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Pregnant Bridesmaid

9 replies

Becky2303 · 13/05/2025 14:59

I’m getting married end of Nov and was having just my best friend by my side as maid of honour/Bridesmaid. I’m made up for her but she’s just told me she’s pregnant and it’s due the week of the wedding. I hope I didn’t show it to her but I’m devastated she may not make it to the wedding, we were working out how we would navigate it all logistics and things and We were thinking of the 3 different scenarios, she’s heavily pregnant and there, there with a tiny tiny baby all completely fine to me or not there in labour/in hospital not up to it. I no what type of person she is, she’s a people pleaser (as am I) and always pulls herself in every direction so I said to her if she wanted to for her own well being and the baby’s take the maid honour/bridesmaid things off the table and come just as a guest if she could and wanted too. She’s said she things that would be best.
I genuinely want the best for her but at the same time I’m completely devastated the day will not be the same without her and I pray she will be there one way or another I’m just so worried/ upset that she won’t be.
I feel horrible for feeling like this and selfish and I will get over it but I don’t no how to look forward to it now, I no I will but right now I just want to postpone or bring it forward. She means the world to me.

I also don’t no what to do now go at it alone (has anyone done this) or ask someone else however there’s not really anyone else I want.

OP posts:
TryingToStayAwake88 · 13/05/2025 15:03

Could you not keep her in the wedding but make sure nothing would go wrong if she wasn't able to come? That way she may well be able to come but she won't feel pressure to pull out if she needs to.

ExistentialThreat · 13/05/2025 15:06

Absolutely. Find her a role that is important but equally not vital. She could for example, raise a toast to you at the meal. She could also wear something that shows her as part of the bridal party, e.g. a buttonhole, but that doesn't require a full bridesmaid get up.

Coldcourgette · 13/05/2025 15:10

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Becky2303 · 13/05/2025 15:11

Yes absolutely I can do that but honestly she doesn’t have to do anything il just be made up if she’s there in some capacity. I didn’t have any jobs or anything anyway I’m not like that. I’m just worried upset it won’t be the same for me if she’s not there. Xx

OP posts:
Compresschill · 13/05/2025 15:18

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Becky2303 · 13/05/2025 15:20

Exactly that and I no that’s why I’ve said everything and given her the choice and tell her it’s ok.

I was looking for some support that I’m not being silly for being sad but clearly I am

OP posts:
eyeswide21 · 13/05/2025 15:22

You sound like a lovely friend, that's upset for all the right reasons.
I agree with other posters, that let her be involved as much as she feels able - but not with jobs or roles that you're relying on, in case she can't do it.
If she ends up not being there then you'll still have the best day - it's your wedding!

Compresschill · 13/05/2025 15:22

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Becky2303 · 13/05/2025 15:25

Sorry I’m being ultra sensitive

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