We are having a tiny wedding of 15 guests. We decided not to elope as our parents can't travel abroad due to health and we wanted them there at least. We did however decide to get married a good distance away from home (7 hour car ride) - but not so far our parents couldn't come. We were always on a very tight budget, and we made this clear so that no one got their expectations up.
What we have done is invited our immediate family - my mum, his parents, my gran, and 2 siblings each. I also invited my two friends, and OH invited his four best friends. The last guest is our son.
Now each of us has one friend who is angry with us. My friend repeatedly brought up the 'plus one' situation. At the time she had been with her other half for 3 months. Now it's been just over a year, but we still haven't been introduced to him and she has finally declined our invitation after rarely speaking to us for 6 months. The few times she had spoken to us, it was over Facebook, and the main thing she talked about was that she 'definitely wouldn't miss the wedding for the world'. The whole time she avoided giving any solid confirmation she was coming. She was meant to be a bridesmaid but she wouldn't commit to a dress as she hoped to lose weight first. She wouldn't book her hotel despite me warning her that prices sharply increase in the summer and its best to book early. When she finally declined the invitation, it was just after I posted the physical invite (obviously she had known for a very long time before that she would be a bridesmaid so she knew she was invited), and I'm positive it's because I had addressed the invite to her alone, and not her boyfriend too. She cited money reasons but she goes on holiday often and is always posting Facebook photos of the pop concerts, nights out, and day trips she goes off to on a weekly basis. Bear in mind we had been friends for 10 years and she was my bridesmaid. I was often the only one who was there for her during low times. Now she doesn't talk to me unless she has to. My other friend is absolutely disgusted with her and has herself not only been an emotional support but offered to pay for the wedding cake and drive us to the city where we are having the wedding. I think I would have cancelled the whole thing due to stress if it wasn't for her help and support. I feel so hurt my friend would pull out after promising she would be there as a bridesmaid that I really think that though I could pretend to forgive her I never really could feel the same about her again.
My partner's close friend replied to our RSVP with 'me and my girlfriend will be coming' . I've told my partner to speak to him but as it was me who initiated the conversation I had to say 'We'll need to talk about it, but we'll get back to you'. Now he pretty much knows we're going to say no to his girlfriend coming and is in a snit with us. It's his first serious girlfriend but we've never met her and he's been with her nearly six months which is great for him but he isn't the one who is going to have to explain to our aunts and uncles why some random girl is in the photos but we had to sit them all down and tell them they couldn't come because it's a 'small and intimate wedding'. Not even our siblings are bringing a plus one!
Surely I'm not that unreasonable to not want plus ones!