Wedding planning on my own

[Helpmeplan]

H2b is a chef. Split shifts. 60+ hour weeks. Weekends the whole shebang. We both want to get married after 24 years together, but I am having to organise everything. This is fine. No problems. We have agreed a rough outline, but I need to make it happen!

Its not until Oct 2019, but we have a lot on this year and next so I need to feel prepared.

So far I have:

1. Booked Registry Office
2. Bought dress
3. Arranged flowers
4. Arranged cake
5. Had invites printed up

Need to:

Arrange restaurant or catering - too early probably

Arrange transport - also too early

Arrange photographer - too early?

I probably need a sanity check at some point. I don't want to stress h2b out as he's been amazing the last 24 years and without doubt is the most amazing man for me.

Book your photographer sooner rather than later, most will be taking bookings now for next year.

Same with restaurant and catering, to get what you want you probably need to start looking now (ideas of prices, what they offer etc), with a view to booking in next few months.

Transport, unless you need a bus to take all guests from one venue to another then that isn’t so urgent and can be done closer to time.

Do you have a venue for the reception? That would be top of the list to arrange now (if not already).

Tbf only going to be 12 of us (very small intimate wedding) and I'm thinking of a restaurant or home for a hot buffet.

Run down is

3pm wedding
3.30pm - 4.30pm photos
Drive back
5pm early dinner in restaurant/hot buffet at home
Then bubbly and cake.

We hate being centre of attention, and are only getting married for inheritance tax purposes and because we still love the bones of each other!

Invite list, people
Catering, reception venue
Honeymoon
Readings at the register office
Transport for you
Transport guests
Suggested places to stay for guests
Photographer
His outfit
Best man, best woman
Speeches if you want them
Hen / Stag nights
Favours, if you're having them
Think about timings, so if you're getting married at 2, then what? Food? What about the evening?

Ah, 12 of you, some of that still might apply

And book to get wills re written especially if you have children

Thanks Rightmove. Our wills are already done, including the getting married clause. Life cover in place. Honeymoon is more a pre wedding holiday in Tunisia. Guests are all local so will be staying at home.

Just his outfit I think and wtf to do with catering, which is ironic given I'm surrounded by chefs

On on a separate note we really do not want gifts. Is it rude to just ask people to bring a bottle or dish?

Not too early for photographers. Get that done soon.

Your wedding sounds lovely.

Thanks Thistle. We weren't ever going to but I was very ill recently and nearly died which makes you revaluate. We are still friends with most that we grew up with but don't really want the expense, let alone the embarrasment of a big do.

I would see if you can get a restaurant or pub with a private room that you can use for your wedding breakfast. Then you can have some privacy and decorate the room with balloons or confetti etc if you want. If you do any kind of meal at home then even if you get everyone to bring a dish, someone will have to do the washing up.

For 12 people you will have no problem finding somewhere, especially since you’ve got a while to plan yet.

It sounds lovely by the way.

Tokyo that is a good point. Buggered if I want to be doing washing up 😂

Yes, you won’t want to be doing any chores on the day.

My OH and I are having two weddings, the legal bit just like yours (which we did two months ago) and a big church ceremony and party later in the year. (Church weddings have no legal effect where I live so you have to do the legal part first.)

Even though we did something really simple, we didn’t want to do anything boring or everyday that weekend - we wanted it to just be about getting married. I think it will be even more like that for you because you’re only doing it once.

Definitely try and find somewhere with a private function room you can use. We have done this for lots of family birthdays and events etc and it makes a bit difference. Lots of pubs and restaurants will have a space like that where you can be private and decorate it however you want for a special event.

Agree with pps op. Get that photographer booked now and I'd also find transport and put a deposit down too if I were you.

Don't forget to give notice too. Not sure if you mentioned that as being on your list.

I just got married and had very similar to you , an afternoon wedding with few guests then a restaurant meal. I hope you have an amazing day

Thanks. Can't give notice just yet but I've set a reminder to boom it because meningitis has screwed with my memory!

It doesn't sound as though you're having a band or DJ, but if you are, get that sorted- they book up fast. Also your hairdresser.