Heeeeelp!!! Exciting weaning journey going nowhere except the loony bin

[pollyjw]

Food has taken over my life....thinking about what to try, thinking about how to make mealtimes different and fun,shopping for it, preparing it, freezing it, attempting to feed it, clearing it up..... hell i'm even writing on the internet about it!

My DS, 9 months, not prem, healthy and happy in all other respects just doesn't get food at all. And after 3 months of trying I'm wondering whether to just give it a rest for a while or will that make it harder to pick up again at a later date? Nobody wants a fussy eater.

He will pick up a play with things like breadsticks, rice cakes, corn snacks etc and they do go in his mouth, but mostly end up coming back out again. Fruit and veg sticks are definately suspicious, as is anything on a spoon (hand pushes it away, lips pursed, turns head away, starts to cry). If i can convince him that what's on the spoon is yoghurt i might get a few spoonfuls down him, as long as i don't try the "mix the other food with yoghurt trick"!

I try to keep mealtimes relaxed and happy experiences - i'm an expert giggle-generator now - but even so the mood soon changes once the spoon is moved towards his mouth.

The health visitor said he might be filling up on milk and suggested we cut down the breastfeeds, but after four days of that i just got a grumpy hungry baby who didn't trust mummy any more!

I have to say "just for fun till they're one" has kept me sane and I suppose i'm not really concerned about him nutritionally - he's still having at least five breastfeeds a day and vitamin a,c & d. My issue is with the distinct lack of any progress.

What would happen if I just stopped solids completely?

Is breastfeeding hindering the weaning process?

Thanks for reading, sorry about long post, I know most people on here have their own issues to deal with too so I do appreciate any answers even if just to tell me to get a grip and get on with it like mummies everywhere have to!

Hi Polly

You sound like you are having a tough time! I have a 10 & half month old who had days when she wouldn't eat and just threw food about.
All I did was keep offering a range of foods and textures and she got it eventually.
I really found lots of help and support on here: www.babyledweaning.com. There are loads of members with good advice & information, also incredibly supportive.

Take a look and say hi.

HTH

I was going to pop in and post the www.babyledweaning.com site too. I am only just starting, but by no means an authority - by my dd didn't want a spoon put in her mouth (she'll do it herself) by someone else either and so it was BLW for us. It really is meant to be fun. Good luck.

Thanks both of you for your replies. I haven't seen that other website you both mentioned yet so I'm gonna go and have a look.

Good luck with your own weaning adventures!

P x

My DS was like this. He still doesn't eat a lot at 16 months - and is still breastfed alongside that. I was questioned on this that perhaps the breastfeeding was hindering his eating, but a) breastfeeding provides a lot of vitamins and nutrients anyway, b) DS is not filled up by breastfeeding any more. If I skip dinner (e.g. because he is very tired) and just breastfeed him, he wakes in the night and will not go back to sleep until I bring him downstairs for a yoghurt or something (after which he does sleep), and c) I don't think I could cut down on his breastfeeding even if I tried! They will go at their own pace, unless your instinct tells you there is something wrong then go with what he wants.

I would keep offering the food at mealtimes, try to keep mealtimes to a set time (this has helped loads with DS) and always offer pudding, whether he has eaten any of the main course or not. (Just try to stick to things like yoghurt or fruit for pudding rather than cakes or sweets etc) Keep breastfeeding on demand. The HVs were a bit about it all but TBH I haven't really been going in much since he had his 9 month check up. I had him weighed recently and as I said he has gained loads of weight. He is just a small eater! He will eat a few mouthfuls some nights and that is it. Certain foods he seems to like more - things like fish fingers (watch out for salt levels as the breadcrumb coating is salty) and baked beans, he will eat an entire small tin of baked beans. If he is in the mood, a bag of frozen mixed veg goes down well - no preparation for me (so I feel less sad if it does all go on the floor!) and more vitamins than "fresh" veg that has been sitting in a supermarket for days. You can get organic if that is your thing. He likes to pick out the veg he likes one at a time, so will eat all the carrots, then all the broccoli, etc. He usually leaves one kind of veg but will eat most of it most days now.

Oh and another tip - very small portions on the highchair tray. DS gets overwhelmed if I put all his dinner on his tray (or on a plate) in front of him at once - he is happy to begin with and eats a bit, but very quickly appears to get bored with it and will start pushing it around or throwing it off the sides. If I give him about three mouthfuls' worth at once, he will eat that happily, maybe spit a bit out, and ask for more.

Thanks BertieBotts. It's interesting to hear your story with your little one.

Witholding the breastfeeding for those fews days was hell for us both, went against every instinct and is not something I'd be keen to repeat. It didn't work for us anyway and your experience shows why.

Top tip about stricter mealtimes, I will try to give that a go. We're not a routine family and as such haven't tried to get DS into one, this means his naps are unredictable. I usually try to feed him shortly after he wakes, after he's come round from his nap but maybe a bit more structure would be better.

Ha ha your small portion size comment made me laugh when I think what his tray usually ends up looking like. It starts off neatly with a few pieces of something or other, then when he doesn't eat it I end up putting more and more on there till he ends up with what seems like the entire contents of the fridge/fruitbowl, probably not the most appetising presentation!

Yes that is what I was doing. I am not naturally routine minded either and only started a routine out of desparation because he started fighting and fighting and fighting sleep, but better food intake seems to be a nice side effect. It almost killed me to put it in place, but now it is established it's quite easy - I mainly structure my day around various groups etc.

But yes, I put a few things on DS' tray and he will eat some and I clear away anything spat out just with a bit of tissue/kitchen roll before I give him any more, and he seems a lot happier this way. He is a strange child and seems to like things being clean/tidy, despite ending up with most of his dinner in his hair!

DS took a long long time to get into food , it was incredibly frustrating.

I wouldn't give up, but just keep offering him a bit of what you're having. I also found if I loaded up several spoons with puree and just left him to it he would put some in his mouth. Eventually he got the idea that it tasted nice and would let me spoon it in, but each new thing we introduced it was back to square one.

I think he was picking up on me stressing out about it all and as soon as I relaxed about it he seemed to get on better.

FWIW he is a very good eater now aged 3.