Anybody wanting to lose weight w/o relighting an eating disorder?

[ToysRLuv]

I am 13.5 stone and 5 foot 6.5, so quite overweight. Need to lose around 2 stone to fir into prepregnancy clothes (wardrobe is full of them). Gained 3 stone from DS (13 months) and have been unable to lose it. Still wearing pregnancy clothes and similar tents (yuck). Have been afraid to relight my past eating disorders (too much or too little) by dieting, so could do with a diet buddy(ies) with similar concerns. My diet downfalls are all sweets, due to always being knackered, and my son's leftovers (fresh bread with butter, anyone? - you just cannot bin that!). My only mode of exercise is pushing the pram (have become so accustomed to it that feel weird when walking without my "zimmer frame").

Anybody out there?

Interesting you've not had a response. I've never suffered with what is recognised as eating disorders but I know I do comfort eat and sweets are also my downfall. I'm doing IPD (even though I really want to get away from the diet idea)and it's slow going. Have not had carbs for 4 weeks now and have lost a grand total of 4lbs :(

Hi ToysRLuv and lickeloo,

I started a thread today (december diet) with the intention of trying to lose some weight without fadding dieting, in time for Christmas. It's probably very old fashioned but I'm planning just to watch what I eat, try to avoid the things I know are bad for me, and move more!

I'm not trying to hijack your thread at all, but if you want to join up we could all help to motivate each other.

I've never thought that I had an eating disorder - but my relationship with food is a bit distorted!

:)

Thanks for your responses, guys, and good luck in losing those pounds! I know eating disorders are a bit of a touchy subject for many. However, I'm quite open about my past problems. It's just hard for me to go on a diet without taking it on a mad level. It's perfection or nothing for me. So far I have been fine (have been watching what I eat for a week - counting calories and trying to stick to 1400-1800) and too tired to even think about living on too little or binging. Comfort eating is still a bit of a problem as I feel quite deprived without my little treats, and have had a few more calories than I planned to. Pushing the buggy in this weather has been sooo hard, though, so have probably burned those.

Anyways, I might well join the december thread. only have realised that I don't have much time for writing, as DS's naps wrecked at the moment (but that's a whole other thread)..

Hi I am same proportions as you TRL. Suffer from disordered eating - mainly comfort eating. Thanks for posting - I'll have a look at December thread too. Determined to slim down now - for health and sick of looking so frumpy x

hi caffe and TRL...
Im in the same boat... and im finding it quite difficult atm... and with xmas fast approaching it wont be any easier
so, you are not alone....
I'll look at the Dec thread too

Interesting thread, ToysRLuv. I joined a class recently, led by someone like Little Britain's FatFighter woman, and it did indeed reignite old issues. In particular I got quite upset because suddenly every food seemed 'bad for me'. You can imagine how that kicked off.

Hi

I'm fighting to resist the urge to just not eat - hard when you know it works, but also know it's a bad idea. And losing weight other ways is so fucking hard.

I don't dare do diets as I know they will feed the urge.

I know. I do now go on semi-fasts, but I follow one set out in a natural health book which I trust.

I heard a feature on Woman's Hour very recently about eating disorders and pregnancy - a pregnant woman who had had eating disorders was speaking, and it was just so real. Of course, Helen in the Archers is dealing with that - also very realistic IMO.

Actually I got v upset about eating when pregnant with ds1. In one consultation, the doc said I was lucky not to have an eating disorder, imagine how I'd feel then. Did not take much imagination on my part.

Seriously?! What a sensitive thing for the doctor to say!

I'm in this boat too I'm afraid. I've gained nearly two stone since giving birth 12 months ago. I've struggled with compulsive eating for nearly 25 years, so this is a big problem for me. Before getting pregnant I was controlling my weight with exercise (running 3 times a week) and was a healthy 9 and a half stone (I'm 5'5"). I am now nearly 12 stone and can't exercise at all because of a pelvic problem caused by the pregnancy. Which would be fine, if I didn't spend all day literally stuffing my face with cakes instead!

I've not started a diet, with the excuse that I'm still breastfeeding, but to be honest, I only feed once or twice a day now and DS is nearly weaned. I think I'm a bit reticent to do so really, although not sure why.

I've suffered from bulemia in the past and have relapses of this from time to time. I wonder if I start dieting this will just make things worse.

Sorry I can't offer any positive thoughts on this, OP, but you are certainly not alone!!

So familiar - can I join too.

Stress is my trigger and has been since I was 15. At times of stress I just can't face food and take comfort in exercise - having a ds with severe ASD means I have to live with stress.

I was on a weightloss thread and had worked so hard to control my loss. I mentioned that I felt I was at my ideal weight but struggle to know due to past food issues and had negative comments about not being appropriate to be on a weightloss thread.

Id like about half a stone off and more tone - I was in really good shape over the summer and really physically fit and I just need to get that back. Christmas will be difficult as my gym time will be very limited once the dc finish school - maybe I will have to try the wii fit!

I wonder if there are weight loss classes which are better than others for people like us. I'm thinking about joining the one at my gym in the New Year.

These days it seems OK to be fairly upfront about eating disorders; you'd think we would just be able to say: I've had problems with eating in the past, I have to be careful not to go crazy with this. Maybe part of the problem is that I don't exactly look (now) like someone who might just stop eating altogether.

Tibni, I find concentrating on the idea of 'more tone', as you say, is quite helpful.

ex-bulimic hate dieting as get very, very, very obsessive
Really need to diet though as topping stone at the moment and need to do something.
Scared shitless that if I do I will start it up again...but need to lose weight.

what to do? Probably a lot more healthy to be overweight (4 stone by the way) and not bulimic than the other way around? I don't know.

I may follow this. Not sure as its a really tough one for me and not something I really talk about.

There should be classes which can accommodate our needs, though, shouldn't there? I would have thought that many, many overweight women have had some kind of eating disorder in the past.

I've done classes before, of variable help. One of the things I found was that I needed recognition that just getting through the week without going off the rails food-wise was an achievement.

I got fed up with being told off for not losing weight when it seemed to me to be better to stay the same weight than go crazy. I also felt like saying: if you want to see weight loss, I can show you weight loss, mate.

Frenchdesign "I can show you weightloss mate".

I was brave and got on the gym scales and don't have the amount of weight I thought I needed to lose - shows what a screwed up view I have. But I have to admit I have been a little off track and been a little more restricted than I should.

But on the positive side I restricted my cardio to 30mins and concentrated on some weights and tone work rather than watching the calorie count on the cardio machines.

frenchdesign - would a "normal" classe not be better, id be worried about feeling encouraged by other people failure to be normal iykwim
for ex, if someone (failed to be healthy) and said they lost through restricting or that another one said they lost through purging i might be triggered...
whereas in a normal classe, if all the talk is about healthy eating then i might put my issues on the side more easily?

thats only me though and it might be diffren,et for different people and at different stage of their relationship with food...

my eating is so screwed that i dont think ill ever be able to follow a plan though... healthy eating, one day at a time and regular exercise is my best bet

I really don't know what the answer is in regard to managed weightloss.

I have gone down the exercise and fitness route and most the time that works for me. At my gym you can use the pool of trainers to put a programme in, monitor etc and I tend to stay with one I trust and have been honest about my past with him. I am aware that my problems are triggered by stress and I tend to recognise the warning signs in relation to my eating and now will confide in a few close people, this has stopped things escalating for me over the last few years.

I tried the food focus site but it bought out all the wrong feelings in me and had to stop using it. Theoretically it is great because it shows you if you are under calorie target, if you are lacking protein etc but that wasn't good for my mentality.

Can I put a word in for Seth Roberts Shangri La Diet?

Basically a scientist worked out that if you take in some flavour free calories (either by a couple of tablespoons of flavourless oil, or by sugar water, or by normal food eaten with a nose clip) in the middle of a 2 hour flavour free window, your internal set point lowers and you experience appetite suppression.

Something to with the role of flavour on appetite evolutionarily apparently.

Google his blog and forums - it is really informative.

Whenever I tell people about it they think I am mad, but it DOES work. Especially speaking as someone who has experienced disordered eating.

For me the benefit is in the detachment from the food/denial/reward thing.

The appetite suppression is not like the kind you might get from a drug or from fasting. You do not feel virtuous and high. You just forget about food, until you need to eat, then you see the food as fuel/nutrition.

Thats why it is called Shangri La, because you just eat normally but you end up eating less.

In fact, the only problem I have with it is I will often stop taking the flavour free calories because I want to feel like bingeing :(

Well, you can take a horse to water...

Hello!

I've joined Mumsnet after having stumbled across this thread (erm, I'm not a mother...but I have been pregnant before, so hope it's ok that I gatecrash!)

I've often thought about how my previous 'disordered eating' has affected my body image, attempts at stabilising my present weight etc etc.

I was a little chubby as a child and then freaking blew up when I was 15-ish. I was about, at 5'7, 82kg or 13 stone and had given up competitive swimming...just not the diet [ahem, eat all you can buffet lifestyle] that went with it. After 'subtle' family digs and whatnot, I finally got with the programme and stopped stuffing my face with crap at 3am.

I dieted sensibly in the summer of 2004 and by the time Jan 2005 rolled around, I was down to 63kg (10 stone). However, I hovered around the low 60s for about a year and then got something in my head and my weight dropped to 51kg (8 stone). I stopped having periods at 55-6kgs (just under 9 stone).

So, forever after that I have fluctuated between 56-63 kgs. I can put on a stone in a week but lose it just as quickly. Every time I tell myself to get to a happy, content weight, I freak out and basically crash diet. Inevitably, the weight gain is rapid. It's now a constant yo-yo. The DP understandably gets irked at my self-frustration and hatred. I haven't been 'on top' for about forever...I tell myself it's for his own good - my flapping bum-bag of stomach flab bashing him in the face probably wouldn't be that great.

I've been meaning to finally sort this problem out once and for all. Also, I think quasi-body dysmorphia doesn't really help - in other words, I just think I'm always fat...leading to demotivation etc etc.

So, I realise this thread has been a little quiet lately but am ready and willing when anyone else is. I have no problem discussing past food issues - I am the classic binge-and-starve kind so, over-eaters/compulsive eaters, I can relate.

[Getting back on the wagon as of tomorrow. Past 2 days = binge-fest]