If you got married nearly 30 years ago .......

[SubtitlesOn]

Did you provide anything like toys or a separate play room with seating for adults for them to use during the reception?

Or did the parents bring their own things to entertain their own children, like story books or colouring?

Or did the children spend the time talking to the other children/adults iyswim?

I am just curious what happened to children at weddings 30 +++ years ago

I realise nowadays children would probably be given iPad or phone to keep them quiet - the same as in restaurants the children don't sit and talk to the adults but wondered about at weddings - is it expected now for the bride/groom to provide the entertainment?

In the 1980s I went to a wedding as a teenager, and there was a room set aside showing videos for children. Unfortunately the fil showing was “The Meaning of Life” which was not that appropriate for most of the audience, although we lapped it up!

"Every sperm is sacred ........"

Exactly!!

More recently (but not that recent), i’ve been to a wedding with a crèche (11 years ago) and one where the venue was chosen because it was next to a playground and each child’s place setting had a small age appropriate toy/craft and a lunch bag of food waiting for them.

Children were invited to our wedding, but none came!

The only kids we had were our bridesmaids and their siblings. No idea what they did tbh but no separate room or entertainment. Took ours to one about 15 years ago and they provided goodie bags for the kids with age appropriate toys and puzzles. Not many other kids there though.

Watching with interest as I’ve got my wedding booked with 10 kids aged 18 months up to 12 years coming and don’t know whether to bother putting anything out at their places to ‘entertain’ them; at best it’d be puzzle books and crayons/bubbles (not really suitable/interesting for any over 7 probably!). I’m sure it won’t compare to tablets and computer games, at the same time I’d be annoyed if the were all sat there on devices - but see this all the time anywhere else I go where kids are. Don’t want them to be bored though - appreciate wedding celebrations aren’t always as enjoyable when you’re a kid.

I was a flower girl at a wedding 30 years ago, when I was 6. I sat between my parents for the meal, don't recall having anything to amuse me (do recall being utterly ravenous, and how good the soup and buttered bread tasted!) There were some games of musical chairs during the reception but apart from that I just bounced around the room being given.momey for Coke by drunk relatives.

I was as sick as a dog on the drive home the next day

I got married in 1981. My niece was just short of 2 years old at the time and it never occurred to me to lay anything special on for her. I knew nothing about children back then and just assumed (correctly in this case) that the parents would be in charge of their children. We had other children aged between 4 and 6 there as well, but, again they were being looked after by their parents.

The food part was a very informal buffet so it didn't matter if they wanted to run around anyway.

My memory of attending weddings at that age was sitting with my parents, nothing to entertain me, apart from one wedding with huge extended family and a kids table with about twenty of us on it in a corner out of the way. That was fun.

At our wedding, we had two 8 year old page boys and six year old flower girls and nothing special to amuse them- they hung out with their parents and danced when there was dancing, so not v different.

we got married in the late 70's and had an entertainer for the children during the speeches but mostly they just played, danced and enjoyed themselves - we had a fairly low-key wedding

I personally think it is the parents responsibility to think about their own children rather than the bride/groom

show the 'meaning of life'. you cant go wrong...

that is brilliant!!!

Not sure about 30yrs ago, but we will have about 20 kids ranging from 2-10yrs. We will have childcare hired in and a room set up for them. This is a requirement in the T&Cs also

Mummyme87 sorry please could you explain the T&C?

Do you mean to hold a wedding reception in a hotel you must provide this for the children?

Is it part of the package they provide?

Is this in UK?

Is it compulsory for the children to go into the room or can they stay with their parents or grandparents or cousins or whoever and be part of the celebrations?

25 years ago the only baby in the family was my nephew aged 1. he came to the church after the ceremony and we had a photo with him (only wedding photo that has ever been displayed in our house) and then he went off with the babysitter and my sister and BIL had a blast and stayed in the hotel - first time overnight without the nephew.

My husbands youngest brothers were about 11 and 13 at the time - they danced all night. At the next wedding the 13 year old - now 15 - got drunk on shots and learned a valuable lesson about sticking to beer.

How can it be part of any venue’s terms that you must hire in childcare?

We only had a handful of children at our wedding 30 odd years ago. It never occurred to me to provide entertainment for them, it was the responsibility of their parents.

Babies were passed around for a cuddle until they fell asleep and were under the table. Toddlers danced until they fell asleep across two chairs.

We only had a handful of children at our wedding 30 odd years ago. It never occurred to me to provide entertainment for them, it was the responsibility of their parents.

Me too. And like a PP, I was almost completely ignorant about small children. Come to think, I'm not sure I knew there would be any there, DM did the invitations. we'd said who to invite in terms of friends and adult family, I didn't even think about whether there would be kids in tow.

I was married a bit over 30 years ago and attended many weddings during the 70s/80s both before and after my DC were born.

I don't recall childcare or entertainment being provided by the bride/groom in any form at any of them. I do recall at times a cousin or niece being paid bribed by the parents to watch their children. I also recall a few specifically requested child-free weddings but it wasn't a common thing.

I know I felt it my responsibility to keep my two DSs entertained quietly if they attended. If it wasn't a 'family wedding' normally my parents or iLs kept them for us. And by and large most children seemed to behave well in the church and reception. I only recall one wedding where a crying child was rushed out.

I'll also venture that most parents left their children with parents/sitters for other than family weddings. There was much less "my DC MUST be included!!!" mindset. I think many of us viewed friends' weddings as an excuse for a 'couple's evening'.

But I think weddings were much simpler and much less 'drawn out' than now. They weren't the 'all day/all night extravaganzas' that exhaust children (and adults). And a 'destination' wedding meant a trip to Reno or Vegas. Not Bali or Maui!

We got married 20 years ago and we didn’t provide any entertainment for children at all. And one of the kids at the wedding was ours!

Why do kids need to be entertained or babysat at a wedding? If the ceremony is overly long, just take them out of the church for a few moments. Ditto if they get bored during speeches.

The rest of the time they’ll either be eating, dancing or playing around outside while photos are taken. I can’t recall children being a problem at any wedding i’ve been to, apart from the occasional little one getting bored or tired in church, which is normal.

I seem to vaguely recollect as a kid that older kids would be in charge of little ones, usually some responsible older girl whose job it was to keep an eye on the other kids. No need for a formal babysitter or childcare. Such an odd concept. It’s a party, for goodness sake!

subtitleson yes in the UK, a Hampshire venue. It’s on their T&Cs that if you have more than 10 children under 8, you provide a designated person to supervise a space created for children. So they have a small room where you can set up for kids to play, they don’t provide the entertainment, just the room (it’s in a house with exclusive use). Obviously if it’s dry and warm enough they will take them outside. We were planning on an Easter egg hunt for them as it will be Easter weekend. They can still be in the wedding etc but it’s to avoid a lot of kids running riot when boredom kicks in. We were going to hire on nannies anyway as we are having about 20 children ranging from mainly 2-10, two of which are our own whonwill be 2 and 5

I was married about 30 years ago in the US. We had children at our wedding ranging in age from about 5 to mid-teens. We did not have anything especially planned for the children. They sat with their parents at the reception and joined in the dancing. We expected their parents to look after them, which is exactly what happened.

Married 26 years ago, nothing provided for the kids but the DJ kept them entertained with games for the first hour, till the grown ups were pissed enough ready to dance.

I've also attended many weddings through the years with our children, and I have never been to one where separate arrangements have been made for children.