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Original poster

Did you regret marrying abroad

37 replies

Unsername1233 · 14/07/2021 20:19

Hey all, it’s me again following on from my last post. As some may be aware there were family fall outs before the invites even went out so me and my partner have had a complete change of plan. We’re now thinking to get married abroad which we think would be nicer, cheaper and it will only be our nearest and dearest there. I’ve seen you can actually buy wedding packages with First, etc which seems to make it far easier and less stressful.

Now I’ve always dreamed of the big wedding at home but I’m honestly not sure if it’s worth the stress or the cost. The most important thing to me is marrying DP and having DS there along with closest family.

Now, has anyone regretted not having the big wedding with every person you know/like there?

Is there anything about marrying abroad that has its draw backs? (Obviously when it comes to costs for close family and friends I would be happy to cover their costs if they can’t).

Thanks in advance (I’m actually beginning to find this exciting instead of stressful now!)

OP posts:
pinkcattydude · 14/07/2021 20:21

Vegas and not a hint of regret so simple and we had a fabulous time

1starwars2 · 14/07/2021 20:23

Well covid is likely to make marrying abroad a nightmare for the foreseeable future.

MadisonAvenue · 14/07/2021 20:23

We were married in New York. Just us, our (then toddler) son and the couple who’d just married before us as we didn’t have a witness and they obliged. I have no regrets whatsoever and wouldn’t have done it any other way.

Original poster
Unsername1233 · 14/07/2021 20:24

@pinkcattydude I LOVE that, what an experience! I honestly just feel with the whole big wedding, cost and pressure I may not actually enjoy the day itself and feel rated deflated after, after all it is only one day!

OP posts:
SoddingWeddings · 14/07/2021 20:28

Aren't most of the weddings abroad just a ceremony and a party, and are not legally binding marriages in the UK? Everyone I know who "married" abroad also had to go to tyke Registry Office in the UK and have a lnother legal ceremony.

Original poster
Unsername1233 · 14/07/2021 20:29

@SoddingWeddings it very much depends on the choice of destination. We would likely choose somewhere where it’s legally binding.

OP posts:
Fairunibutterfly · 14/07/2021 20:29

I married abroad pre-Covid. I was sad that not all my family could come including some close cousins but those of us there had a great time.

Oh’s side got to know my side and everyone became friends as we did a 3 day thing and most were staying in one hotel. Ours was bigger than your typical wedding abroad (about 50-60 people) but we would have had a few hundred back home.

We did always say we’d do a big party back home but that never happened.

I don’t regret it at all Smile I would say go for it! Ours was pre-Covid times but hopefully you can still do what you want to do now.

dementedpixie · 14/07/2021 20:31

We got married in Kenya and it was just the 2 of us that went. A couple in our hotel were our witnesses.

We didn't have to have a different ceremony in the UK and our marriage certificate was enough to change passport/driving licence, etc

StickersStickers · 14/07/2021 20:31

Like MadisonAvenue DH and I got married in New York. We got married in city hall and our photographer (our only compromise) was our witness. Loved it and never regretted it. Wouldn't change a thing!

dementedpixie · 14/07/2021 20:33

@dementedpixie

We got married in Kenya and it was just the 2 of us that went. A couple in our hotel were our witnesses.

We didn't have to have a different ceremony in the UK and our marriage certificate was enough to change passport/driving licence, etc

As we had no family there we did get a video done and had a photographer too. Video was transferred to dvd at one point as no-one has a video player any more!
Original poster
Unsername1233 · 14/07/2021 20:36

@dementedpixie did you regret not having all your family there or was it just as amazing having the both of you?

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 14/07/2021 20:37

DH and I are from different countries so one of us had to! IME the important people come.

We sent a very very stern message about no presents and had a lovely time.

dementedpixie · 14/07/2021 20:38

It would have been too expensive to have people there. My family were in Scotland and dhs family were in Englanc and it would have been too complicated to coordinate everything as well.

I don't regret them not being there, we had a amazing experience/holiday/honeymoon anyway

Bluntness100 · 14/07/2021 20:40

We got married in St Lucia. Was beyond fabulous, wouldn’t change a thing. The marriage is legal in the Uk.

ZenNudist · 14/07/2021 20:40

I loved getting married abroad. Just wanted guarantee of sun! I went to Cyprus because ceremony was in English and documents too. I'm legally married. Didn't need to marry in the UK.

Specifically wanted to avoid the big samey do with the obligation to invite lots of people. MIL still managed to invite her family!!

GrandmasCat · 14/07/2021 20:41

I did and I didn’t. I would have liked to have those close members of the extended family around but I do not regret not having to invite the 350 people (extended family, friends and friends of parents, etc) we would have needed to invite if we had married locally.

AnnaSerena · 14/07/2021 20:42

I got married quite young and really wanted the big white wedding. We had roughly 200 guests and it was a great day, but it was so unbelievably stressful. When I married my current DH we'd both done the big wedding thing before, so we decided to have a much smaller one in New Zealand. Only the kids, family and close friends came. It was lovely, a lot less stress and a lot more beachSmile

HalfShrunkMoreToGo · 14/07/2021 20:43

Vegas, we didn't invite anyone and used the chapel witnesses, then had a cheap and completely informal knees up a couple of days after we got home. Hired a pub, put some money behind the bar, got a small, medium and large chocolate cake from Tesco and put them on top of each other for a wedding cake. No speeches, no seating plan, no dress code, just a load of people we know all in the same place drinking, dancing and having a laugh. We put disposable cameras all round the pub and told everyone to take pictures all night and leave us the cameras so we could develop the shots. Some were questionable but we have loads of really great pictures of people we love having fun together.

SirenSays · 14/07/2021 20:59

We had a mini "ceremony" and celebration with a load of our close backpacking friends on Moreton Island in Australia. It was a gorgeous laid back day and we loved every single minute. One day we'll have a more official wedding in Bora Bora but I plan on doing a lot more travelling first.
My parents for married on the beach in the Caribbean so I'm just following tradition I suppose 👰🏖️

Crazycatlady2016 · 14/07/2021 21:13

My DH and I got married in Cyprus. There was just 8 of us. I never wanted a big traditional wedding but had considered having a small ceremony in the UK. This caused a lot of fall out as DH has a big family, and I have a small and very close family. We decided to make things less stressful and to have the wedding we wanted, that we would go abroad, knowing that people would be more accepting of not being invited. The day was absolutely magical and I wouldn’t change a thing! To keep the peace, we had a party when we got back and invited all of our family and friends. It also meant I got to wear my dress twice!
Organising a wedding abroad is so much simpler and more cost effective, I would 100% recommend it!

InsideNumberNine · 14/07/2021 22:00

Married in Portugal. Invited everyone as normal. Expected 20-30 people. Got 71!!!!

Absolute best day of our lives. Has gone down in folklore in numerous social circles as the best wedding ever (it helped that we all ended up in the pool at 11pm, including me in full wedding dress)

LawnFever · 14/07/2021 22:06

We got married in Cyprus, legally binding in the UK, fabulous weather & don’t regret a thing.

We ended up with 35 guests, had to accept not everyone would come but our immediate family did & that was absolutely fine.

We had a two week holiday, got married in the middle, everyone else did their own thing some staying at different hotels or different lengths of time.

We used a wedding planner rather than through a travel agent because I didn’t want a hotel location, using a planner gave more personalised options - some people arrange it themselves but tbh I work in events and it was quite a treat to have someone else do the planning!

BrilliantBetty · 14/07/2021 22:07

Gutted that a close friend of mine got married last year abroad.

It would never have been possible for us to go. Cost and some other reasons.

But I was so sorry not to be there. They had a great day. I'm sad to have missed out on the opportunity of celebrating them as a couple on this magical, memorable day, and showing them what they mean to us (put it in a card, but not quite the same) but of course they had a great time and yes it saved some drama.

LawnFever · 14/07/2021 22:10

Oh forgot to say, we didn’t have a party/reception when we got home, we wanted a small wedding and doing that would’ve defeated that point for us - plus we didn’t want to spend any more money Grin

TigerDroveAgain · 14/07/2021 22:14

We got married in Sri Lanka: it was amazing, local witnesses, no friends or family: then when we got back DH said he wanted a do for his family Biscuit so we did a full church blessing and party at a posho hotel. So not quite escaping the madness but I did get to wear my dress twice!

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