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Who buys the bridesmaid dresses?

33 replies

SpiderStardust · 11/01/2016 15:24

Do I buy them??

OP posts:
Sallyhasleftthebuilding · 11/01/2016 15:24

Yes normally

Sallyhasleftthebuilding · 11/01/2016 15:24

Although they buy shoes

RudeElf · 11/01/2016 15:27

Are you the bride?

You buy them if you are choosing them. If they get to choose their own and keep them then its more acceptable to ask them to pay. Same with shoes. You pay if you choose.

WickedWax · 11/01/2016 15:30

Are you the bride? Yes.

I bought my bridesmaids dresses, shoes, jewellery and paid for them to have their hair put up on the day.

If I hadn't paid for any of that, then I wouldn't have expected to have a say in what they chose/wore.

Arfarfanarf · 11/01/2016 15:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LucytheAustralopithecus · 11/01/2016 15:31

I've never heard of bridesmaids paying for their own this side of the Atlantic, the only place bridesmaids pay for dresses is the US- which I assume is why they all have seven bridesmaids.

However, I have heard of weddings where they've just had the bridesmaid wear a nice dress they already owned, and maybe tried to coordinate the flowers - was at one where the two bridesmaids wore coral dresses they already owned and it looked quite nice. So if cost is a serious issue you could try that?

honeysucklejasmine · 11/01/2016 15:32

Yes, the bride pays.

namechangedtoday15 · 11/01/2016 15:35

The bride.

Dress, shoes, jewellery, hair (if it's being 'done'). Everything. Any suggestion that you ask someone to be a bridesmaid and then expect them to pay is incredibly rude.

Same goes for best man and ushers.

You pay for all of it.

SavoyCabbage · 11/01/2016 15:39

The bride. And shoes and everything if you are specifying what you want them to wear.

PotteringAlong · 11/01/2016 15:40

Definitely the bride.

Cotherstone · 11/01/2016 15:42

I've had all my (3) bridesmaid dresses bought for me, as all 3 brides wanted us wearing a specific dress.

For two of them I provided my own shoes, as they didn't care what I wore so I was happy to buy a nice pair of heels that I could wear again.

Another one wanted a specific pair of shoes for us to wear, so she bought them. Though they didn't come small enough for me, or large enough for another bridesmaid, so she spent all day limping and I spent all day with a pair of socks shoved down the front of mine Hmm

One bought us a necklace to wear with the dress that was also our thank you present.

Hair and make up has always been paid for by the bride.

If you're going to put any limitations or expectations on what they are going to wear, you should pay for it. It's a close run thing even if you say they can just wear a nice green dress of their choosing, just in case green isn't their colour.

gingerboy1912 · 11/01/2016 15:45

The bride buys the dresses, bridesmaids buy the shoes and jewellery as long as they aren't ridiculously priced. That's my take on it anyway.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 11/01/2016 15:51

The bride. And shoes and hair / everything if you are specifying what you want them to wear/look disappearing up your own backside

I think in the USA the tradition is that the bridesmaids pay for the dresses if the film is anything to go by but I've never met an american bridesmaid who paid for the horror they were subjected to.

Charliej86 · 11/01/2016 19:54

I'm paying for my bridesmaids dresses, shoes, hair. But one is 17 one is 10.

SellFridges · 11/01/2016 19:57

I bought dresses, shoes, jewellery and paid for hair. I bought a separate piece of jewellery as a thank you gift.

I even sent a dress to my honorary bridesmaid in New Zealand.

I've been bridesmaid for several friends and the set up has been the same, except once we wore our own shoes as they couldn't be seen.

Shutthatdoor · 11/01/2016 20:27

The bride Wink

Mumwithdilemmas · 20/01/2016 14:25

We're paying for the works, although they've had no say. We saw what we liked bought them & showed the girls, thankfully they like the choice. Phew. X

CMOTDibbler · 20/01/2016 14:27

Bride specifies, bride pays. Bride says 'choose something you like to wear', bridesmaids pay

cbear000 · 29/01/2016 11:22

It depends where you live, my wedding involved people from all over the world. I went halves with my bridesmaids and they helped pick the dresses, although I'm sure they let me have the final say! I asked them to wear any shoes they liked that were either nude/pale, pastel or metallic, and no specifications on jewellery. I think it was fair, the girls were happy and they looked beautiful.
I really think all these wedding rules are old-hat. Do what you like, make it easy for guests and the wedding party, keep it simple and enjoy the day.

ChessieFL · 29/01/2016 11:27

Bride should pay. In my opinion it's rude to ask someone to be a bridesmaid then ask them to pay for the privilege! If you can't afford to pay, don't have bridesmaids.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 29/01/2016 11:29

Bride buys the dress. I've always worn my own shoes so that didn't come up. Bride pays for hair and make-up but I hate having my make-up done so that one didn't come up either. I am a very low maintenance bridesmaid Grin

RNBrie · 29/01/2016 11:38

If the bride is choosing or wants something new then the bride pays. And that includes shoes! If the bride says "wear something you already have" then fine. But I'd never expect someone parts with their own money to wear an outfit I've specified.

namechangedtoday15 · 29/01/2016 12:22

Doesn't matter where the bridemaids are coming from - bride pays all of it, full stop. Anything else is just rude.

IoraRua · 30/01/2016 18:05

The bride pays for anything she is specifying. If she says "wear whatever you like", then she doesn't need to.
That goes for hair, makeup, dress, shoes...everything!

AutumnLeavesArePretty · 30/01/2016 18:54

The couple pay and for it all. It shouldn't cost the bridesmaids anything.

Mine chose their own dresses and colour, they were the ones that had to wear them so it's only fair they chose.