Please help me plan my wedding!

[lemonjelly131]

*So we’ve been engaged for 2 years, have 2 young DC, I’m a SAHM so we have a very tight budget (£3500 ish) I’m just clueless as to where I’m meant to start, DP is useless at planning. Like who do I have to contact, what do I say?! Some tips on how to do it cheaply but nicely would be great, maybe a run down of what your costs were so I have an idea. We love to get married in church but have no clue where to go afterwards, love a sit down meal but not sure if it’s do able on our budget?

We both just want to be married, I’d happily elope but DP wants his whole family there, so the guest list is a big stress. I’m only close with my parents and young sisters, been NC with my real dad about 4 years but all my family (grandparents, aunties, uncles) are on his side so it’s kind of awkward. So for me it’s like do we invite all my family and feel awkward and there be a weird atmosphere on our wedding day or not invite any of them and feel like it’s a room of his family.

I’ve found a dress on the highstreet for £180, got the girls dresses from monsoon. Just need to sort DP and DS a matching suit! If anyone knows where you can get a matching suit for DP and a 2/3 year old??

Any advice, tips & experience would be very appreciated! And if you got this far thank you!!*

So we're thinking may or August next year, is that too soon??

Thank you @QforCucumber that's actually really helpful!!
@jackio2205 I'd love to have a small intimate do, I've been trying to whittle DPs guest list down since he proposed, got it to about 35 now

No worries, our reception was catering, welcome drink and also room hire etc at the golf club, you could probs find cheaper.
Dress was a sample dress of an £1800, was over the moon, bought 2 sizes too big hence the need for a seamstress.
Mens Suits we bought one for DH and one for his friend, you may not do this.
Cake £220.00 - was cheaper to get one made by a lcoal small baker than an M&S one, was 3 tiers and Vegas theme :)
Shoes,Earrings, Hairpiece all bought in sales, earrings and tiara thingy from Debenhams when they have their 70% off!
Photographer was a pro, only came and took pics of guest arrival and cake cutting really, could prob have done without
Invites were from Vistaprint!

I just feel like what's the point of inviting distant family (my grandparents and great aunties/uncles) if they're just going to sit in a corner with a face like a slapped arse and not speak to anyone just for the sake of 1. Not rustling their feathers by not inviting them and 2. Making up numbers for my family

It can be done. We are having 26 ppl Inc us. Registry office on a Friday.

Reception in a lovely country pub, all they are charging for is food per head. They are going to use their sound system and a playlist for free.

I've been buying bits as I've gone along, veil, shoes etc to break the cost down and wait for sales. I've designed my own dress and honeypie boutique are making it. It came in at £300 quid but £100 odd of that was for a lace overlay so could have been less than £200.

I'm ordering a cake from m&s for £35.

I'm going to get dp to look at the local McArthur glen outlet for a suit. Best man can wear one he has.

I'll get pageboy (x2) outfits from matalan probably and keep it casual as it will hopefully be hot so that's £22 each plus shoes, prob around £15.

Flower girl dress and shoes are from eBay, less than £30.

I'm not having adult bridesmaids.

Flowers were £178 for a bouquet, 2 button holes, 2 children's button holes and a flower girl wand but they are made out of ribbon so can be sold on if I really wanted to.

A local photographer agreed to do it for £350.

I shopped around for hair and make up. £135 for hair, £135 for make up, for me and my mum, Inc a trial.

I'm currently looking for a videographer to record the ceremony but I can't find one cheap enough for just the small amount of filming I want. So far cheapest is £350. Not sure if I'll book them or not yet.

We love to get married in church

Do you go to church? If you don't, you can't just turn up and book it like a normal venue. We would have had to attend church for at least 6m before they would put us on their register, attend Bible classes and be christened. The whole process would have taken about 13m.

We were going to do it but then they got funny about us booking the hall (they wanted to give regulars first dibs on the date for the hall and we wanted to hold it all in the same place) so we said sod it, we'll spend our money elsewhere.

I ran a wedding planning business for years.
There are so many ways to keep the budget down.
You've been given all the right advice re church ceremony so I won't go over that again.
Dresses you've already sorted.
Wedding shoes, veil, hairpieces can be bought cheaply on eBay.
In fact eBay can be your friend for many cheap wedding supplies, bunting, favours, place cards, children's activity packs, decorations, bouquets, table centrepieces. (If you want any of these things)
Next do matching suits, alternatively google matching suits and there are dozens of company's.
Faux flowers are a cheaper alternative to real for bouquets. If your crafty you can make these yourself.
Hobbycraft have some cheap wedding items, guestbooks etc..

The venue is where you will spend most of your money.
What do you want? Sit down meal followed by an evening reception?
Venus can range from, local pubs, hotel function room, nice restaurant, community hall, golf clubs.
Google wedding venues in your area create a standard email, send it to them all asking for prices etc... and see what comes back and what works for you.
Feel free to pm me if you have any questions. Xx

We are getting married next Feb, 2nd marriage for us both. We decided early on it was just going to be parents, our dc, siblings and nephews/nieces plus 2 very close friends. All in all there will be around 35 of us. We then found a stunning venue in the Cotswolds that do an 'intimate' wedding package. We are not having an evening party but have a separate room in the hotel for those wanting to join us for a tipple.

Is costing £3k for this so doable. Decide on your guest list first. I don't think bride/groom numbers need to be equal but more about who are the most important people to you. I'd choose a friend over an aunt I barely see!