I am so fed up and am struggling

[washinglinespider]

I am 5foot4 and 12.5 stone, I used to be so slim and its just crept up and up every year. DP is in the army and away alot, we have been ttc but so far nothing, obviously made harder by him being away.

My problem is in the evening, I feel so lonely and down that I eat and eat. Well anytime I am alone really. I am a childminder and have no children today until after school and have just eaten 1/4 of a cheese cake, had to pour salt on the rest to stop me eating it. So a huge waste of money as well.

I need to stop this, I am getting bigger and thats not helping with the ttc. My friends all have children and are usually busy with them in evenings/weekends. I am just so lonely. I do some voluntary work at weekends but apart fromt hat I sit and eat and watch TV.

I over eat so much, I feel my willpower is rubbish, and that makes me feel greedy and disgusting. I dont know where to start. :(

Be kind to yourself - you have a tiring job, are lonely in the evenings with OH away and clearly find comfort in food. So, its understandable that you're feeling down. So what can you do to make you feel positive about things

• join a slimming group, like WW or Slimming World. Will help you re-educate yourself on diet and nutrition, hopefully make new friends (so new company) and inspire you to lose weight and keep at it

• try taking up some exercise in the evenings or if too tired then at weekends. Start with walking - maybe see if there are local walking groups you could join (exercise and company - two birds, one stone)

• dont buy the foods you binge on - fill up oon fruit instead. If you dont have the cheesecake to hand when temptation hits, you cant give in.

And you will do it. And as you lose weight and get fitter, hopefully you'll also get some success on the ttc front. Good luck.

Thanks. My first thought was oh good its friday night, what can I eat while I watch TV!

I really feel your despair!
I feel the same way about being overweight.

Do you have a dessert after dinner?

I find that if I have a planned (low fat etc) dessert after dinner, I don't feel the need to snack all evening.

I also second the idea of exercising in the evening. Try a 1/2hr dvd. You'll feel really good and energised.

(My dh used to work very long hrs and I had to try to get out of that veg on the sofa and snack all eve habit)

How about doing a course for pleasure to get you out of the house and occupy your evenings?

Why not join weight watchers, it may give you motivation.

As you are on your own and have a lot of spare time it should make it easier for you. Join an exercise or dance class, what ever you enjoy.

As you are only buying food for your self a lot of the time don't buy what you feel you should not eat.

I found being away from my DH very motivating, as I could make changes and every time I came home he would see a change.

I know you wont think so, but it will actually never be easier for you, once you have that DCs and less free time it will only get harder.

Post when you are about to binge and MN will talk you out of it.

Good luck

Are you crafty at all? A friend swears by knitting in the evenings - she says it keeps her hands busy and stops her thinking about grabbing a snack.

Try the Paul Mckenna I Can Make You THin books and CDs they are really helpful; you haven't much to loose Also agree with the OPs

Don't buy crap.If it isn't in the house, you can't eat it.

we all overeat, thats how we got fat

but you have a choice, you can decide to sit and eat oryou can go for a walk/doa dvd/go to the gym/see a friend - all doable if you havent got dc or a dp about

kwym about sitting and eating, im a nanny and some evenings im knackered and just wants stodge BUT i go to the gym then eat tea and i always have a treat EVERY night to keep me going thro the day

i do ww at home and always keep 3 points spare a day

i have a packet of crisps, often pickled onion monster munch and a square or 2 of dark choco and thats 3p treat which stops me eating crap all day

i lost 4 stone low carbing. there is an introduction to it with some easy recipes and an explaination as to how it works on my MN blog - click my name and click on link to blog

there are many threads on here with all trying to lose weight

our bunch is lovely, come and join and we all motivate each other

I went swimming tonight for the 1st time in months, enjoyed it but was abpout how slow I was, got chatting to a lady who had fractured her back and was there to build up strength. I though if shes been through that and is here then I can keep going. Had some cereal before I went and some toast with bolagnase on top when home. Don't feel hungry or want to binge eat so am pleased today. :)

well done on going swimming, its exercise and gets you out of the house so no nibbling