Has anyone had Dad at wedding but playing no role?

It's a second wedding, surely you can dispense with being 'given away'?

By all means ask your mum to make a speech.

My SIL had a slightly strained relationship with her dad. He had been unfaithful to her mum for many years then eventually went off with the OW when she was an adult.

He was there at the wedding but didn't walk her down the aisle - SIL and BIL walked in together, which read lovely. Her sister gave a speech in the place of a father of the bride speech which read very funny.

Main thing was that she talked to him well ahead of time and was very clear about her expectations.

I think that would be lovely for your mum to give you away. I wish I had done that for my wedding

My friend had her mum give her away. Another friend had her stepdad. Both times the biological father was at the wedding.

My dad was at my wedding but didn't walk me down the aisle; my brother did.

My stepmom and step siblings were there too.

It was all fine.

My dad understood why I didn't ask him to walk me down, so it was a drama free day. Hasn't changed the dynamic of our relationship.

My friend walked down the aisle with her mother but let her father do a speech when he was upset about not walking her down the aisle.

She wishes he had played no role though as she feels she only agreed to the speech to make him feel better and he has been a combination of an absent father and an emotionally abusive one.

And it is unfair to dismiss the PP out of hand for saying that as it is a second wedding, you have more freedom from convention. That is true and should help to alleviate the pressure and even gives you a chance to turn it into a given ‘oh dad, you got the first wedding, it is only fair it is mum’s turn this time - it is 2023!’

Yes, I walked down the aisle with DH, there was no 'giving away'. No-one was offended or mentioned it at all to me in anyway.

It’s what I did. My husband and I walked down the aisle together, because we’re both fully grown adults 🤣

Both my parents were at my wedding but I walked down the aisle myself - I don't see myself as a possession to be 'given away' so never countenanced the thought that I would ask my dad to do so.

My sister had our Mum walk her down the aisle and give a speech at her first wedding. Dad and his wife were invited for the full day as guests but they chose to only come for the ceremony/pictures and left before the speeches. Sis was totally fine with that and everyone was happy.
She's having her second wedding abroad and has asked my Mum's partner to walk her down the aisle...I'm not sure if our Dad will be invited this time as communications have dwindled to pretty much nothing, we tend to only see him at funerals.

I would ask your mum.. Like you said, it's your wedding, and it sounds like a lovely gesture. My dad refused to walk me down the ailse, so I asked my brother to do it, and he was honoured.

Not sure if this is relevant as my dad died about a year before my wedding, but I had my mum walk me down the aisle and do a speech, and I’m so pleased I did.

I would have done the same had my dad been alive and invited to the wedding (unlikely) and if he had complained I’d have stayed firm and told him either quietly accept it or don’t come.

It’s your wedding. Don’t do anything to appease anyone else, especially not your dad.

I have been to a few weddings recently, none of them had the dad walking down the aisle. It was a mix of mum and dad walking the bride down, groom and bride together and bride and mum together.

For my second wedding I walked down the aisle with my mum and daughter, my dad was there but we had been estranged previously and it felt right.

Do it your way and have a wonderful wedding day.

I am organising my second wedding and this time I am getting my nephew to walk me down the aisle. He is 11 and is so excited about it! I spoje to my Dad and told him my plans and he was absolutely fine with it! "Giving Away" is a weird thing anyway ... he technically passed ownership of me to my first husband when he gave me away the first time. No-one "owns" me now I'm divorced so I'll walk down the aisle with whoever I like!!

My dad attended as a guest like any other . My mom gave me away and read a speech.

I went to a wedding where dad was invited with his partner and it was horrible.

sat them at the very back, excluded him from every photo, mum and brides parents at the top table. Long gushing speeches about how much mum and grandparents had done for the groom, no mention of dad at all. No acknowledgment he was even there.

better to not have invited him at all IMO.

I have a stepdad who has been in my life since I was 5. I honestly spend more od my childhood w him than either of my parents.

When I married my biological father walked me down the aisle and my stepdad did the welcome before the meal. This meant he had a significant role but not one that was lengthy.

Would that work?

I should say my parents got on well and all were at head table including stepdad and then stepmun who were sat together and had a great time.

My dad told me he didn't want to walk me down the aisle or do a speech but he was there. My mum walked me down and I gave a speech. As your dad has already done it I think anyone would simply see it as recognising your mum and giving her that opportunity this time.

I walked in with the groom (we also did our couples photos together before the wedding) and my dad didn’t do a speech - no falling out, just didn’t fancy being given away and wanted minimal speeches.

Not me but my cousin did, my dad (so her uncle) walked her down the aisle and made a speech. Her dad and his partner were there but just as guests basically. Then she didn't bother with a top table to deal with that side of things, it wasn't a traditional wedding venue though so having just round tables didn't look particularly out of place.