BLW: I just can't do it!

[lalala34]

After a week of finger-food-induced terror, I have officially given up.

Whilst I have agree in principle with BLW, it's methods & all it stands for (I've read the book & everything ), I just can't get past the 'OMG he's gonna choke!!!' thing.

I didn't realise quite how stressed out I was by the whole thing until litlun slept thru lunchtime & I just thought 'Thank GOD...'

For the sake of my sanity, we're now doing a combination of AK & BLW (baby-led Karmelisation?)- litlun feeds himself, with purees, yoghurt etc rather than the dreaded vegetable sticks, sitting at the table at mealtimes with the rest of us. It's seriously messy but he certainly seems to be enjoying it! And he's getting pretty good at using a spoon.

Has anyone else done this or had similar issues? Also, does anyone else find the BLW crew to be scarily evangelical?? I almost feel that I've let him down or failed in some way

you've failed no one

the point is to keep the kid alive

mix it up, relax, do what you feel like

and then have a glass of wine

sounds fine to me!
i think one of the good things about BLW is that it does teach them to manage finger foods really well. i've seen quite a few threads on here over the years about babies not being able to manage lumps when they're eventually introduced
so i would maybe give him a few finger foods now and then- i mean, he is going to have to do it eventually so i guess i'm just saying don't fall into the trap of "finger foods are scary" and not offer him any at all

anyway, you haven't failed, or let him down so don't worry!

You haven't failed in any way whatsoever.
All babies and children are different, BLW does not suit them all.
I did BLW with ds2 because he screamed everytime he even saw a spoon and I just chucked some food on the high chair tray one day and let him crack on.
Ds1 wasn't too good with finger foods for a long time and was puree/spoon fed up until about 11 months/1 year.
It doesn't matter, as long as you offer him food, it doesn't matter what method you use. He'll get there in his own time.

You just have to do what you are both happy with.
I didn't want to BLW ds2, but that's what he was better with.

agree with all. I did BLW with DD1 but was too lazy distracted to do it hardcore - some days if she needed puree/jar of food that's what she had!! plus i had a freezer full of pureed food i was NOT going to waste!!
you don't HAVE to do one or the other... mix it up, and as laurieFC says, have a glass of wine and chill... long as your LO is happy and fed that is ALL THAT MATTERS

Don't be silly - you're doing fine. Do what you and your DS are happy and comfortable with. If you're stressed at mealtimes then he will be too. I think some children have a more sensitive gag reflex others. DS 1 would gag on anything for ages whereas DS 2 (9 mos) started with a mix of purees and finger foods and now prefers to feed himself and has hardly ever gagged.

I'd do a mix of both purees/textured foods and finger foods.

Couldn't have done BLW with DS even if I had heard of it at the time for the reason cited above- he had/ has a very sensitive gag reflex. If he so much as coughs within an hour or so of lunch he vomits. Glad I didn't know about it because that would have been another thing to stress about!
Will see with this next baby though, now my innocence has been shattered.
Do whatever you feel comfortable with and suits your baby, it's not going to suit everyone.

Thank you ladies (esp Lauriefairycake - you are wise indeed!)

The main reason I tried BLW was because litlun refuses to be spoon fed (won't entertain the idea of bottles either - he's an independent little soul!). He's quite happy to feed himself with a spoon tho, so that does away with the whole 'force-feeding' business; he's free to smear it in his hair or fling it at the dog if he prefers. I've been giving him a choice of mush too.

Common-sense tells me it's all fine but I think I've spent too much time on BLW forums, got a bit brainwashed there I think! My eldest (MUCH older than litun) was weaned pretty much entirely on jars - not ideal I know, but he survived & is not a remotely fussy eater.

Gonna be brave & let him play with the less scary finger foods once he's got the hang of it (& I've calmed down a bit ), cucumber, melon & the like. He's only 28 weeks, so there's no crazy rush to get him eating 3 course meals just yet.

"the point is to keep the kid alive"

my childcare strategy summed up quite nicely. everything else is window dressing.

Go with what feels right. My first child gagged and choked all the time (I know it's fairly normal, but it freaked me out too much), and never really got to grips with finger foods until well into his second year. I didn't push it, and was happy to offer mush for as long as he wanted it.

My second child took to eating a bit of whatever we were having as soon as we started weaning her (at about 7 mths). Don't get hung up on 'BLW' - or any gimmicky 'style' of weaning. Try stuff out, adapt it to suit your child, and above all, try not to worry. It almost always works out fine in the end, however you choose to wean.

If he is feeding himself with a spoon, that is BLW! Even The Rapley herself says you can give them pe-loaded spoons until they can load them themselves. The point is that they are in control of putting it in their mouths. They own the process and enjoy it!

My DS feeds himself everything, whether it is finger foods with his hands or yoghurt or weetabix with a spoon. I simply load up the spoon. But he feeds himself, like your LO, which is BLW.

Re-reading your post, I suppose the puree thing might mean it is not actually BLW in the way that 'Gill' would mean. As part of her point is that they learn to cope with solids.

TBH, your LO sounds like a happy little chappy with his spoon and his mush. Be aware of the need to learn to eat solid, family food, and do what you think is right. Worry not about what others say .