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Original poster

Wedding dress on a budget for someone who sucks at dresses

28 replies

BiBiBirdie · 04/01/2020 15:25

My DH asked me after 21 years, to marry him on Christmas Day. To sum up what a shock it was, I laughed, then asked was he dying of some awful disease I was yet to be made aware of- I had come to terms with us not getting married but most people have called me by his surname for the last 15 years anyway.

Anyway, we are on a budget and I really cannot begin to imagine spending £500+ on a dress for one day.

I'm socially quite awkward too, I don't do dressing up, I live in jeans and Converse. So dresses I am clueless at.
I don't have Mum or Sister or aunts to help out, my mates live 4 to 5 hours drive away so that's not going to be an option. I'm a size 16 (currently cutting back on food and exercising more, doing Dry January and sweet and chocolate free so would hope to be a 14), I have size 38C boobs and a tummy. I'm 5 foot 8. Broad shoulders which puts me off anything strapless.
Can anyone help with styles or where I could find one that won't cost lots? I've looked on eBay and Marketplace/Schpock and Gumtree as I don't mind second hand.
Thanks

OP posts:
TDL2016 · 04/01/2020 17:38

ASOS have a bridal range, so do many similar online retailers. If you’d prefer to try a store, lots of bridal shops will do sales on their stock dresses where you can get a bargain. Monsoon have a great range. Be wary of buying a dress from eBay, I’ve heard some horror stories, it’s very common for sellers to use the designers original photos and send a very bad copy. Try going to try on in a shop like Wed2Be, the staff are lovely in my experience and there is no pressure to buy.
Try every style you can on, don’t rule anything out, wedding dresses look very different on the hanger to on your body.

TDL2016 · 04/01/2020 17:40

Oh, and congratulations on your engagement!

JorisBonson · 04/01/2020 17:43

ASOS bridal is fab, my best friend got a beautiful dress from there.

I got mine from Zalando, it's not strictly speaking a wedding dress but it's white and what I wanted - and it was less than £100 in their sale.

KittenVsXmastree · 04/01/2020 17:48

My dress came from Debenhams.
Phase 8, Monsoon and ASOS are also worth looking at.

CoffeeAndCarbs · 04/01/2020 18:30

I got mine from Ebay, made to measure and sent from China. I wasn't expecting much but I was pleasantly surprised! Cost me all of £92 (which is more than enough for something I wore once for a total of 3hrs). I got married on a beach and changed into something more comfortable after the pictures x

Original poster
BiBiBirdie · 04/01/2020 19:53

Thank you ladies, I've been very wary on eBay, I've heard and seen appalling things myself. I've been more looking at either one worn once with a view to making alterations, or adding a different ribbon/a sleeve (I know a very good alterations lady), or at bankrupt/liquidation stock.
I'll have a look at ASOS, I'm also wondering if Debenhams may be a good call as they seem to be disappearing from the High Street so may be reducing everything.

OP posts:
Haybo26 · 05/01/2020 21:58

Try Chi Chi, I got mine from there. Its online. It fits like a glove. Congrats xx

5zeds · 05/01/2020 22:02

I’d buy a really cool white silk top or fitted jacket, new jeans and boots and go comfortably sassy

Original poster
BiBiBirdie · 06/01/2020 20:26

Thank you all
I've been told by my partner's cousin that her local Debenhams had wedding dresses ridiculously cheap at they are shutting permanently on Saturday, so I'm off on an explore tomorrow. Even if I can get shoes and veil there I'll be chuffed.

OP posts:
KaptenKrusty · 06/01/2020 20:31

I bought a ted baker ivory coloured dress for 250£ on ASOS - it’s not a wedding dress - just a nice ivory short dress - all the bridal dresses I saw were bloody strapless or long which just wasn’t for me!

Have a look on ASOS and order a few to try on and you can easily send them back if they not right

Palavah · 06/01/2020 20:33

Oxfam also have bridal, I think, worth looking at it if you know a good seamstress

Ploppymoodypants · 06/01/2020 20:37

I bought a second hand Maggie Sottero one on eBay for £150. (They retail at about £1000). I spent £80 on alterations so it fitted perfectly. It looked as good as new (obviously only worn once 😁)

EgremontRusset · 06/01/2020 20:38

Congrats! I bought mine on eBay 2nd hand. It had a lace up back so i knew it wouldn’t need much alteration - something to look out for?
Also are you sure about 38C, maybe try eg bravissimo to double check that, as it’ll affect the dress’s fit?

strawberry2017 · 06/01/2020 20:43

Chi chi do some lovely dresses in loads of colours. Go for whatever you feel fabulous in, nothing to stop you getting some fabulous special converse to wear with it if that's what makes you most comfortable! X

IndefatigableMouse · 06/01/2020 20:47

I got my dress at Debenhams for £300 - it was over ten years ago but I imagine they will still have stuff in budget!

TheCaddyisaBaddie · 06/01/2020 20:52

Debenhams are closing down some of their stores. Some have had wedding dresses going for £20 Shock Might be worth a look if you have one close by just in case. I dont think that there would be a huge choice but possibly one that you could take to a dressmaker and get jazzed up to your taste.

Original poster
BiBiBirdie · 07/01/2020 21:35

Thank you all
Went to Debenhams and unfortunately had no luck, a woman came on and bought what they had left, no doubt appearing on eBay sharpish (good luck to her though).
I've been looking on eBay and a good friend said about a big secondhand store near her that has a huge wedding section with suits, wedding dresses and bridesmaids bits too.

I'm reliably informed that I should perhaps go to an actual dress shop to try some on to get an idea of shape/style. I do have a very good seamstress I've used before so that won't be a worry if it's a little tuck and nip here and there.

I don't mind wearing a dress, as long as it's not a huge frothy thing that weighs akin to a small family car, as I want to be able to dance at the reception.

OP posts:
sorryiasked · 07/01/2020 21:45

Definitely phone round your local charity shops (assuming you don't mind second hand). Most of them have a shop somewhere which has a bridal section, but they are often well hidden!

Original poster
BiBiBirdie · 07/01/2020 22:03

Oh I don't mind second hand at all, afterall, it's a dress you wear once (well, I hope so after waiting this long) and then either hang in the wardrobe or sell to someone else. As long as it's in a good state I'm happy.
I have the ladies in my local secondhand keeping an eye out, in fact I've known them for years and they're coming to the do afterwards. I will definitely give the next town over shops a ring as well.

OP posts:
AnotherEmma · 07/01/2020 22:05

Um. I know this wasn't your question but I am willing to bet your wedding budget that your bra size is most definitely NOT 38C.

Measure yourself using this calculator and come back and tell me I'm right Wink
booborbust.com/

(PS Your dress will look fab once you're wearing a well fitting bra Wink)

happytoday73 · 07/01/2020 22:12

I agree worth going into a shop and taking advice on styles/seeing what you like.

Just in case there is a shop near you... www.oxfam.org.uk/shop/local-shops/oxfam-bridal-departments

Original poster
BiBiBirdie · 08/01/2020 11:02

@AnotherEmma my boobs are weird. Ive been measured before but I have one that is lopsided, so I wear a chicken fillet in it. Evens it out and my bras are comfy.

OP posts:
AnotherEmma · 08/01/2020 11:04

Trust me, do it!
Where did you get measured? Not M&S by any chance?

Ohyesiam · 08/01/2020 11:06

Do you want a wedding dress, or just a lovely dress?