Payment of bridesmaids dresses

[BoringMumso]

Hi , new here so bare with. My best friend is maid of honour at my wedding plus two teenage bridesmaids. My fiancé and I will be paying for her accommodation and the night before the wedding including a dinner. we paid for her at the tasting meal and of course we paid for the make up trial and hair and makeup on the day, all of which we were happy to do. The bridesmaids dress is £120 and obviously there are shoes, accessories etc to buy. Should I ask her to pay for her whole outfit, just the dress, just shoes and accessories or all of it. There is such conflicting info on line.
Thanks

Don't people usually pay for their own underwear?

The only reason there will be anything to pay for is because you're getting married and want her to be part of it. I never understand why any bride thinks that their friends should pay to be part of their event.

You pay, and factor it in to the costs, you want them as bridesmaids. I wouldn't pay for an outfit to be in someone else's pictures!

Agree with almost everyone.
Anything they are having to buy / pay out for to be part of the wedding party, you pay for.
If you don't mind what shoes they wear, how they do their hair, whether they choose to wear make up or not, etc etc., then you don't need to pay for that.

Seems a bit OTT to me to be inviting them along to tasting sessions and to be paying for meals and hotels the night before the wedding, but if you want to do that and can afford it, then I am sure it will have been appreciated by your friend.

You pay for everything, obviously.
(why would you think otherwise?)

I was asked to be a bridesmaid for someone years ago.

She had 4 bridesmaids and we had to pay for our own dresses.
She chose them...hideous doesn't come close. They were strapless prom dresses and this awful colour which matched her theme.

To make matters worse She ordered them 12 months before the wedding. By the time it came round I was 8 months pregnant (how inconsiderate!) And another bridesmaid had put on 2 dress sizes and her dress no longer fitted. I ended up giving her my monstrosity and she had to pay for a dress maker to cut a section out of mine and see it into hers. I ended up in a maxi dress which I also had to pay for of course.

So it's not unheard of for bridesmaids in this country to pay for their own dresses, but I wouldn't recommend it!

Should I ask her to pay for her whole outfit, just the dress, just shoes and accessories or all of it.

You need to pay for anything she is wearing, unless she can just wear anything she wants.

You have asked her to be tour bridesmaid. Unless you are happy for her to wear something she curr6owns of her choice then you pay for everything. Overnight hotel you also pay for if it is a distance from her home.

I'm planning my wedding next year at the moment.

I am paying for bridesmaids dresses but not shoes (they can wear whatever shoes they want, something they've already got etc)

I'm paying for someone to come and do hair/makeup including travel cost and the only adult bridesmaid will be using them too but paying for her own, as again, I am not specifying that she has to have hair and makeup done she just wants to. She's happy with that (actually offered to pay for her own dress but I said no on that one)

The other bridesmaids are children so if they/their parents want their hair doing on the morning that's fine but again as I'm not insisting they match or have it a specific way or even done at all then the parents can pay.

Some people think that's horrible unreasonable. Luckily the people involved don't

I honestly could not imagine having the cheek to ask someone to pay for a dress that I am requiring them to wear to my event.

Oh don’t be daft.

You just need to be a thoughtful and considerate person and apply that to any scenario

Who has said to you that you are being “horribly unreasonable” for making your bridesmaid buy their own shoes?

I wouldn’t but I think “horribly unreasonable” is a bit ott!

The bride pays for clothes, hair, make up but not accommodation..

Says the Lord

Sorry that was a typo 😅

Should have said some people would PROBABLY think that's horribly unreasonable...no one has actually said it in real life but this is mumsnet.

If I could afford it I would absolutely pay for everyone's hair, makeup, shoes, accommodation etc but we are on a tight budget. Adult bridesmaid is my best friend and has been waiting for me to get married since we were 6 years old. I think she's more excited than I am! So she just wants to be involved.

Child bridesmaids are all family and would have been gutted not to be asked. Would probably have caused a family fued tbh so it's not like I can have fewer bridesmaids to keep costs down

Would probably have caused a family fued

bloomin heck