Sorry now for the enormous lengthy post I just need to get it all off my chest somehow.
Partner and I got engaged in Sept 23 so 18months ago and had our heart set on an Edinburgh wedding as its somewhere we both love and is special to us.
We got engaged abroad, so when we got home my parents sat us down and said we'd like to contribute £10k. This was never asked for or expected but was very grateful, we were mid renovation of our house so money was a little tight.
We set about viewing venues in Scotland and was met with alot of negative comments from my family and the cost. We were happy to pay whatever above the 10k and keep it small and immediate family only.
So we looked closer to home to and booked a venue for a 2025 wedding (nearly 2 years after the proposal).
In this time we found out we were expecting, so realistically we decided last March to sell our house and get a new build, this didn't go to plan and were still waiting to move (hopefully in the next few weeks). To add to the stress I was then made redundant 7 weeks before my Maternity leave was about to start, luckily they agreed to pay my Maternity Leave. But because our house has taken so long to complete I had to return to work early (after 5 months) as I am the higher earner, and OH had only just stayed a new job and wasn't entitled to any Paternity or Shared leave. This has caused quite a lot of stress!
My dad unexpectedly had been quite poorly this year, which has impacted them financially and asked if he could halve the contribution. We said that's fine we will pick up the cost as the house should release some equity.
Except now it's realistically looking to be a small contribution if any. Now this is where I'm getting sick to death of family and wish we had stuck to our guns and gone with what we initially wanted.
My sister is continously guilt tripping me about the money and says I should do the right thing and say they don't need to pay anything. Has whinged about me having a hen do, has said she's not got time for MOH but then proceeded to plan the hen do in Majorca, moaned about the cost profusely and then said she can't afford a holiday and split up with her OH for the 4th time.
I have told my mum we will cover the cost and not to worry, but neither mum or dad have raised the subject with me, I only hear it from my sister that they're embarrassed to say they can't afford it, having never been stuck for money before.
Unfortunately this all surfaced after I'd sent the invites and deposits etc had been paid (by ourselves) we have discussed pushing it back or just cancelling but I don't think our insurance would cover us for this.
I obviously get defensive as I feel I'm constantly being told what I should and shouldn't do and made to feel like crap.
We may also need to chain break due to the Stamp duty increases and our new house not being ready in time, so suggested a holiday, which then my sister also said I shouldn't be rubbing it in when others are struggling. Like ffs we will be homeless why cant we have a week of sun?
OH is also annoyed no one has spoken to us directly about any of this.
But I now feel like it's all my fault and maybe just cancel it all.