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Original poster

Do I get the couple a gift if invited to just the service?

10 replies

DraftPunk · 20/09/2023 20:17

Just that really. I have accepted an invitation to a wedding service in a couple of months - the groom is a work acquaintance whom I wish well and happy rather than a close friend. There is a small reception afterwards to which I’m not invited - fine.

But is a card and a bottle of something enough in this scenario? Or is that tight? There was no gift list information or anything in the invitation. Young couple and first marriage if that makes any difference.

OP posts:
Ohambassador · 20/09/2023 20:23

I wouldn’t bother going for a work acquaintance, especially if it’s just for the 40 odd minute ceremony

and given it’s a small wedding - I’m baffled they even invited a work acquaintance!

MaggieFS · 20/09/2023 20:58

I probably wouldn't go, but a nice bottle would be perfect if you do.

Positive41 · 20/09/2023 20:58

I wouldn't go either. It is weird just inviting someone to a free church and expecting them to make the effort but sod off for the meal.

If you do go, I would just give a card. No gift.

xyz111 · 20/09/2023 21:16

I think it's weird. I would never invite someone to the ceremony but not to the reception. How odd.

Redglitter · 20/09/2023 21:18

I've never heard of anyone inviting guests to the ceremony & nothing else. Sounds a bit grabby.

I wouldn't bother either going or sending a present quite honestly

UsingChangeofName · 29/09/2023 22:47

I've never heard of anyone inviting guests to the ceremony & nothing else. Sounds a bit grabby.

How's it grabby ? Confused They aren't asking for anything.

OP, no, there is no expectation to take a present.
I mean, everywhere I have worked, if someone were getting married, we'd have had a collection and bought a present from colleagues, but when people say that people are welcome to join the service at the Church, there is no expectation that anyone who wants to share in the service to bring a present.

Wolvesart · 29/09/2023 22:54

Being invited to the wedding is special. If you go buy a present

LoveBluey · 29/09/2023 23:37

How can it be grabby if they haven't included a gift list?
It's a bit unusual as weddings are typically a whole day occasion but plenty of people on MN seem to object to being made to go to a an all day event and all that entails so there's nothing wrong in principle with just inviting people to the ceremony.

But no I don't think you need a gift beyond a card and a bottle.

Maddy70 · 30/09/2023 00:06

Yes. But not a huge one

Dnendns · 02/10/2023 20:11

LoveBluey · 29/09/2023 23:37

How can it be grabby if they haven't included a gift list?
It's a bit unusual as weddings are typically a whole day occasion but plenty of people on MN seem to object to being made to go to a an all day event and all that entails so there's nothing wrong in principle with just inviting people to the ceremony.

But no I don't think you need a gift beyond a card and a bottle.

people don’t include a gift list as they want cash, not a present.

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