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Would you wait another year for your ideal venue?

13 replies

Flymeaway4 · 18/09/2022 02:22

Would really like to get married at Christmaa and have been looking at venues with availability in December 2023. Had crossed one venue off the list, as it wasn't available over those dstes (it's clearly very popular, as they're fully booked for 2023!).

They recently had a wedding fair, so we went along and we both love it, it could be perfect! But having that venue means waiting an extra year, which I desperately didn't want to do. Been engaged 2 years already and I'm getting worried elderly guests might no longer be around then. Also worried I'll be getting a bit too 'old' to feel bridal, pushing closer to 40 (38 as opposed to 37). Maybe that's silly?!

So, I guess what I'm asking for is advice on whether it's worth it to wait for the perfect venue, given all the above? Or would you compromise on date (Feb/March 2024 maybe) or venue?

OP posts:
Adultchildofelderlyparents · 18/09/2022 02:29

It's very easy to focus on making the day "perfect", when really, whatever happens/wherever you are/whatever you hair is done like/whatever you eat/etc, it will be perfect. For me, the marriage and the vows exchanged is so much more important than the venue. (Why not find somewhere that can fit you in this Christmas?)

Weenurse · 18/09/2022 02:34

I would just do registry office and dinner after. If you want full bridal wear then small service in an art gallery or similar and finger food. Or registry and party in a hall or winery or similar.
Most important is food, heating and places for elderly to sit.

MsMcGonagall · 18/09/2022 02:40

No I wouldn't wait another year for a venue.

Hope you can find a venue for Christmas OP.

FrozenGhost · 18/09/2022 02:40

I would compromise on date, if Feb is OK, why not have it then. I think people, including the couple, will be losing interest in the whole idea by Dec 2024.

Flymeaway4 · 18/09/2022 22:22

Thanks everyone. I think just writing it out made me realise the same thing. Most important for me is that we have there all those we love and if waiting a year meant some couldn't come anymore (illness, mobility, or worse) I'd never forgive myself.

We have a newborn, otherwise I probably would consider this year!

OP posts:
Adultchildofelderlyparents · 18/09/2022 23:33

The place that you love that isn't available until 2024 - could you go there for a weekend break in December 2024 as a Christmas present to each other?
There are other ways to enjoy these special places and special times. It sounds very much like what is most important to you is the collection of people who are older/unwell, and making sure they are able to attend, so sooner rather than later perhaps, with a different venue/date.
Congratulations on your lovely newborn!

funzeny · 19/09/2022 03:32

The 'your special day' isn't any different than some places sell to every other couple. Some venues and photos are so forced you can't differentiate between some weddings they're factory structured and impersonal. Your day shouldn't be about the venue it should be fun and personal and different; not a package deal that is no different from the next bride

weddingwaiting · 19/09/2022 11:50

We opted to wait an extra 7 months for our venue although we started looking pretty much as soon as we got engaged so in total length it will still be less than 2 years.

For us it was just so tricky to find a venue that was affordable, suited the style of wedding we wanted, and suited us in terms of our principals (we, although Fiancé particularly, couldn’t square eg. a stately home with our politics ie. he feels strongly that these buildings should not be privately owned and did not want to give the owners more money) so we found a venue owned by the council.

You've waited his long to get married, what’s a few extra months for the wedding you want?

iekanda · 19/09/2022 11:51

No I would not. The marriage is more important than the wedding.

mnahmnah · 19/09/2022 11:56

I would move your date. Christmas really isn’t a good time of year for your guests. Already busy and expensive and potentially interrupts their plans.

MrsFionaCharming · 21/09/2022 19:51

We considered waiting a year for our preferred venue. Very glad we didn’t or it would have been cancelled due to Covid, and 3 of my husbands grandparents died in the year following our wedding!

krisskrosses · 30/09/2022 06:28

As someone who had to delay my wedding 2 years beyond its original date because of Covid, personally I would wait for the perfect venue, every time.

My wedding day was one of the best days of my life and turned out to be fully worth waiting for, and we didn't compromise. We had opportunities to do it earlier with fewer people, at a different time, etc. but we waited - and we were both so glad we did.

You only do this once (hopefully!) so you might as well do it right - that's my opinion anyway! You don't want to have regrets.

Everyone's different though and it really depends what are your priorities - if you just want to be married then get married! We really wanted the magical day we'd planned and so glad we had it.

We did have elderly relatives who were no longer in good enough health to make it in 2022, that was the only sad part, but still we wouldn't have done anything differently.

TheOpenRoad · 30/09/2022 06:33

Move the date. Christmas is a really busy and expensive time of year, and it's possibly sime guests won't be able to attend due to costs and other engagements. Also, in years to come uour wedding anniversary might slip down the priority list as Christmas activities take over.

Plus, having a wedding in February will guve everyone something to look forward to in winter!

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