Registry Office Alternatives?

[officecat]

Hi,

We have been trying to get married for a few months now 😀 Our first option (planned in January) was New York in October, Central Park, just the two of us and our witnesses. Obviously, that was cancelled in July. There have been other options, but they are just not going to happen with COVID restrictions.

Our local registry office is just awful! My DF is quite adamant that he doesn’t want to get married there because he wants our wedding, albeit a four person max ceremony, to be ‘special’.

My question is, as I have no clue whatsoever 😂
Is there an alternative to a registry office? We are not religious, so not a church.

Thank you

In England the only other legally recognised alternative is to hire a licensed wedding venue.

That then comes with the cost of:
Hiring the venue
Hiring the ceremony room (venues tend to charge for this in addition to the venue hire fee)
Paying the registrars fee to come out to a licensed venue (approx £400-£500, varies according to your council and where you are in the country)

You do not have to get married at your local registry office, it can be any one you choose and there are some nicer ones around.

I know it's not for everyone, but personally i'd do the legal bit at the registry office just so you are legally married and then have a separate ceremony elsewhere with a celebrant. The bare bones legal bit at the registry office can be done in jeans and a t-shirt if you like and you'll be in and out within 5 minutes. You say a legal declaration that you are free to marry, sign the paperwork and you're off.

Save all your vows and rings and special stuff for the celebrant led ceremony. That way you can then have the ceremony anywhere of your choosing. A cliff top, your favourite place together, where you first met. And no restrictions at all on what you can say or do. Best of both worlds!

You don’t have to get married at your local registry office. Are there any others near you that you might like better?

Our local one is closed for refurbishment so they’re doing weddings in a very boring office block instead which was not for us, but the second closest one is stunning and we had a wonderful day there!

What country are you in? I'm in Scotland and had a humanist ceremony (didn't need to be a licensed venue).

We chose a beautiful registry office that's not remotely local to us (think other end of the country). Going to stay a few days, get married and come home! As pp have said, it can be any registry office so please don't feel like it would have to be either your local one or something else.

We were supposed to be getting married in NYC in October too. We kept the date but changed to old Marylebone town hall in London and we had the best day. Just choose a registry office you both like

Thank you so much! I just had a major meltdown because my DF wants to get married in Italy in December. This was planned in the summer when everything was looking better. I don’t want to prepare a wedding that has, let’s say a 90% chance of not happening, and if it does go ahead, we won’t be able to celebrate afterwards because everything will most likely be shut!

He says I am being negative, I say I am being a realist. It so stressful seeing European countries going into lockdown one by one, but still trying to push on with what is supposed to be one of the happiest days of our lives.

I have lived abroad most of my life, and although on paper ‘an Italian wedding’ sounds lovely, it will still be just an Italian town hall for twenty minutes, followed by nothing in an AirBnb, albeit a very chic one.

Well, it was good to get that of my chest 😀 I will show DF these other suggestions.

@officecat we got married in a beautiful place in Cornwall - think old stone cottages, lake etc. Let me.know if you want details.

Scotland - you can get married pretty much anywhere by a registrar or humanist celebrant - up a mountain, on the beach etc.

Italy has introduced new measures and weddings are limited atm. It’s a bad idea to consider a wedding in Italy right now.

There are lots of lovely registered venues in the Uk- no idea how far you are from London? Firmdale Hotels do weddings, they have a lovely one in Knightsbridge.

www.firmdalehotels.com/a/weddings/london/wedding-venues/

New restrictions Italy:
Cinemas, theaters, swimming pools, gyms have to close, although museums can remain open. Gatherings for weddings, baptisms and funerals are banned, as are all events and fairs.

Travelers from the Uk need to arrive in Italy with a negative Covid test or get tested within 48 hours. Also you have to quarantine for 14 days when you return to the Uk.

Eek, really sorry to say it but your fiancé is kidding himself if he thinks it’s a good idea right now to plan a wedding in Italy in, what, 6 weeks’ time? As you say, there’s probably a 90% chance of that not happening and why would you put yourself through all that stress and uncertainty?

If you want to book a UK registry office for the same date you’ll need to do it very soon as you need something like a month’s notice. Really hope you can persuade him!

We have already given notice and our CNI will be ready on Friday. I have a planner in Florence so all the logistics are in place. I just think the whole thing will be dreary, even if it would be in a Tuscan decor.

Oh I meant you’d have to give notice again if you switch to a UK venue. Fingers crossed you can go ahead with the Italy plan though!

Ah yes, I wasn’t sure if I needed to give notice again. I have just cancelled everything. It is too stressful not knowing.

Oh I’m so sorry officecat, how do you feel? I found the uncertainty the absolute worst part so sometimes it feels better to just have a decision made! You must be gutted though, I’m sorry

I feel so sad 😞 I hated planning all these wonderful things, with all the uncertainty and negativity that went with. I weirdly feel better having made a decision, but, yes, I am gutted. Thank you @CoronaBride2020

Come join the Pity Party thread! www.mumsnet.com/Talk/wedding/4048009-Autumn-Winter-2020-corona-brides-and-grooms-Pity-Party

I get it, I really do. We postponed from the spring and finally got married on Saturday and while it was lovely, the stress and anxiety and uncertainty beforehand literally made me ill. I didn’t get to feel excited at all, really, as there was so much talk of half term lockdowns and circuit breakers and all the rest that I couldn’t be 100% sure the wedding was even happening until just a couple of days before.

I’m so happy to BE married now but the anxiety before it was honestly one of the worst times of my life. Anyone who isn’t going through it will probably say ‘what’s the big deal, it’s just a wedding’ but it really is horrendous. Whether you postpone again or try to press on and get married the whole thing is stressful AF and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!