diet' is to make small, hardly noticeable changes that you can maintain for the rest of your life. Because that's what you will have to do, if it isnt going to be a 'diet' . It willl be healthier eating

So you eat salmon, cod. Wrap salmon up in foil parcel and bake it either with lemon, or pesto or olive oil. Serve with salad, or new potatoes (not too many and not dripping in butter)

You eat chicken, have chicken breast cooked the same way (I wrap in parma ham or with a small slice of strong cheese inside) and again have with salad.

lasagne,pasta,quiche okay as long as not huge portion fill up with salad.

Eggs are great, make 2 egg omlettes ,again with salad (you're going to be eating a LOT of that or sliced toms, whatever floats your boat that isnt too carby.

See how much you can do!

I would give the pie and mash a miss tbh.

BUT BUT BUT STOP BUYING SWEET CRAP. You cannot buy it anymore if you cant stop eating it. It will only encourage you to sabotage your good intentions. If anyone moans, TOUGH.

You say you dont like veg, I'm not a veg fan either but I DO love making veg soup (smooth, not lumpy) and when the weather gets colder its a great filler upper. Try it, you might surprise yourself

Thanks thats a good start! Mind if i run my meal plans by you for this week?

Tonight is left over cold meat with salad and new potatoes so ok as long as i lay of the mayo a bit which is another bad habit of mine!
Tuesday - Lunch is a picnic with a friend and our children. Bound to be naughties but i will just be sensible and not have lots. Unfortunately i have been tasked with bringing the cake. Dinner probably chicken and sweetcorn pasta bake.
Wednsday - Out again for lunch with a friend so who knows. Dinner, We have some sausages to use up is there a healthy way to eat sausages??
Thursday -Something on toast for lunch. Dinner, quiche salad and jackets.
Friday - Lunch, left over quiche and salad if there is any or sandwiches if not. Dinner, something with mince, lasagne probably.
Saturday - Usually the cheats night and often a frozen pizza and chips or similar in front of the telly with a glass or two of wine if we can afford it
Sunday - DH usually cooks a roast of some description (usually followed by something like a fruit crumble)

Breakfast all week for everyone else is toast but i've been having a smoothy (bought) though i am hungry again by mid morning and tend to reach for the biscuts then so will try and get something else in, more fruit perhaps.

Will have a think about exercise....

Will get rid of sweet stuff and then tell DH he'll have to eat cakes and biscuits while he's at work if he wants them.

Drinks wise, i'm rubbish at drinking water and usually have coffee in the morning followed by lots of tea and the odd glass of dilute stuff.

Now, how do i stop myself coming up with an excuse to drive to the shops when i'm craving cake so that i can buy some??

If faced with a craving have drink of water, do something else

Your diet does seem a bit carb heavy, lots of bread/toast/jackets. This might need reining in a bit if you want to lose a bit, or just cut your normal portion size. How much of 'something on toast' do you have when you have it?

I always serve myself up last so I can compare my plate with everyone elses!

Try eating your way for a week with no snacking on crap. Take your daughter out for a fast walk if you feel the urge to binge is overcoming you!

Not really a healthy way to eat sausgaes, just dont eat too many

Bought smoothies are full of sugar aren't they?
I've started making my pasta sauce/lasgne/mince etc by blitzing the veggies in the food processor first - so you can have onions - they just turn to mush.
Don't have quiche - pastry is loaded with calories.
Why not have an omlette for brekkie - I have one with a bit of grated cheese. I get the danish type bread - which is quite thin - but makes lovely crispy toast.
I find I drink more water if I make it a bit 'posh' with loads of ice cubes and a straw.

Toast wise i will usually have 2 slices with say a couple of eggs or share a tin of beans with DD, something like that.

I agree that i am heavy on the carbs. Should i replace them with something else or just cut some out? I think i rely on them to fill me up.

Thanks so much you've been really helpful. I wish i had better will power it would make it all so much easier!

When I have been specifically trying to lose weight for something (like my 40th) I cut it down to 1 slice with something on

But that wasnt really sustainable for me

So perhaps have your usual portion, cut out the sugary stuff and see how you get on

Agree with Tracy about blitzing veg to make it undectable- adds flavour too

Sorry Tracy xposted!
Just checking the smoothy box now...100% fruit so safe with that one! Omlette for breckie a good idea, will look for that bread too. I used to buy granola and have that with fruit and yoghurt but i'm guessing granola isn't great!
Will have a think about what to swap the quiche for. Part of the problem is that i'm a bit stuck in a rut with my cooking i think so it might be ime to learn a few more recipes.
Lol at pimping my water, definitely worth a try!

Excellent, got some good ideas to get me started. Thanks

If you feel snacky have a couple of slices of ham/fat free yoghurt/cube cheese/big drink water

what about making a tortilla thing that you can slice up, Spanish style with eggs, ham, bit of strong cheese (more flavour and dont use so much) and any veg that you do eat

I make a nice tortilla - new potatoes, chorizo, salmon, peas, and a dusting of paprika.
I think if you added a huge salad on the side and eat it first- it will allow you to cut your portions down of the main thing.
The danish bread is in the same place as the weight watchers type bread - it goes nice and crispy too. I usually try and stock up when I see them reduced as they are about 80p for a small loaf!
Crackerbread is nice too - like not cheesy watsits! Nice and crispy - but nowhere as fattening as bread or cream crackers.
Granola is very fattening - though I think Patrick Holfords is not too bad - esp. if you are following his low GI diet.

The recipe I follow for blitzing the veggies advocates browning them for at least 20 mins -till they almost burn - thats where the flavour comes from seemingly.
It makes a fantastic ragu - but with a full bottle of red wine in it - may not be too healthy!
Also - keep yourself busy - so as not to snack.

I think thats part of my problem though TracyK. MY DD keeps me VERY busy most of the day so when i do get a break when she's napping or ocupied playing by herself for a few minutes i suddenly realise that i'm starving and grab thequickest, closest most 'satisfying' thing. Usualy a chocolate biscuit or 6 and scoff them in the kitchen so she doesn't see and learn my appauling eating habits!!

If you can't do without your biccies - go through the packets in the biscuit aisle and see which ones are the least fattening - ginger snaps if I remember correctly - but yuk for me!
I swapped my semi skimmed to skimmed milk for a milky coffee - it really fills you up and just have 2 biccies with it NO MORE! but only rich teas or g snaps or the like.
Or have a pot of soup on the go - but I would need something carbs with it - maybe 1 slice of the danish toast?
Even a little change may make a diff - you haven't really got that much to lose. And see if you can get to a gym or a class in the evenings - then the weight will drop off.

Oh and don't do what I do and stand and butter cracker, eat cracker, butter cracker, eat cracker....
Get what you are going to eat, put it on a plate AND PUT THE PACKET AWAY!
Also read if you keep a food diary - wrtie in it BEFORE you eat it - then you have to acknowlegde you are a piggy!

I found the easiest way to lose weight the last time I did it was to count calories. I have tried cutting down the carbs several times and failed miserably. I used www.weightlossresources.co.uk but food focus does the same thing and is free. I just cut down to about 1400 cals a day but exercised every day too. If I didn't exercise I ate 1200 a day. I lost 4 stone in about 8 months this way and was very toned through the exercise. My daily diet would be something like this:-

B: 2 slices toast (from 400g loaf as they are smaller) with thin spread low fat butter and 2 eggs or beans
L: Sandwich for about 300 cals (easier if you do homemade) or maybe small jacket pot with tuna and light mayo
D: Stew or piece of meat/fish with mash and lots of veg
S: Snack a Jacks or houmous and carrot sticks

Just water for drinks apart from on nights out helped too. I tried to exercise as much as poss so I could eat a bit more (usually just a Davina DVD or a 40 min run which I hated at first but got better at with time!). When I was exercising 4-5 times a week for an hour at a time the weight fell off and my body looked great. I went from 13st 11 to 9st 11 and I had two young children at the time - it can be done but you need to have a weekly menu and make the time to exercise (I did an hour after they went to bed).

You can still lose weight by eating carbs although it is not as fast but I still averaged 1.5 to 2lbs a week which is pretty good. I found taking the meals I normally eat and making them low fat versions helped a lot.

Oh yes and food diary is very important which is why these websites help as you can put it all in online :)

Cut out the sugary stuff and keep processed carbs eg white flour / white pasta etc to a minimum.

I got great weight loss through significantly cutting carbs but if you are on limited budget, don't eat pulses and don't really like vegetables then that isn't really viable.

Some people find that its very hard to give up the sugar crap without cutting down on carbs - see Potatoes not prozac about sugar addiction, but this may not be an issue for you.

Drink loads of water.

You can make low fat / lower calorie options of all the meals you mentioned.

My mum also dieted as a child, eating a grapefruit for dinner...my children know that I have being dieting but to them being on diet means eating mountains of vegetables normal sized portions of what we call healthy food - chicken, fish, fruit, rice etc and limited chocolate / biscuits / cakes etc.

I could have been you 2 weeks ago. I have 2 DD's 2.3 and 7 months. I am 5ft10 and was 98kgs!!!

I just couldn't stop stuffing my face, sweet things, large sandwiches, ice creams etc. Especially on my own, when people can't see me I would eat a 4 box of magnums one after an other.

My DH can also eat anything but stays very slim, however he has been very supportive and helped me or cooked me loads of yummy meals.

I couldn't just cut back or calorie count...I know it has it critics but the Dukan diet so far is saving me! I love the strict rules and so far I haven't missed eating any food. I am also not so hungry and I am not craving sweet food like I was only 2 weeks ago.

I lost 2kg while on holiday...with family all the time people could see me eating as soon as I came back I started the diet and I have now lost 3.2kg more, so 5.2kg altogether! I have a long way to go 20kg in all but I am determined.

Plus I have started walking the dogs every night for an hour. Walking very very quickly with loads of hills.

Might it suit you too?

Dukan very good if you have a sugar addiction, and the strict rules agree with some people.

My only criticism of dukan is the PP days as not sure how healthy it is BUT I think dukan PV days are perfect/ideal....

Thanks again everyone. I can't afford to join the gym or go to any classes at the moment so the walking the dogs thing is a good idea, i'll get some good tunes on my ipod and get striding out!

Will read about this Dukan thing but to be honest it sounds like the sort of thing i want to avoid at the moment. I don't want to go down the calorie counting route either i just want to develop a healthier attitude to food, stop binge eating and be healthier inside and out as well as a better role model to DD. There have been times lately when i have binge eaten to such an extent and felt so horrible about it that i have considered making myself sick. Not good.

Anyway i resisted the left over desert last night and haven't had any biscuits this morning. I'm just making myself a very late breakfast of egg on toast (one slice) followed by a smoothie.

I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

YES YOU CAN DO THIS

And it shoes how messed up we are about food when a discussion about how you want to eat better but not 'diet' becomes a recommend a dietathon