Hen do financial set-up - how to split this?

[weimar123]

Currently organising a hen do - quite far in advance but want to get ahead of the curve as everyone is busy and calendars get filled up quickly.

One bridesmaid won't be able to confirm her attendance until a few weeks before the hen do, as opposed to others who are booking now. This is 100% legitimate and out of her control due to the nature of her job. We are getting an airbnb to share, so accommodating her last-minute shouldn't be an issue - haven't booked yet but presumably there will be an extra bed or a sofa somewhere...

However, I'm wondering how we split the costs. She's a work friend so is not close to any of the other girls (and hasn't even met two of them) so I don't want people to feel like the cost of their accommodation is dependent on a stranger's job.

I was thinking, calculate the cost as if she's not attending and then it's a "bonus" if the price goes down if she does come? But how to best communicate this in the WhatsApp chat etc.? Has anyone else had this issue?

Just give the price. If a bonus reduction comes deal with it then.

I think if someone is coming along last minute and sleeping on a put up bed or sofa, I wouldn't expect them to share in the accommodation price significantly.

I was thinking, calculate the cost as if she's not attending and then it's a "bonus" if the price goes down if she does come?

Yes, I would do this.
Also, don't pay anything until everyone has paid.

Just pick an appropriate place for the group without her and say that hopefully there might be one extra and ‘Sally’ might make it but if so she’ll sleep in the sofa bed / airbed / she’ll share with you etc.

Split between the definites then if the extra can attend maybe she buys some booze?

@ExitPursuedByABare I like this idea!

As we haven't gone firm on the accommodation quite yet, we're not sure if it'll be a sofa/camp bed or a proper bed/room left over for her...

So I'm thinking: if it's an actual room, just give the price without her, and it's a bonus reduction if she comes. If it's a camp bed/sofa bed, she can buy some extra booze instead as it would be unfair to contribute significantly as @Longdueachange pointed out.

I think you can't really make allowances for folk who may or may not come even if its outside their control. If she wants to come she needs to pay a share now of tne accommodation. Otherwise it will just cause bad feeling and discontent.

In a similar situation we split the cost between the people who confirmed attendance, then when the other person did manage to come they contributed the same amount and it was used to buy shared food / drinks.

@HopeAndStrength nice idea, thank you.

Split the cost of the accommodation on the basis that she's not coming. Then nearer the time if she does come, have her pay what the others have paid towards the accommodation towards something else (a meal, for example) before splitting the rest of the cost between everyone.

Don't pay upfront for anything without getting people's money first.

Will you need a bigger/more expensive house if she comes? As if you do then I wouldn’t expect others to pay more so you can book a room that she may not use

I'd also add that it's very likely that at least one person will drop out at some point. So you may find it is helpful if she decides to come at the last minute and replaces someone who can no longer come.

This is what we’re done before too, if you’re staying at a self catering place you’ll need food/snacks/drinks etc so the extra person’s money covered that and the first round of drinks when we went out.