Share your feeble RSVPs here...

[DoTheCabinetShuffle]

NC'd for this as MIL and SIL to be know my regular username.

Our wedding is next month - church ceremony, 1pm on a Saturday followed by reception 10 mins drive away. (Was meant to be) 65 guests with 15 of them having to travel a length where they'd need accommodation. However it's the guests that are local that are p*ssing me off. Here's some texts I've had over the last week, RSVP cut off date is today.

DP's brother (wife and 2 kids): "We would come but we're going on holiday the week after..." (that was it, no following sentence) - tempted to respond "OK shall I count you out then?" but know it comes across as rude.

My uncle: "I would be able to attend if there was complimentary accommodation?" - no, there's not, you live 20 minutes away and own a car. Haven't even responded to that one I'm still seething.

My cousin (not related to Uncle mentioned above): "Can I check if there will be drinks and food provided, if so how much/how long for?" - yes this is usually how any celebration you are invited to works, if it was BYO I would have made this clear on the invite; I'm not going to bloody charge you per canapé.

Two of my friends were due to come and be each others 'date', one has started a new job and has 6 weeks of training away from home, totally understandable, the other messaged me last night saying she's thought about it and doesn't want to attend 'alone' - she will know loads of people there, granted she is single, lives 15 mins cab journey away.

I don't care about the numbers, just feel like these are shitty explanations. DP and I had to turn down a local wedding invite last year as we had something on every other weekend that month and were in saving mode for the wedding - I explained just that in my RSVP and that was that.

I'm the first to admit your wedding day is not necessarily the most important day of the year to anyone apart from you and your husband/wife to be. Despite knowing this, I feel like I'm going a bit crazy and all morning been feeling low about the 'meh' RSVPs.

meh... just be grateful you don't have to pay for the dinner of someone who doesn't really want to be there!

Crikey, you're cross!

People like a drink at a wedding. A 20 minute drive is a £30 taxi fare my way ,so I can see why the uncle wants to stay.
I also don't think asking about food and drink is unreasonable. I went to an afternoon wedding that finished at 11pm but only served canapés after the ceremony and a few sandwiches at 9pm.

I'm with you OP - some of those responses are just rude!

If your uncle is worried a taxi fair then he's essentially saying 'I'll only come and see you get married if I can get pissed'.

But people are crap at RSVPing. They forget, or hey think they've told you but they haven't... I'd do a ring round and check the wavers.

Yes, Op, very frustrating, but try to keep chilled.
Your DP should be the one that asks his brother what that response was supposed to mean.
Whoever 'owns' the free-loading uncle could ask whichever parent he is his brother of to point out that he is local enough to get a cab/share a cab/ arrange his own accommodation etc.
The food and drink enquirer isn't so odd really, given the number of threads on here about weddings with inadequate catering. Maybe he's asking whether he needs to have a proper lunch before the wedding, maybe he's diabetic or has some medical problem with food. Most wedding invitations IME have also had a menu choice/food allergies reply card, so if your invitations didn't, then maybe he thinks there won't be any food?
Could your 'lonely' girl friend bring a +1 to take up the place of the other friend who cannot come because of the training course?
Hope it all goes well, whoever chooses not to attend.

They all sound annoying to me
Assume they're not attending and redistribute your funds accordingly

I think they're all rude, and I can see why you're seething. Even if you had a need to eat at regular intervals, couldn't you just take supplies in an insulated lunch bag, and toss them out if not needed?
Uncle is beyond cheeky asking you to pay for accommodation and can't believe your future BIL won't come because they're going on holiday a week later. Single friend also sounds a bit pathetic.
I hope you have a lovely day with everyone else who does want to be there with you.