Slooooow weaning - please reassure me

[musicmaiden]

Hi
My DS has just turned 8 months and still isn't massively into the weaning thing. We have been doing the occasional puree with lots of finger food, usually only 2 meals a day as he hasn't seemed interested in more. In the past he has occasionally eaten a meal with relish, but lately won't eat much of anything at all and just cry or razz after a few mins - it's really demoralising

He will happily chow down on pear and plum sticks and eat some banana, and will eat a bit of Ready Brek for breakfast most days. He'll also eat yoghurt (all sweet things, you will notice!) But other meals he quite often just tosses things away or spits out whatever I offer. He seems so far behind his peers who are having 3 meals of main and dessert a day!

If anyone has had a slow weaner please post and reassure me that he will not just be on the boob at 16 years old....

If you're breastfeeding him, he's getting loads of good stuff anyway so don't worry. Some babies are slower to wean but that's normal. Try not to compare with other babies - they may not be doing other things that your DS is doing. They're all different.
Have you tried to offer chunks of soft roasted veg for example, with some butternut squash and sweet potato - both sweet so it might appeal more. Or you could mix chunks of BNsquash with chucks of pear/banana. what about avocado chunks too?
I honestly wouldn't worry - until they're one, it's more about gettign used to different textures and tastes.His milk should still be the main part of his diet.

Hey you!

My first words... Don't worry - you are doing fine with offering you LO and just trying a few things, Your DS seems far more advanced than our DS was at 8 months!!

Our DS is 13 months now and his weaning is ok, but not desirable. It does get easier and Luciemule is right until they are one, the main source should still be from their milk.

Butternut squash and sweet potato are good ones (at the moment thats all our LO seems to be able to stomach!)

trust your instincts and go with how you are feeling in reverb to how your son is reacting to certain things. It does get easier I promise even if it is a slow process. Boy's tend to do things a bit slower than girls, and every baby is different.

I used to compare ours with others LO, and it got me really down, now I just say to myself he will guide me, and I will understand when if I understand him more as an individual, because that is what he is!

I hope this helps. Also something to note is that it can take up to 15 trys of something different before you baby comes to like it!!

hi musicmaiden

i sympathise with your frustrations. my ds is just over 8 months and i feel weaning has not exactly ground to a halt but it has certainly slowed down. he got off to a flying start and was packing away all sorts of things initially but a couple of minor illnesses and a whole lot of teething put paid to that ... or perhaps the novelty of eating is wearing off!

sticks of cheddar/cheese on toast are always a winner and he LOVED the alphonse mango i gave him the other day (bloody should have done, it was a quid!!)

Can we have a slow weaning club? DS (8 1/2 months) is quite excited by food but only usually eats a couple of bites of anything. And despite the fact that I'm doing BLW which is supposed to be easy I feel that it's taking over my life!

Oh, and he rejected the extremely expensive alphonse mango but I'm not too bothered as that meant more for me.

Hello everyone

Thanks so much for your replies, I've only just seen them! Reassuring they are too.

So I did two Saint Annabel recipes yesterday in addition to our dinner, took ages.

Cod with vegetables and cheese sauce - spat out, crying when offered more.

Sweet potato, leek and pea - small amount eaten before crying.

Then offered yoghurt - whole pot consumed happily.

Sometimes I wonder why I bother! Can I just give him Ella's Kitchen Stage 1 until he leaves home?

bolognese/beef stew got a baby thumbs up (not literally although i have been trying - and failing - to teach him to do a thumbs up since he was about 2 weeks old!). i load the spoon and he grabs it; if he's liking something the spoon is thrown quickly down for a refill; if not he just chews it for ages and messes around. also pineapple chunks.

just keep trying all sorts of different things, you never know ...

Funnily enough he was given bolognese yesterday with some baby pasta shapes, it was probably not saucy enough (heavy on the beef) but was soundly rejected.

Mind you, he has a cold and is possibly teething too so that probably doesn't help...

hi musicmaiden
i understand what you are going through as i am going through the same. My Ds has just turned 9 months and will not eat any food. he just about has two teaspoons of petit filous a day and possibly a few tiny bits of banana or papaya. i have tried him lots of recipes and have realised its a waste of time as he wont eat any of it.i have tried every trick in the book since he was 5 months when HV said i should be giving him solids.And now i am struggling for different ways. i have even been to a paediatric dietician who couldnt really suggest anymore than what i had been doing but give him a high calorific formula and keep trying and encourage baby led weaning.
i do find it does take over your life and i also find i seem to feed my bin more.
we do need a slow weaners club i am all up for that.

Hello
Both my LOs seem to be slow weaners. My nearly 3yo was awful and completely refused any puree so I went straight onto BLW which was great. This time my 7mo seemed to get off to a good start with food but has barely eaten anything the last 3 days - spitting out, sucking thumb, general hysterics so I'm going to go for more of BLW I think.
It is just soooo demoralising esp when everyone else's children seem to be eating everything put in front of them.
My main problem is that because it was such a trauma I can't really remember how I got through it the first time but I'm hoping it will all come back to me....it's like a bad dream...
I did find this website really helpful last time babyledweaning.blogware.com

I definitely agree on having a slow-weaner club!

My DD will be one in just under two weeks and I'm only just trying to move her off of purees. She's been having finger food as snacks (loves ricecakes and breadsticks with philly) for a long time, but as for our food, I've only just started on that, just one meal a day but with each meal she probably only gets about 2 mouthfuls.

I'm so worried that she will start losing weight, but she's such a happy baby and has just started crawling and got her first two teeth (not that we even knew because she didn't grizzle at all!). So I'm trying not to stress about it, but it's so disheartening when her cousin who is 5 weeks older is eating everything all the time.

Oh well, here's to a new supportive club!! I'll open the wine and bring the cake - I'm fed up breadsticks!

Hello!! Thank goodness for you all... I actually feel like crying with relief...

I have been feeling like a complete failure the past few days, as my baby, who was previously very interested and excited when having her solids (started at six months, she is eight mths next week) has turned into a crying, grizzling, distressed mess at most mealtimes.

I was thrilled initially when there was no fussiness or any tears but this has changed and I don't know why. I did put it down to that one hot week we had (was that summer?!) and also DD is teething and I did wonder whether the spoon was hurting her gums.

I'm ff her as well ? she has a good appetite for her milk (I offer her milk after her lunch and dinner so she is hungry for her meals; she does have another two bottles a day, too). She was bf till 4.5 mths.

So, anyway, I am a bit concerned as she is petite, always has been, and she's dropped a little on her growth curve.

I dunno. I'm finding myself beginning to dread her mealtimes a tad, and I've dropped the breakfast feed as she eats nothing - just wants milk.

I've tried various foods ? she does prefer squash and sweet potato-based things, as well as fruit. But having said that, sometimes she won't even taste the spoon but turns her head away. I really want to avoid her associating meals with being tortured (!).

Any words of wisdom? If you fancy starting a support club, I'll bring us a massive chocolate cake and a crate of red...!!

LondonNinja - also feel like crying with relief to see I'm not alone. Also feel stressed as mealtime approaches and like its taking over the day.

MusicMaiden - dd sounds similar to yours re quantities although she is nearly 10 months.

Things she will eat: peas, cheerios , chews on toast. No cheese or yogurt.

She can sometimes manage a jar of stage 1 4-6 month puree.

Otherwise, happy, lovely, adorable.

Really worrying though, even though people tell me she'll eat when she's ready.

I'm usually ready for a wine at 4 pm...

LondonNinja ... I think that must be MY baby girl you're talking about. Exactly the same story. Nearly 8 months, started weaning brilliantly about 5 months, really keen. Got as far as lumps of diced veg and cheese sauce, omelette, cheese and mango lumps. Then, the gastro bug hit, masses of vomiting, then had to change to a lactose free formula. Since then, her milk intake is ok, but she'll only eat Ella's kitchen stage 1, and occasionally fruit purees. Oh and of course petit filou and bread sticks. It is so frustrating after she seemed to be really getting the hang of it. And of course all her little friends are wolfing down their meals, whilst my wee baby heads down towards the 9th centile curve. I'm wondering whether to just stop solids altogether for a week or so, and start from scratch. Anyone tried that?? And save me a glass of that red .... or two. Aaargh!

Ladies - we are not alone. Group hug.

My DS has been up all hours the past two nights, and wanting milk feeds at 2.30am zzzzz

Thinking of a more BLW approach despite brand new carpet I offered a little pasta bake this week - he just swept it off the table on to the floor.

Tonight he wouldn't even sit in his highchair and only ate 5 tiny spoons of puree - toast just made him cry. His bottom teeth are coming through and perhaps they are bothering him, but he seems ok most of the time.

Yep, I too wonder if I could start again from scratch!

Passes round the bottle

We're definitely in the SW club too! My 8 month old son only eats sweet and pureed things - and often not that. He's still BFing well (too well?) and seems chunky enought, so I'm hoping he'll get round to more 'proper' food in his own sweet time. I'm only feeding him 'solids' twice a day - should I be trying for 3 x?

chocbuttons - I frequently only do 2 meals a day, today my DS is napping during lunch! If he is awake I just give him finger food (toast/cheese/ricecakes etc and maybe fruit) as he doesn't seem bothered by anything bigger.

I say follow your instinct as to when/whether your DS will eat a third meal.

Just read on another thread people saying about their 8 month old happily eating stuffed pasta, meatballs and the like...

Hi ladies! Can I join?

My 8 month DS got off to a flying start but we've ground to a gentle halt... He's BF many times a day, has finger food quite happily and mashed food but not in great quantities. He's falling off his line (could be crawling making him lose weight) and isn't having big meals three times a day as I thought he would be by now.

The problem is he doesn't feed well in the day as highly distractable so makes up for it at night (yawn!!) and I was hoping solids would help.

Put him in the highchair and he grizzles/cries after a while. I'm trying to stay relaxed but it's hard when my HV tells me he should be on three good meals a day plus snacks

he's also allergic to some things (not worked out all of them yet) which might put him off - he's had a rash on his face and rubs his nose with some stuff.

Anyway, that's us!

That doesn't sound like a helpful HV, Igglybuff. I think DS started to eat a bit more a couple of weeks ago which perked me up. And it seems to have sent his poos a bit crazy(4-5 a day). Which seems a slightly dramatic reaction to what is still only e.g. a inch square bit of pitta bread and a strawberry (but a WHOLE strawberry!) at a meal. He's 9 months, btw, and still only having milk for breakfast as he doesn't like any cereals I've tried and I don't particularly want to introduce yet another bread-based meal.

LondonNinja how is your DD with finger food?

I agree, HVs can be so rubbish. Mine told me last time that I shouldn't be giving DS porridge made with cow's milk, it HAD to be formula.

ChocolateMoose - my DS will ONLY eat Readybrek. Tried Weetabix today and he spat it out with a look of utter disgust - it actually made me laugh it was so comical. No luck with any other cereal yet but really want to vary breakfast a bit. Am thinking of trying omelette in strips but am not hopeful. Or perhaps I should get my act together to make pancakes. urgh the extra washing up...

My DD who is nearly one is bit older than your DS but I have noticed that whenever she is teething she regresses to more pureed consistencies. The first teeth seem to be some of the worst (up until the molars) maybe because they are not used to the pain. Babies have sweet tastes at first(because breast milk is sweet) You can mix fruits and vegetables or fruits and meat, fish or chicken to sweeten. For example you can cook up apple with chicken and root veg or blend chicken and papaya, fish with carrots, orange and sweet veg like sweet potato and parsnips. Peas are quite easily disguised as do not have strong flavour like broccoli, or give as finger food. Cooked carrots blended with cottage cheese might go down well as creamy and sweet. Breakfast is not best meal of day for my DD either, if he likes yoghurt you can mash pear/mango/banana into plain greek/natural yoghurt it then crumble in up to half a weetabix biscuit and allow it to go a bit mushy for breakfast. Also banana (too much can constipate though i.e. more than about half a banana a day at first) and avocado mashed with few spoonfuls of yoghurt mixed in was a hit with my DD. Also if you are giving morning breast feed close to breakfast it could be he is just not hungry enough yet so don't be ruled by adult idea of breakfast time, you can move it later in the morning and see if it is more successful. My DD has breakfast 9-9.30am then snack/milk at 11am/12pm followed by nap at 12pm/1pm then lunch at 2pm ish, then snack and breast milk 4.30/5pm ish then dinner at 7pm.

PS I used to soak cut up strips of muslin in a mixture of strongly brewed peppermint and chamomile tea then freeze/chill in fridge for DD teething (now with molars sometimes only Bonjela or Calpol will do , still likes it as warm tea in beaker now!), you could try that before feeding see if numbed gums will help. Also you can make mini ice lollies by blending fruit and freezing in ice cube tray (I cut up straws into small lengths for sticks to be eaten supervised), that can help too when mouth very sore. Also frozen peas are also a favourite for sore gums.

Chocolate, I tend to give baby porridge for brekkie with grated fruit mixed in which DS likes. In the last couple of days he's started to grab handfuls of the mush and eat it off his fingers

Lunch is hit and miss as he naps anywhere between 11.30 and 1300 so never sure if I should feed before or after the nap??

Yes my HV is rubbish. She's told my friend that BF past 6m is just for the mum's benefit (I.e. Mums who BF that long are being selfish) and her DS should only feed twice a day . So every waking hour she's feeding him purees etc and weaning off boob?!

I'll climb off my pedestal now

does anyone have good ideas for non dairy food? My DS is dairy intolerant so really struggle.

Dear all of you,

Sorry I haven't been on here for a bit. It is so good to see so many of us are all in the same boat. I guess it is reassuring to know that our babies aren't one-off awkward eaters but are probably in fact just normal and different!

ChocolateMoose, my DD likes finger foods and I have introduced these before giving her her other solids, as she seems to like the element of control and I'm keen to get her to self-feed if that's what suits her. She has lunch and dinner. I dropped breakfast as I'm going to focus on the other meals first rather than entirely changing her life (because, let's face it, this is a big change for little ones who have previously only had to have milk).

Last weekend, I decided to try a bit of an extreme method but, hey, it seemed to work... I have noticed that DD is having issues with her gums so I gave her Calpol half an hour before meals. It worked. I ensured she was hungry and distracted her while the Calpol worked and, then, gave her finger foods to give her the confidence that food would not hurt her. After this, I fed her and she ate. We did this all weekend and I think it got her back on track. My aim was to break the cycle of 'baby sees bib/highchair = baby screams and doesn't even try the food'. I don't give her Calpol all the time now, but if she needs it due to gum pain, I try to coordinate it with a meal. I'm only doing this temporarily to help her to get back her enjoyment of food. Teething gel doesn't seem to have lasting effects.

She is happier now at mealtimes and looks excited when she sees me approach with her feeding paraphernalia but I am taking it a day at a time. She tends to prefer sweeter foods (I give her a mixture of my own purees, or Hipp and occasionally Ella's if desperate). I guess that at the moment the main thing is to get them to be happy with meals and feeding, rather than obsess about each and every thing they eat. It also helps me to relax (as does a glass of wine) once I know she has eaten some veg, meat and fruit, albeit in small quantities, which I am sure has an impact on her. She definitely likes to have the finger foods, though. I think it is a psychological thing that has helped a lot.

Which reminds me... I need to go out to buy some avocado!

LondonNinja - really interesting re the calpol, it had crossed my mind to do that.

After a particularly stressful tea time with a miniscule amount of food consumed, it is reassuring to come and re read the thread and see I'm not the only one.

It just feels like every other baby I see is downing everything put in front of it.