Wedding Gift / Money

[Sunseekingmum]

I have been invited to a friends wedding later in the year, and to be honest it’s been years since I went to a wedding. The lovely couple (a friend of mine of a few years) have requested money towards honeymoon instead of gifts, which a lot of people do nowadays. I was just wondering how much money do people normally give as a gift? Im anxious that I won’t be able to be giving as much as others (the couple do not have kids and have much more disposable income than we do). Should I buy a gift instead? If so, any gift ideas? Couple already have house, live together etc. Any ideas welcome! 😊

For friends we do £30 if just one of us is invited, £50 as a couple but I wouldn't fret if you can't stretch that far!

Honesty depending how well you know them, anything from £50-100+. Don't put more than you can afford in, no good friends would be bothered by an amount at all! Im sure they'd be appreciative of any amount.

I wouldn't buy them a gift if they've specifically asked not for them, especially if they already live together etc.

They've specifically asked for a certain type of gift. Whatever your budget, isn't it best to spend that on something they want than something they don't want or need. I'm not sure what their disposable income has to do with it at all?

Don’t buy a gift - that’s just a waste of money when they’ve specifically asked you not to.

Also don’t stretch yourself - as PP says, no good friend will want you to do that.

Id give whatever you’d spend on a gift, and whether that’s £10 or £100 that’s fine.

Don’t give a gift if they’ve asked for money unless you just want to give a bottle of champagne.

If you’ve been given a whole day invitation for yourself and a partner, I’d say give £50-80.

Give what you can afford, don't overstretch yourself, particularly not if they're better off than you.

We usually give 150 quid, but if we didn't have the money, I'd have no qualms giving less.

We’re going to a wedding in a few weeks and are going to give £50.

Thank you all 😊Really helpful advice 😊

We got married recently and were amazed that the going rate seems to have gone up to £50pp/£100 per couple. Everyone was very generous. In saying that, a few couples gave a lot less but we're aware their circumstances maybe aren't as fortunate and it was just appreciated that they gave anything. The only couple who raised eyebrows didn't give anything. I'm reluctant to say that as I'm expecting people to pile on saying you shouldn't expect anything etc and I'm aware of that, but it did feel like a snub. £10 in a card or a bottle of wine would have been appreciated. If they've not asked for gifts I wouldn't bother trying, it's just something else for people to store when they already have matching coffee cups/glasses/chopping boards etc. A lovely thought but in reality a bit of a pest cos sentimentally the couple now have to keep them forever! Unless you get something edible/perishable like wine.

£30 for one person and £50 as a couple is normal in my recent experience of numerous weddings

In our family/friends circle it's £100 per couple. So if you go alone just stick £50. But with the COL just give what you can x

Just ignore what you think anyone else is giving. Give what you want. Or perhaps the money in the Currency of their destination with "have a drink on me" written in it.

I give £100. But think less is absolutely acceptable.. it's a gift, not a requirement. My friends tell me £100 is stingy these days, but I think it's a nice gift. I'd personally be mortified if someone gave me more than that.
You could get them a token gift, luggage labels or passport covers perhaps for honeymoon? But, they've asked for money so I'd probably go with that. Or a bottle of champagne with a cash note stuck to it?
Don't worry too much.. whatever you decide is fine!

The last wedding I went to I gave £75 but it was a close friend. I was always told that your gift should roughly cover what the couple will have spent on your meal, granted unless you know the venue very well that can be hard to guess. That may also be an old fashioned idea, I know it's what my mum always said.

I can't stand this idea that you have to cover what they have decided to pay for a meal! I give the same amount whether I'm going to a posh wedding that's cost hundreds per person or a relaxed affair where you get a sandwich! It's irrelevant to me, when giving the gift, how much they have opted to spend on food!

This! We’ve got to go to a wedding tomorrow, which is why I’m here now figuring out how much to put in a card. My bf says well they’ve had to hire a suit for me ( he’s an usher) and pay for our meals so we need to cover that🤦🏼‍♀️ That was their choice- no one told them to get married. Honestly so weird. Can you tell I don’t want to go?

I know! It really, really bothers me. If anything, we should be giving more money to the couple who spend less, because maybe they need it!
I once went to a wedding that was £400 per person- by this standard I would have needed to give them a grand!
But, did you end up having a lovely time?

My partner and I normally give £50 total to cover both of us. I would hope that all couples who request money just appreciate whatever amount they receive. They will know your circumstances as well, so if you need to give a smaller amount they should understand why.