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Original poster

Guests wearing white for a wedding

30 replies

lastnamefirstfirstnamelast · 30/05/2018 11:13

Just a question, a friend of mine got married last friday and of course pics from guests have appeared on FB, i noticed one of the guests was wearing a dress like this -

www.missguided.co.uk/white-lace-midi-skater-dress-10096977

has the not wearing white to a wedding rule now changed etc. i dont think i'd be to happy with a guest wearing a dress like that....

OP posts:

MaryPoppinsPenguins · 30/05/2018 11:16

My mil wore what was very clearly a wedding dress to mine. Didn’t take away my enjoyment of the day and has been a funny story to tell ever since

notacooldad · 30/05/2018 11:20

White is not normally the done thing but things seem more relaxed these days and I would be fine with it.

The guests are knowing who the bride is.
I wouldn't get hung up about what colour people chose to wear.

Original poster

lastnamefirstfirstnamelast · 30/05/2018 11:22

thats what i thought really, it must have become more relaxed, i think now i'd get upset about it but on the day i'd probably couldnt care less! xx

OP posts:

MistyMeena · 30/05/2018 11:22

That dress wouldn't bother me in the slightest. In fact only when I looked at my photos did I realise 2 guests wore white to my wedding. Everyone knows who the bride is, I'm not sure how someone wearing white makes any impact on the day.

Unless it's actually a a wedding dress

YetAnotherNewName1000 · 30/05/2018 11:25

Loving the name of the website...'missguided' lol.

MaisyPops · 30/05/2018 11:33

If it's not a wedding dress then who cares.
To me, we have to ask why someone would possibly have an issue with someone wearing a colour and the only reason I can think of is 'but then people might not be looking at me all the time'.

Nobody is going to go to a wedding and think gosh I know I had an invitation for my friend's wedding but I'm not sure who the bride is because someone is wearing a knee length white dress.

I've seen some threads on here where any pale pastel is also out, same for white background dresses with a bright print on it. Some women need to give their head a wobble in my opinion.

Could you imagine grooms getting annoyed because they are wearing a grey suit and other men might have also worn grey?

Whattheactualfuckmate · 30/05/2018 11:35

People who purposely dress in white st weddings are always knobs

notacooldad · 30/05/2018 12:34

People who purposely dress in white st weddings are always knobs
Not necessarily, a lot of etiquette around weddings seems to be fading. A lot of young women maybe wouldn't realise they had broken a code.

It's not. The end of the world stuff.
Disclaimer. I've never worn a white dress to a wedding!!!

FreeMantle · 30/05/2018 13:01

Whattheactual agreed.

It's only ok once in a while because most people don't do it.

I think that white dress looks bridal and as someone who bought a high street wedding dress, I think it's risky.
As a guest you wear something that looks looks nice and suits you and let the bride wear the white dress.

Yumyumpigs · 30/05/2018 13:07

Oh god no! I would never do this I think it's very rude

soapboxmum · 30/05/2018 13:08

This is SIL and MIL. For some reason (attention) they choose or buy the most ridiculously inappropriate outfits for every occasion!

Bright colours for funerals, white for weddings, dowdy for cruise dinners, shorts to visit the Vatican (I kid you not)... and it’s always accompanied by days or weeks of angst beforehand... “I’ve got this to wear but the rules say you have to cover your knees and it’s too short, what do I do?”

Just don’t fucking wear it you twats.

They do it on purpose. I ignore them.

White gorcweddings? There are still enough people around that think it is crass to put me off. It hasn’t blended into the “used to be a Nono but ok even trendy now” box yet!

strawberryalarmclock · 30/05/2018 13:11

I don't think wearing white is the issue but more the style. I went to a wedding a few weeks ago and a guest was wearing a white floor length vintage wedding dress She even arrived after everyone else, so made a big entrance just moments before the bride, it wasn't her finest hour!!!

MaisyPops · 30/05/2018 13:28

Now that's inappropriate strawberry.

soapbox some people do love the shock factor. You can spot them a mile off. A friend of mine wore white and pale pastel to my wedding. It was a gorgeous outfit and not at all bridal. Sure, we had a casual wedding but it wouldn't have crossed my mind that she was doing it to upstage me.

But ettiquette is changing for things in some circles. The last funeral I went to people dressed smart but nobody was in all black. I think I wore pale grey with a little black. Friends have been to funerals where the family have specifically said they want a celebration of life so please don't feel you have to wear black.

It's always about the person, not the outfit to me.

Racecardriver · 30/05/2018 13:32

A lot of women don't wear full on wedding gowns though and dele D on white to mark them out as the bride. Although I think the whole it should be obvious who the bride is thing is weird and pijbtless. Surely you would know when she walked down the Isle? Grooms seem to get by just fi E without a special colour.

Kittykat93 · 30/05/2018 13:42

It may not be a big deal to most people but I would be a bit miffed if someone wore a white dress on my wedding day. I just think it's a bit rude and there's plenty of other colours to choose from! I wouldn't care if it had other colours on it, but I'm talking about a plain white dress.

soapboxmum · 30/05/2018 14:09

Interestingly, I’d say black (as in LBD) has crossed over into the OK to wear for weddings if there is an evening party.

Last wedding (evening) I went to was awash with gorgeous little black dresses.

Cliveybaby · 30/05/2018 15:52

No...
Anything but black or white! It's very simple!

ChanklyBore · 30/05/2018 15:57

Just wear something you like. Goes for any occasion. This is how I choose an outfit for a wedding or any other party - get up, stand in front of wardrobe, decide. Leave.

How am I to know what everyone else will wear before I get there, bride or no? I wouldn’t care in the slightest.

robotcartrainhat · 30/05/2018 16:06

a guest at my wedding was wearing pretty much that exact dress.. lower cut though. I didnt mind... I was wearing a full length traditional wedding dress.. so she didnt look like the bride.... but sadly her dress was very similar to my bridesmaids dresses which were short white lace dresses....
It didnt actually annoy me but I did think it was weird of her not to have thought that it might be an issue.... Id certainly never wear plain white to a wedding... Might wear something short and white with brightly coloured bag shoes, hat and jacket... but just white, no.

The guest who wore the white dress to my wedding even had a hair thing which had small pink roses on.... which wa very similar to my bridesmaids headresses! (she could not have known what my bridesmaids had been going to wear as even I hadnt seen the headresses until a couple of days before! so just a mad coincidence)

Original poster

lastnamefirstfirstnamelast · 30/05/2018 21:13

I really like your open minded opinions, I've seen some very against it on wedding websites. Maybe its a dreaded thought before your wedding but on your day nothing else seems to matter xxx

OP posts:

MrsJacksonBrodieTheSecond · 30/05/2018 21:18

My lovely dsis had a guest at her wedding wear the exact dress that she was. Dsis was wearing an ivory version of those bridesmaids dresses that you can tie in all different ways. Guest was 3 days overdue with her 3rd baby and all she could fit into was an old bridesmaids dress she found. No one minded although guest was mortified.

Dergadgeghead · 30/05/2018 21:20

My stepmother wore white to my wedding but honestly I think it was just cluelessness rather than rudeness (though who knows? We don't get on).

I agree no black or white is still the norm - not particularly limiting, is it?

Nevth · 30/05/2018 21:30

I really don't understand this obsession with the bride being the only one wearing white. Who cares? All guests (hopefully) know who the bride is anyway!

We had some people in white, some in black at our wedding, and I didn't even notice until MIL mentioned it in passing as we were looking through photos afterwards. Does it really matter?

Belindabauer · 31/05/2018 08:08

That dress looks very wedding like to me.
With the trend for lace everywhere in wedding dresses now I would say don't wear it.

GreenTulips · 31/05/2018 08:11

A lot of young women maybe wouldn't realise they had broken a code

I blame child free weddings

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