Wedding timeline- what the general consensus?

[Misunderstoodagain]

Hi!
I posted a while back, different name I think, about wedding timeline.
So this is the refined version. Summer wedding, 95% guests staying overnight at venue. The whole thing is in one place. There are no evening guests, everyone is invited to it all.

2pm- guests can arrive and avail of the bar if they wish. (Will be approx 1hr 45 min drive for most people who aren't flying in)
3pm- non religious garden ceremony
3.30pm - unlimited canapies and cocktail reception. Wedding cake will also be served during this time. Variety of lawn games and kids play area will be set up (lots of children in attendance)

5.30pm dinner call
6pm dinner served - 5 course meal and speeches
8pm - dj starts/ 1st dance over and done with as quickly as possible!

10- 10.30pm- tea and coffee and wine served with a cheese wheel wedding cake and the cake left overs.

12pm midnight sliders/ hotdogs or similar
2am- sober up snacks for the party animals.

I know for some this goes on really late however accommodation is on site and I'd say kids and older ones will be tucked in bed by 12, but for half of them they will still be at the bar when it closes at 4am 😅
The reason for two wedding cakes is that neither of us really like cake so went for the cheese and then our respective mothers and aunties were up in arms about so one aunty has paid for a cake 🤣, I'll not complain.
Hopefully no one will go hungry 😋
I have a Spanish family so food was important and they are used to weddings going on to the early hours! It's was hard to find a middle ground to accommodate the majority of guests who will be Irish!
Any thoughts on changes or timelines anyone can add please
And thanks in advance.

Gosh Caspianberg, I would be starving at your wedding! 🙈 Can the guests buy their own food in the bar or something if necessary? Not meaning to panic you, I would find that such a long day waiting for dinner 🙉

@Rowen32 - really? How many meals a day do you normally eat at home? They have :

breakfast 8am-11am - they can eat unlimited amounts of hot and cold breakfast, unlimited drinks

lunch - 1pm canapés ( they are lunch), ie small tomato risotto with giant prawn, crispy chicken strips with dip. Various options. They are unlimited

Afternoon tea 2-4pm - unlimited cake, tea, coffee, soft drinks and alcoholic options

Dinner 6pm - 3courses.

evening- late cheese

I don’t know about you, but that’s way more than I ever eat at home. It’s food every 1-2 hours, unlimited and 3 courses.

@Caspianberg

I have to agree with a PP
Most people will probably eat breakfast earlier (lots of places start clearing up breakfast at 10.30 even if it technically goes on to 11, and some presumably have small kids or are elderly so up early and eat nearer to 8am).

Does anyone actually treat canapes as lunch? I've never seen anyone eat as many canapes as to make up a meal (well maybe one or two but it looks/feels very greedy and is usually just teens/young men) - each canape is one or two mouthfuls and how many mouthfuls usually is lunch?

So effectively you'll have quite a few who have had breakfast by 9, a few bites and some cake and nothing else except booze til 6.

This is why I usually try to go for brunch before that kind of wedding!

Why do people think canapes are a meal? They're supposed to be a few delicious tiny bits which is why they're served between meals or before a meal usually.

The same as everyone else! Weddings are long days though.. I'd be up first thing for breakfast so I'd have time to get ready, probably wouldn't have a chance to get a snack before the ceremony. Maybe your canapés are different but my experience of them is you get a few but enough to constitute a meal... Maybe people might if they know dinner isn't until later but I've only ever seen people eat canapés politely! Realistically you're only going to have one slice of cake. The 3 course meal is lovely but I'd be starving by midnight and don't eat cheese!

@TheHideAndSeekingHill - because the hotel venue sells the canapés as the ‘lunch’ option.
They are unlimited. We have tried some and each one is not just a bite.
For example the breaded chicken with sour cream dip I have added thinking the kids especially will enjoy is like 2 large chicken Goujon size per canapé.

We had 10 different ordered between dh, myself and toddler to sample each and were stuffed. About 3 each is what I would each for a decent lunch, and the hotel suggests most people eat 3-5 depending on person. Guests can eat 20 each if they like.

*not enough that should read - I might be the exception!

I just feel with canapés people don't eat them, like a PP said if you have more than one or two you feel greedy and and it doesn't look well to keep eating them! Just bear in mind people have different appetites, might be up early, might not necessarily like the canapés and its a very long day with the ceremony at 12:30. I had catering recently and the hot trays were marketed as serving 10, I was going by that until one of the waitresses said, have you brothers with big appetites, if so the trays aren't for 10 really and thankfully I got more, I know guys I know would be absolutely locked by dinner time 🙈

I just don't think anybody is going to eat 20 even if they want/need them cos it looks dreadful - other people might have a different opinion, you could start your own thread!

Sounds lovely but I would pull dinner forward by at least 20 mins - 2 hours is tight for that many courses and speeches

Well it’s hard to plead everyone. There really is food available almost all day. People know the schedule.
If someone chooses to eat a tiny meal at 8am and then refuse more than 1 canapé, and only eat a crumb of cake. It’s not my fault someone might be hungry at 6pm.
We have catered well I think for everyone, babies, vegans, gluten and dairy free etc.. I can’t cater for someone who chooses not to eat more when it’s available.

For op - I think there’s plenty of food. Just that the 5 course evening Mel might take a lot longer than maybe expected.

At my wedding most people couldn't finish the 3 courses they were served from 4.30 and then noone touched the evening food that came out at 9.30. I actually get grumpy at being overfed, being too full spoils a party but you feel wasteful and impolite if you don't eat it.

Could you reduce the courses? Five sounds a lot, especially as there is food throughout the day, people won’t be hungry and it will take ages! Even three courses can take 2hrs and it’s a long time to spend at a table when people will want to dance and mingle.

@Caspianberg So one of the courses is sorbet ( palette cleanser) so not really food.
We havent chosen the menu yet but there will be a choice of 2 mains, most likely a fillet and fish dish, (veggies catered for), the starter I think we are going for a picnic basket that's served to the table, cold meats, bread and soup and then a choice of one dessert or an afternoon tea style dessert tower for the table.
The package is already sorted not able to change the 5 courses etc.
Now I'm worried about how long it will take!! I've been to a few weddings recently and dinner wasn't more than 2hours I think. I'm having a separate kids table for when they finish they can go over and play, colouring books, legs etc so hopefully keep the younger ones occupied.

Lego not legs lol

@dmask I'm exactly the same! Hate overeating however I was so worried because the last wedding especially, the food situation was woeful and what did come for dinner was awful and everyone was complaining (not to the bride and groom thankfully). Then there wasn't supposed to be a cake, just the cheese wheels but then that got added on too! Oh well it's done now, I'd rather too much food than not enough.

I don't normally reply to these things but your wedding and timing reminded me a bit of ours. We also had no separate evening guests and almost everyone stayed over the night and most stayed the night before too (albeit largely at another hotel a short bus ride away) . However, we didn't go on as late as you. I put a lot of thought into giving people food/drink at appropriate times!

We served tea/coffee to welcome people to the venue between 2:30 and 3 o'clock. I think this was hugely appreciated. There was a minibus bringing from the other hotel. The ceremony was at 3:30, after which there was an immediate champagne and wedding cake reception in the garden. We did a few quick photos during that time. We also did our speeches in the garden (which personally I think are one of the best bits of a wedding and not boring at all). All very chilled.

Dinner (conventional three course affair) was around 6 o'clock or a bit later, followed by a live band and bar (unlimited wine, beer). We didn't provide any late evening food. I don't think it was missed. But I can see that if you want people to go on into the early hours you might want something. Our minibus did trips back to the other hotel between 11 and 12 I think.

We also put on a basic finger buffet (and skittles!) at a pub the night before, as well as tea/coffee/pastries round the (other) hotel pool the following morning, so I think we provided plenty!

@mast0650 thanks for that. Sounds great. It's not that I especially want an all nighter but I know there will be a lot of family that haven't seen each in some time and our friends that will be up most of the night so I want to make sure they are catered for. I genuinely want everyone to have a great time and I definitely want to get my moneys worth lol!

To be fair that's not what I meant at all. Someone could have a decent breakfast at 8, canapes and cake and really need a big dinner and I think unless everything is over by 11/12 it's polite to offer good again at that time or later. I'm surprised the venue haven't included it as it usually comes as part and parcel of packages. It's not about pleasing everyone, it's about making everyone's appetites are catered for. I never implied anyone would have a tiny breakfast, one canape and a crumb of cake, I was trying to be helpful.

Such good advice on here!