My mum didn’t seem happy about my engagement

[OatMilkLattes]

A few months ago, I got engaged.

We FaceTimed my mum (we were abroad at the time) and told her. She was happy for us but just didn’t seem THAT happy.

When we got home, we had lots of lovely cards. I didn’t expect anything but it was lovely and I’m going to keep each and every one as a memory.

My mum said to me ‘I’m not going to bother sending you a card now, you’ve had your time’. I don’t know why but it upset me. It’s fine she didn’t send a card (although, it would have been nice!!!) but I just don’t think she needed to say that.

It’s been playing on my mind ever since. She’s also made no effort to see me since and cancelled our plans to see each other a few weeks ago.

She adores DP so unsure why she’s being like this. Help!

My Mum is the EXACT same. I'm not sure if it's because she's generally lacking in enthusiasm, if other stresses are getting to her or if because her wedding was a bit of a shitshow back in the day, there's a degree of resentment coming through.

I'm well into the wedding planning phase now and she has got a bit better, but she hasn't gotten involved with anything and just seems to just nod along when I tell her how things are going. She didn't come to pick my dress with me and isn't coming to the hen party.

I've basically given up now and just letting her get on with it. Best thing you can do is focus on you and your fiancé and not let someone else's attitude ruin your moment because you only get engaged once (hopefully!)

Congratulations btw!

When my ex husband and l got engaged, my mother was like that. Almost to the point of being confrontational about it.
She loved my partner, we'd been together 3 years and had just bought our first house.
When we went to tell them we were getting married, she didn't even look at my ring, which really upset me. And l wasn't a serial fiancee, this was my first engagement and l was 28.
She didn't take any interest in the wedding, either. Besides complaining about everything we decided on, the venue, the reception, the evening do, etc.
I don't know why they do this. Maybe they're not that interested, but surely if it's your own daughter and she's happy, you'd show some interest? It bemused me. It still does.

How horrible of her. I hope when my kids are older I don’t go weird and treat them like this.

Please don't let this upset you. It seems that your DM either has some issues about her own Wedding or about you getting married. Either way, it's not your problem.

Enjoy your Wedding planning and keep posting to tell us what you've got planned