Trying to wean a tiny baby with no interest in food : (

[EddieIzzardismyhero]

I wondered if anyone could give me any advice/reassurance on weaning DS2?

DS1 was weaned at 26 weeks using BLW and took to it like a duck to water. He always had a healthy appetite for milk and this transferred to food no problem. He is now a healthy 22mth old with a good appetite and eats a wide variety of food.

DS2 couldn't be more different. He was on the 9th centile at birth and has since dropped to just below the 1st (we are awaiting a paediatric appt). He shows very little interest in milk and still rarely takes more than 120ml in a feed. He is now 26 weeks and we have started weaning. We tried with finger foods but he showed no interest at all, so we went to spoon feeding but he just spits everything out.

My question is, how important is it for me to get food into him now? And what sort of foods should we be trying? Should we go for 'baby foods'/purees or just mash up what we're having?

I'm totally at a loss because DS1 was so easy to wean and this is all a new experience! I wouldn't be worried except he is soooo tiny and I don't want him losing any more weight.

He has just started crawling too so will be burning up even more calories!

Sorry for long post. Hope someone can share their experience and put my mind at rest .

Is he having lots of milk? Is he breastfed?

My DD (also slow weight gain - born 90th, dropped to 9th) wasn't interested in weaning at 6 months. I pointlessly persisted with cursory bit of baby rice and purees even though I just felt she wasn't ready.

Then around 7 months she got into it and I was able to give her proper food and she'd have a little bit, so did more BLW. But really she didn't eat much until very recently (she just turned 2) but drank lots of milk.

He's ff and drinks v little . It's a struggle to get him to feed much at all during the day (always something more interesting to do!), he's slightly better at night.

Did her lack of solids affect her weight gain/loss? DS2 is so so small (13lbs) and I'm really worried he'll start losing weight rapidly if we don't get weaning right.

Anyone?

No, her lack of solids didn't really seem to affect her weight gain. She continued to gain slowly and get most of her food in milk form. She was breastfed and I was never worried about her not having enough of that, although she wasn't a milk monster or anything.

Sorry, I know how worrying it is and I'm really no expert at all on weaning

Thank you for replying skidoodly, maybe we just need to keep going with milk, but I don't know whether we're going to affect his eating in the long term if we don't crack on with weaning.

I just worry so much about him being so small and bottle feeding him is stressful cos he just doesn't want it half the time.

We thought the weaning would help!

I can't see how you could affect his eating long term by not persisting with weaning when he is not interested. It would seem to me that you are much more likely to put him off food by trying to feed him when he doesn't want to eat.

This is completely my own feelings/prejudices/intuitions/irrational notions talking, but it seems to me that the best thing you can do for your child with regard to food is to not get too worked up about it and make it into a massive issue.

If anyone comes along with better advice, please take it, but I think if I were in your position (while waiting for the paed appointment) I would just keep offering him a variety of things (some purees, some finger foods, some bits of whatever you're having) and if he's not interested just leave it.

I didn't ff dd at all (just gave CM a box of formula, so she did all the technical business) so I don't know what to tell you about that, really. I can certainly see why you are worried if you don't think he's getting enough milk either. And you can know that with formula for definite I think? There's a guide amount they should be having?

I thought there could be problems with children eating lumpy food if not introduced early enough?

There is a guide amount for ff and he is eating the amount usually given to a baby half his age .

Thank you for answering anyway, I will keep going.

Not sure why no one else is responding - have I said something wrong?!

I know that they say that food is for fun until they're one and that milk is far more important. I wouldn't worry about the food at this stage - if he is pushing food back out with his tongue it suggests that he's not quite ready. I think that the "lumpy food" thing is a myth.

I would probably try to up his milk intake - there's far more calories in milk than veggie and fruit purees as Skidoody said perhaps its best to offer the finger foods, let him explore them but try not to worry about what of it he is eating.

I don't really know much about formula but is there a higher calorie version of it?

Thanks Jacanne, he is pushing food back out so maybe we'll just hold off for another few weeks.

I don't think there is a higher calorie formula but could be wrong? I know there is one for 'hungrier babies' but that fills them up on less so definitely don't want that!

We offer him milk as often as we can but he just isn't interested and we can't force him to drink/eat so really don't know what to do .

Eddie - my DS1 was more of a milk fan than a food fan. He would happily drink milk but wasnt interested in food much (and only really liked smooth food) - but that changed as he neared 2 and got more interested in food than milk. DS2 isnt much of a milk monster (likes bfs, hates formula) but eats solids well. Each child is different but I know it must be worrying when your child is already under paed referral for weight concerns.

Just keep doing what you're doing - offer milk first at usual times, offer solids (let your DS2 explore them). If your DS1 is sat up at the table for meals, sit DS2 up there too and let him play with foods. Some might even make it into his mouth. If he's pushing food out, maybe he's not ready for solids yet. Try again in a few weeks time with spoon feeding but let him play with steamed veg, toast fingers etc in the meantime. Good luck.

Hi Eddie,
My DD was very small like your DS (under bottom centile at one stage) - she has never been very into milk - breast or otherwise and never got to anywhere near the 'guideline' amounts when we started giving her bottles at about 3 months. She did take to food pretty well though and started to put on weight much better after starting on solids (majority finger foods)

I was surprised by this after reading so much about milk being higher in calories etc etc. but I suppose if they aren't having much then they aren't getting so many calories IYSWIM.

You say your DS is crawling now? He sounds like he has plenty of energy - obviously just a small appetite . I know what a worry it is but I would carry on just giving him finger foods when you are eating and perhaps give him a picnic on the floor or something (I found that when DD started crawling she didn't like sitting still in a highchair for too long)

You can get a high calorie milk - my friends DD has it because she has been quite poorly but it's prescription only - perhaps you can ask the paed about it?

The main thing is not to stress (I know that's far easier said than done). He sounds absolutely fine developmentally so I'm sure the eating will come soon.

DD was always a tiny baby (followed just under the very bottom line on the chart until she was way past a year). She was EBF so I don't know how much milk she was taking, but despite being tiny she was always happy, active and slept really well. Does your DS seem hungry? He may just be little - some of them are.

HV insisted on sending us to paed appointments, hoping, and a dietician at the hospital told us to push high calorie stuff as soon as we started weaning. Smoothly mashed cauli/brocolli cheese, mashed potatoes with cream and butter, that sort of thing.

She ate and ate and ate...and at 2.2 is still a dainty little thing. So unless you are genuinely concerned that your DS isn't thriving, please don't worry too much.

Paed appointment will hopefully put your mind at rest.

Thanks guys - I know lots of babies are tiny (otherwise the weight charts would be very different) but it's not usual for our family which is why the GP is concerned. I'm 5'9'', dh is 6' and neither of us are exactly slightly built. DS1 was always on the 75th centile or above so I suppose that worries us too (i.e. that they're so different, not that DS is one the 75th!).

I will ask about the higher calorie milk.

I will also try not to stress and just let him play with the food - we have tried putting things in front of him but he doesn't even pick them up!

Strange child!