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Proposal trouble

3 replies

Katietoms · 20/11/2017 18:48

I have been with my partner for a number of years. We live together and are in a very happy relationship. When we met originally we were both anti marriage. However over the last few years I have changed my mind and told my parter that I did want to get married after all, during this chat I was told that he didn’t feel the same way. He said he was unsure if he believed in marriage, this is almost certainly due to his dad walking out on him when he was about 3.

I felt very hurt and rejected by this discussion. We are still very strong as a couple and are best friends but obviously that is upsetting to hear.

Reciently however, my partner has said that he has been thinking a lot about marriage and that he intends to propose to me one day. The problem is that by being rejected the first time I now feel as though any proposal would be totally contrived and forced. I have told my partner this and that I don’t want him to do this as I would not accept we’re he to propose. I suppose I’m on here asking you if I am being stupid to not give him he benefit of the doubt or do you agree that it’s not as special now as I feel as though I’ve twisted his arm. Xxx

OP posts:
Gizlotsmum · 20/11/2017 18:50

How long has passed since the first discussion? Maybe he has changed his mind like you did? Maybe he wants to make you happy? Are either of those bad reasons? You could be cutting your nose off to spite your face.

PaperdollCartoon · 20/11/2017 18:51

You changed your mind on marriage and talked to him about your feelings, over time he’s also changed his mind on marriage. I assume you know him well enough to trust his motivations? You now both want the same thing, there’s no problem here! Get married and be happy!

YearOfYouRemember · 02/01/2018 20:01

Well that's a bit silly. You will say no if he proposes because he's litenend to you, had a think and now wants marriage too?

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