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Original poster

Do we need Canapes?

30 replies

TheGoodBanana · 15/08/2023 16:46

We have our wedding ceremony at 3.30pm, the venue is approximately 40 of travel for most of our guests. The ceremony and wedding breakfast is in the same venue and wedding breakfast will be served between 5.30-5.45

The bridesmaids will be provided with sandwiches and fruit platters and crisps during the getting ready period, we are getting ready at the venue.

We haven't arranged canapes on the basis that people will be able to have lunch at the normal time and then dinner relatively early but I am worried that people will be hungry?

OP posts:
Huckleberries73 · 15/08/2023 16:48

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Fotophrame · 15/08/2023 16:48

It's better to offer something between the ceremony and the wedding breakfast, otherwise guests are just drinking and waiting.

pilates · 15/08/2023 16:49

Yes I would

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 15/08/2023 16:49

Nah don't bother. People don't need to be eating at that time. They can have normal meals throughout the day

Marmite27 · 15/08/2023 16:50

I wouldn’t bother with that time frame tbh, but this is mumsnet, if you’re not feeding your guests every 10 minute they’ll say you’re doing it wrong!

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 15/08/2023 16:51

Make sure you and the bridal party do eat your platters mind!

Cowlover89 · 15/08/2023 16:51

I would

Lyricallie · 15/08/2023 16:52

So I got married recently and we had food for bridesmaids and myself and we hardly ate anything. Too busy getting ready and worried about marking dresses and ruining make up. We had canapés and made sure there was a plate of them kept aside for the bridesmaids otherwise they end up not getting anything due to getting pictures taken during canapé time.

Original poster
TheGoodBanana · 15/08/2023 16:52

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 15/08/2023 16:51

Make sure you and the bridal party do eat your platters mind!

I definitely will, I was a bridesmaid a couple of years ago and had to be there at 8.00am to get ready, not a scrap of food in sight, I thought I would pass out by the time the canapes came round at 3pm!

OP posts:
TheFlis12345 · 15/08/2023 16:54

If you can afford it I would. Most people will have had an early lunch before getting ready and travelling so will start getting hungry after a drink or 2.

Friggingfrog · 15/08/2023 16:54

You don’t need them with those times

Lindy2 · 15/08/2023 16:54

I wouldn't expect canapés after a 3.30pm wedding. As you say, guests will have had lunch so should be fine until the dinner is served.

Huckleberries73 · 15/08/2023 16:56

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Original poster
TheGoodBanana · 15/08/2023 16:58

It's pretty close so far between yes and no. I thought yes, DP thinks No.

OP posts:
Ohmylovejune · 15/08/2023 17:02

Depends on the cost really.

It's "something to do" whilst the photographs are being taken and it's nice to have nibbles to eat with drinks, and I'm sure your guests will be filling the time before the main meal with a drink at the bar.

However, it's definitely an area you can cut back on if it doesn't fit your budget.

mosiacmaker · 15/08/2023 17:03

I would just do it as long as you can afford it. Some guests might have forgotten to eat before. Do you really want to go to all the trouble to organise a wedding, scrimp on the canapés and then everyone remember your wedding as the one where they were hungry?

Even if you can’t afford proper canapés you could still have a table of crisps and some nice olives or something just in case you have hungry people.

You might have some delays with wedding breakfast etc as well and don’t want miserable hungry guests.

Ohmylovejune · 15/08/2023 17:06

What PP says. If the canapés are expensive ask for bowls of crisps and olives to be on the bar for people to take when they are buying their drinks. Then they have something if they need it.

And make sure your bridesmaids and you eat the sandwiches and fruit!! It's easy for nerves and general.busy-ness to get in the way and you all.end up starving after the ceremony.

whathappenedtosummer23 · 15/08/2023 17:08

He’s you do. I don’t recall ever going to a wedding without them. They’re part of the reception

Ostryga · 15/08/2023 17:16

I would just stick some olives and maybe some nice sliced bread out on a platter near the drinks. Then if anyone does want to eat they can, and won’t cost much at all.

FlySwimmer · 15/08/2023 17:21

I would say on balance yes. Not too many given the timings, but it’s nice to offer people something with drinks while photos etc. are being taken.

Also, how are you organising speeches during the breakfast? If you’re planning to do them all at the start, then that will mean an even longer wait before people actually eat. I’ve been to a few weddings where, while we sat down at the table around 5.30, it was easily between 6.30 and 7 before food actually appeared due to speeches! In that scenario some canapés before would definitely have been welcome…

Dodgygeezer · 15/08/2023 17:25

No one ever sits down on time for their wedding breakfast do they.

I think it would be hospitable to have something. Good canapés and a nice glass of fizz is a wedding highlight for me

Original poster
TheGoodBanana · 15/08/2023 17:44

I think it's a definite yes then, I wouldn't want anyone to be hungry.

I am slightly worried about the wedding breakfast being delayed, does this really happen often?

We have evening guests (about 15 of them) arriving at 8pm so can't really have the wedding breakfast running over by much. I didn't realise this was common.

As for speeches, we are only having two, my FIL and the groom. The groom will keep his short definitely but I know FIL likes to hold forth so yes I think canapés might be needed!

OP posts:
CelebrateAndDream · 15/08/2023 17:51

Think about timings for everyone properly OP! You 'say' travel is approximately 40 minutes for most people' and your ceremony is at 3.30. So some guests will be coming further.

As a wedding event professional, here is my take on this (so do with this observation what you will 🤷‍♀️)

The very vast majority of your guests will be arriving at your venue by around 3pm...some even earlier if they are wanting to get 'good seats' or have further to travel, or have anxieties over parking and driving (allowing themselves 'extra time') so they'll be leaving home I'd say around between 1/1:30.

Prior to this, they'll be 'getting ready', which as you know is no mean feat for a wedding! 'Lunch' will not be anything substantial! They may have a quick sandwich very early on...but by the time your ceremony is over, they will be ready for something. The norm at these events is for canapés and drinks to be served whilst the bridal party go off for photos...the wedding breakfast is ALWAYS delayed as photos ALWAYS take much longer than your photographer tells you they will take!

So no...you don't have to provide canapés for your guests if money is tight...but if it was me, I'd prefer to cut down on either my guest numbers so that I could afford to feed the ones I was inviting, or cut down on other things that are less important (flowers, table decorations, 'frivolities') rather than letting guests feel uncomfortable 🤷‍♀️

TropicalTrama · 15/08/2023 18:04

I would. Never been to a wedding that hasn’t had them, regardless of budget, venue or size so I think they’ll be expected. Also, ceremony finishes at what 4pm? 1.5 hours, which is optimistic as so many weddings run late, just standing around drinking when people might not have had much for lunch given timings isn’t great when there’s no nibbles on offer. Keep everyone fed and happy would be my top priority so if I needed to trim budget I’d be looking elsewhere namely stuff like flowers, table decorations, favours etc.

Original poster
TheGoodBanana · 15/08/2023 18:10

@CelebrateAndDream you make very good points about people arriving early and leaving time to park and what not.

I think in our heads we had gone on ceremony 3.30, 40 mins travel that's 2.50 that leaves loads of time for lunch.

But it's not that simple I suppose. I will definitely push harder on the canapés. It's not a budget issue, DP just didn't think they were necessary given the timings.

OP posts: