Advice on wedding plans: small ceremony followed by reception on different days

[User234678]

I got engaged a few months ago and we were originally planning to wait a couple of years but unfortunately since the engagement a couple of close family members have been quite ill and it's made me realise that if we don't do it soon some of our family might not be here for it.

Neither of us particularly like the idea of being center of attention all day with loads of people looking at us so it was always going to be a small ceremony anyway.

So my ideas so far are a late summer wedding, midweek ceremony, outside (we are in Scotland so this is legal though not sure of all the ins and outs of this) with 15 or so close family followed by a meal in a local restaurant. Then a party either that weekend or the next in a local hall for extended family and friends, although there won't actually be a first dance or speeches, it would just be a buffet, cake and drinking.

Would this be silly? Should we just have the midweek ceremony with close family and forget the party?

It’s not silly but ..
do you really want to organise a small wedding and then a whole other event? Is it not just easier to have a small wedding followed by lunch followed by a party later on that night. Might make more sense for evening guests. Or just a small wedding
Is it midweek because of cost or availability?
If cost, the party will still be an investment for you and guests.

A good friend did this (I went to both bits) and it was lovely.

The small ceremony was really intimate and special.

Then the party was great fun, with none of the anxiety of it being her 'actual' wedding day.

A few older relatives were cross that the reception wasn't a real wedding and didn't bother to turn up. But she could live with that 😉

With hindsight, I'd have enjoyed splitting it in this way more, much less stressful. Only problem is that as pp have said, you may have some people not turn up for the party if they know you've had the wedding separately.

I don't see a problem with both if you'd like to have a celebration with your friends but that is more relaxed.
The only thing I'd add would be to have a moment at the party where you thank everyone for coming and raise your glasses. Doesn't have to be a big elaborate speech.

This is what we are doing (also Scotland) Just us, the celebrant and two friends on the beach around Arasaig then a party back home a few weeks after. Just perfect.