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Original poster

Help me choose a date.

16 replies

Laineymc7 · 15/02/2018 17:46

DP and I are getting married next summer. Date booked was a bank holiday weekend. This is nice for people travelling etc. We have booked and paid deposit for this date but would be able to move it to a week or two earlier.

Reasons to stick - auspicious date for us the other one is not. It’s a bank holiday so suits people. It’s already booked. Pain to change things.

Reasons to move date - it’s a small wedding and a few important people can’t make it. We would always remember this. Also we cannot get photographer we want for date booked but can for two weeks earlier. Everything is available for this date that we want.

Help what would you do. Stick with date and accept some people can’t make it. Or change it.

Thank you

OP posts:

bananasandwicheseveryday · 15/02/2018 18:06

I think it depends on how important these guests are to you and whether a change would affect other potential guests. I will say, though, if these guests were so important to you, why didn't you check with them first?

EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic · 15/02/2018 18:11

Totally agree, it all depends on how much you want those guests and that particular photographer.

Original poster

Laineymc7 · 15/02/2018 19:05

The main thing stopping me changing it is worrying about the other dates not being lucky or auspicious one is a clash. I’m probably being silly.

OP posts:

EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic · 15/02/2018 19:30

Do lucky dates mean a lot to you? Could you change the date to a day when these guests could come, you could have your photographer and it be an auspicious?

The other thing you’ll probably need to think about is if Amy of your guests have booked leave from work or travel tickets.

Original poster

Laineymc7 · 15/02/2018 20:31

We haven’t sent any save the dates or anything so no one has booked any tickets/leave etc. I am a little superstitious but I guess I shouldn’t be.

OP posts:

UniversalTruth · 15/02/2018 20:35

I completely thought this thread would be helping you choose who should accompany you to a wedding

I think I would move it if the people were important enough. And I'd take your DP

Original poster

Laineymc7 · 15/02/2018 23:00

😂 I think I will take my dp as my date for this one. X

OP posts:

Cliveybaby · 16/02/2018 08:16

I wanted some time between November and February, so we asked our "A list" if there were any dates they couldn't do. A close family member in the army ruled out all but three dates!
Our "A list" were the people who definitely had to be there, as in, if they couldn't make it we'd change it.
I think having the people you love there is more important than a nice date, but that's just me!

giraffesatthezoo · 16/02/2018 08:34

The date doesn't matter, the people do. If they're close, then go with the date change. But do accept there's always someone who can't make it.

Scribblegirl · 16/02/2018 08:39

I would absolutely move dates to accommodate important people if they were either set of parents or siblings but that's just us. Would very possibly consider respective best mates if there was no cost or hassle implications aside from rearranging.

Your wedding anniversary will become a lucky date for you whenever you have it, so unless it will really worry you I'd discount that issue

thecatsthecats · 16/02/2018 09:04

My fiance and I would have liked to set our wedding date for our existing anniversary, but there were no good venues, and as it turns out, my sister would have had anything between a days old or four week old baby at the time. Go with the date not the people.

(Also, please ignore this is you want to, but I actually DON'T think weddings or other events on bank holidays are that considerate and helpful to guests. I can handle travel in a normal weekend, or CHOOSE to use holiday to extend it if I want. Using up a bank holiday for a wedding would feel like a waste to me.)

SoozC · 25/02/2018 09:55

I didn't choose two dates for our wedding last year as one bridesmaid couldn't make one and another would have been about 37weeks pregnant for the other. So I chose a third date as I couldn't imagine getting married without them. As it was, another bridesmaid ended up being hospitalised a week before our wedding so wasn't there. But that was out of my control.
Choose a date when people can be there. You'll probably end up regretting it otherwise.

Original poster

Laineymc7 · 02/03/2018 14:32

Thanks everyone. We changed the date and are now creating our save the dates. It was a pain but everyone was happy to change. All our fav people can now come. Xx

OP posts:

Ginger1982 · 02/03/2018 14:57

When we got engaged, we picked a date, told everyone important, booked venues and key things like photographer. Then found out DH's uncle already had a wedding that day. MIL said it didn't matter but we could tell it did so we changed it just to accommodate him and luckily everyone could still come. I'm glad we did change in the end but the thought was stressful!

Original poster

Laineymc7 · 02/03/2018 15:09

Ginger you are right. The thought was more stressful than the doing. Glad we did too.

OP posts:

IHeartHoumous · 03/03/2018 11:39

Good point about Bank Holidays - lots of people go for them as wedding weekends as they think it'll be easier on guests (i.e. if they work Mon-Fri and get Bank Hol Monday off anyway) but travel and accommodation are often more expensive and more manic.

By the other dates 'not being lucky' do you mean in a sense of suppliers already being booked; or in a superstitious sense?? If it's the latter, the dates I refused to ever book my wedding for were: Friday 13th and my ex's birthday!

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