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Original poster

Kids welcome but not expressly invited, how to word this?

26 replies

ImInStealthMode · 14/12/2021 20:03

Hi Ladies

We're going to send our invites in the new year, eek! Invites will have a link to a website where all further information can be found.

We're not planning to name children specifically on the invites, but aren't averse to them coming if needs be. We know that the majority of our friends will grab any excuse to get babysitters and let their hair down, but circumstances may mean that doesn't work for everyone in which case they are welcome to bring them along and we'll make sure they're well catered for.

Any ideas or suggestions on how to word this on the website information we're supplying to guests?

Thanks

OP posts:
Redtartanshoes · 14/12/2021 20:05

I’m sure anyone needing clarity will ask.

thesockfromtheroof · 14/12/2021 20:06

To X, Y and family?

thesockfromtheroof · 14/12/2021 20:07

Or just 'Children welcome'

Scarby9 · 14/12/2021 20:08

Something like:
'Come as a couple / alone and have a night off, or the children are welcome too, if you want to come as a family'
?

SilverRingahBells · 14/12/2021 20:09

"If you want to bring your children with you then we'd be delighted to have them, but if coming without them is works better for you then that's fine too. Just let us know who to expect."

RogueV · 14/12/2021 20:09

Sorry but they’re either invited or they’re not.

Catmummyof2 · 14/12/2021 20:11

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

PurpleDaisies · 14/12/2021 20:11

Why don’t you just invite children and the ones don’t won’t want to bring them will reply that it’s just the adults?

ArblemarzipanTFruitcake · 14/12/2021 20:12

'Children welcome but not obligatory'

Grin
PurpleDaisies · 14/12/2021 20:13

@SilverRingahBells

"If you want to bring your children with you then we'd be delighted to have them, but if coming without them is works better for you then that's fine too. Just let us know who to expect."
Isn’t that just how anybody replies to an invitation? Confused

This all seems like massive overthinking to me. Do people really feel obliged to bring their children if they’re named on the invitation?

legalseagull · 14/12/2021 20:14

I think the suggestions above are great. If you invite the kids then parents sometimes feel obliged to bring them, when in reality they want a party!

"Come as a couple and have a night off, or come as a family, just let us know who to expect"

legalseagull · 14/12/2021 20:14

@ArblemarzipanTFruitcake

'Children welcome but not obligatory'

Grin

So perfect!!!
DSGR · 14/12/2021 20:15

I would say: “we would
Love you to come and celebrate without your children and let your hair down with us. However, if leaving your children at home is a problem, please do let us know and we will happily accommodate them.”

Emmas85 · 14/12/2021 20:15

Just write the invitations to the parent/s. That way if people want to/need to bring children they will ask.

Fritilleries · 14/12/2021 20:16

You're gonna confuse lots of people and end up pissed off that so many children are around..... just say "we are pleased to invite you to our wedding and look forward to making merry with our grown up friends and family"

Original poster
ImInStealthMode · 14/12/2021 20:16

@PurpleDaisies I don't have any, so I don't know. Do they? That's kind of why I'm asking how to approach it.

@SilverRingahBells Your wording is exactly what I was after but couldn't quite put together, thank you.

OP posts:
SnowyPetals · 14/12/2021 20:16

"Children welcome - just let us know if you're bringing them or having a night off!"

Clymene · 14/12/2021 20:18

@SilverRingahBells

"If you want to bring your children with you then we'd be delighted to have them, but if coming without them is works better for you then that's fine too. Just let us know who to expect."
This is perfect.
Lou98 · 14/12/2021 20:24

I think mentioning that they can bring them somewhere is a good idea.
If I received a wedding invite without my sons name on it I wouldn't assume he was invited and I'd also feel it would be cheeky to ask so it would be good to know the option is there if I couldn't get a babysitter

Goldbar · 14/12/2021 20:48

I would invite the couple/adult and then add 'Children welcome on prior request. Do let us know if you would like to bring them so we can accommodate them appropriately'.

I think the message you want to get across is that, while kids are welcome if the family come as a package, you'd prefer them to be left with a babysitter if possible.

MinnieJackson · 14/12/2021 21:10

Last wedding was addressed to only dh and I which made it easier to ask family to babysit Blush. The bride asked if my three kids would be coming, my answer, 'Christ, no!'

Original poster
ImInStealthMode · 15/12/2021 09:23

@Goldbar

I would invite the couple/adult and then add 'Children welcome on prior request. Do let us know if you would like to bring them so we can accommodate them appropriately'.

I think the message you want to get across is that, while kids are welcome if the family come as a package, you'd prefer them to be left with a babysitter if possible.

Yes that's pretty much it. Most of our friends who have kids have two, so if they all brought them we'd double the numbers immediately which could start to be problematic for space if nothing else. We wouldn't want anyone to decline just because they can't leave them at home though.

Our Best Man's 4 year old may need to come for example and that's absolutely fine, we love him and he's much better company than some of the adults we're obliged to invite Wink.

OP posts:
Pedalpushers · 22/12/2021 11:30

I addressed the invitation to the parents and put on the website that we can accommodate children but as we won't be providing childcare we won't be offended if you choose not to bring them.

Kite22 · 05/01/2022 23:59

I think most people will assume their kids are invited unless it expressly says they aren’t

Not in my world. My understanding is that those named on the invitation are the people that are invited. If you aren't on the invitation, then you are NOT invited.

I think @DSGR 's suggestion is the best, if you feel you want to say people can bring them.

Original poster
ImInStealthMode · 07/01/2022 22:49

In the end we went with something very similar to some of the suggestions here. Invites are on their way out now so we'll see sooner or later the response!

OP posts: