I hate how I looked on my wedding day

[Tiredasamf]

We got married 2 weeks ago. When I first chose my dress I loved it, but I’d just had a baby and my boobs were huge so the dress had to be built up for me to be able to wear a bra with it (it was originally backless) when I went to my fittings I didn’t like it as much as the original I’d tried on but it was okay, and I was stuck with it anyway! (My boobs shrunk by the wedding day so I could have had the original design which was annoying)

anyway on the day I felt okay, but we’ve had our wedding photos and honestly I hate every single one. We put the dress on in a rush on the day and definitely didn’t position it properly, it’s gapey, bunched up at the waist and just looks awful and like it doesn’t fit at all. I didn’t realise this on the day as I didn’t see myself throughout the day. But the photos are so so horrible. I also don’t like how my hair or makeup looks, I just hate the whole look.

I have really bad self esteem issues and really just wanted to feel pretty for one day, but looking at those photos I look worse than I usually do day to day! It’s really hit me and all I’m thinking about is what I did wrong and wishing I’d made other decisions - a different dress, had my hair down instead of up, heavier makeup, taken the time to position the dress properly etc

I’m so gutted. I’m one of those people where photos mean a lot to me and to have no photos that I like of the day has really gutted me.

has anyone experienced this or similar? It might sound silly to some but it’s literally keeping me up at night and every time I see a photo from the day I just cry.

I think this is an excellent idea. You're not being silly either but I bet you looked a lot better than you think 💐

It doesn't really matter that much though, does it?
I promise you that people are not really interested in the wedding photos of others.

Thank you, you’ve all made me feel a little better. I’m sorry that others have experienced similar but it’s good to know I’m not alone

We haven’t had all the photos through yet so I’m hoping there will be a few that I like, there are a couple that I’ve shared with friends and family - a close up of us where you can only see the back of my head but can see that I’m smiling, and a family one where I’m holding the baby who is luckily covering most of the dress!

I love the idea of a photo shoot I hadn’t thought about that, DH is very sympathetic and has agreed to get us and the kids dressed up in our wedding clothes again, go back to the venue and take some new photos.. I might even hire a different dress because can you imagine if I still didn’t like the new ones?! 🙈
he looked absolutely amazing, had a suit made just for him that fit like a glove so he’s buzzing to wear it again haha!

I’ve seen some guest photos and there are a couple I don’t mind but I really don’t like that so many photos of me that I hate are being shared all over social media, even the photographer shared an album of over 150 photos of the day and there are some really awful ones in there, it’s not helping my anxiety knowing that they’re plastered everywhere!

I would love to go back and do it all again, there is so much I would change

hopefully as you’ve said over time I won’t mind them or will stop caring!

Ps yes I love my husband and am over the moon that we’re married, and yes that’s the point of the day but in today’s world of such social pressure I can’t help but get sucked into it and wanted the ‘perfect day’ which it was, apart from me 🙈

Did you give permission for them to do that? I would withdraw it if so. Apart from anything else, when we married the photographer was the one saying my veil was wonky and to adjust it etc.

Having said that, if he thought you looked awful, he wouldn't be sharing.

When I got the proofs from the photographer, I hated every single one.

My dress and hair were both lovely, but I'm just so un-photogenic. I just hate my face in photos.
I didn't even want a photographer, that's how much I loathe having my phone taken!

The only photo I really liked is the one of the back of my dress and veil.

I understand how you feel.

there is a facebook group that does the most amazing photoshop edits for free...might ne worth a try?

I almost went bridezilla over mine, but held myself back. All over a necklace... it had a daisy made from pearls and was not anywhere near central in any photo, always twisted half round my neck etc. I wish someone had said something or moved it ... but crap happens sometimes and I moved on. No one else notices or cares.

Sympathy OP. I think it's not an uncommon experience, even though I'm sure you look much better than you think. The photo shoot idea's a lovely one, and great that your DH's up for it. Even if it doesn't matter to anyone else it's nice to have at least a few photos that you're happy with.

We don't have any nice wedding photos - just one black and white one which is just about acceptable in a frame, and a single colour snap taken by a friend which I don't absolutely hate. I hated my hair on the day - the hairdresser did a really stiff and fussy up-do which was absolutely not me, and I still wish I'd worn my hair down. Fortunately for us we got married nearly 20 years ago so there weren't any pics on social media for me to worry about! It doesn't take away from the happiness of the actual day, but I wouldn't mind having a few decent pictures. Far too late for a photo shoot for us unfortunately!

here's the link, you will probabaly need to join to see the amazing work people have done www.facebook.com/groups/1778035752221273

Yes, same.

Like you, getting dressed was rushed. Which in hindsight seems so silly and unnecessary.

Purchasing the dress was also rushed, and I couldn't be bothered with my hair so just for the hairdresser to put it up on the day, without trying it beforehand.

Out of the 100s of photos of the day, I managed to find a few that were ok, and a few I edited into sepia or similar to look better.

I am a bit disappointed, but I can't say I regret it as such. It would never have been me to spend ages dress shopping / trying hairstyles and make up etc.

My advice would be, if possible, get a few if the best photos edited to be as flattering as possible, frame them, and just look at those.

Keep the others in an album somewhere. I bet when you look at them in years to come they won't seem nearly so bad.

I understand and actually felt the same way when I got married (many, many years ago). I promise it stopped mattering at some point over the years and now I can laugh about it. Just be pleased you picked the right person as that bit never stops mattering 😊

Put them away and try to forget about it, concentrate on the fact you got married which is
lovely thing. Take some photos of your first anniversary, you can edit them so you're happy, frame them and have them out instead of wedding pics.