BLW.....I can't bear the gagging!!

[shakespeare]

I love the BLW principle and my 7 month old daughter has taken to it with gusto, however I just can't bear the constant gagging and I'm now wondering if it really is the right way to wean a baby.

There has been a few times when my daughter has really struggled with removing the food, got panicky, cried etc and I've either had to whack her on the back and/or tip her upside down (first aid style, not just by her feet!) to remove it. It just leaves me feeling a bit shaky and dreading the next meal time.

And I just don't know if I agree with the 'at 6 months they can eat anything' theory. A stick of celery or carrot is hard enough to break down with teeth let alone without them. And it seems odd that as parents we are cautioned against possible choking hazards but are encouraged via BLW to give them bits of food that can easily be broken into perfect choke size pieces. Surely first finger food should be softer and easily broken down in the mouth to allow a baby to get used to something other than milk, then move onto the firmer finger foods afterwards?

I also don't like the 'they gag, get over it' stance. If a baby is going to gag to the point they appear frightened and/or cry and/or need assistance - no matter how quickly they forget it afterwards - could those experiences not run the risk of a baby developing negative food associations? I'm not a neurotic mum, but I'm sorry, I just can't sit there watching my daughter gag over and over again and do nothing hoping that this time she isn't really choking - its totally counterintuitive and feels almost cruel.

So all and all am feeling a bit glum about the whole BLW thing really and am ready to give up and feed her purees and breast milk until she leaves home!

How do other people feel about the gagging issue?

Well, in the case of celery and carrot, don't give them raw. We blw-d from 5 months and had not much gagging, and it always sorted itself without our intervention (and I believe in most case intervention would have made it worse)

I don't know who gave you the idea that finger foods should not be soft? Gill Rapley's book says over and over again to cook food a little bit softer than you would for yourself.

If you aren't happy doing it, then don't. I can't do BLW as DD was extremely premature, and apparently Gill Rapley says over and over than it's not suitable for very prem babies. DD has been having purees for 3 months now and loves them. We've begun moving to mashed/textured foods too now - minimal gagging (yes, a little, but nothing major). I give some finger foods too - She seems to enjoy them, as long as I hold them! Today she had a pancake cut into bits for breakfast and actually managed to feed herself some of it.

It doesn't have to be purees OR BLW, but the important thing is for you to be happy with what you're doing, as your daughter will pick up on your anxiety.

We weren't BLWed as it wasn't the done thing years ago - we all survived!

Give soft foods ie cooked carrot etc- never raw at this age.
Gagging is normal and will pass in a month or so.
If you will feel better not doing BLW, then don't- as long as you're not force-feeding her, I don't see a problem. It's a good idea though to allow them at least some finger-foods.

I thought you needed to cook the food till it was very soft at first, much more than you would for yourself. I didn't give raw celery/carrot till ds had molars and could chew properly.

Try sticking to well cooked soft veg like broccoli, roasted sweet potato/squash/parsnip, green beans, courgette, carrot etc, and things that easily dissolve and go mushy in saliva, like rice cakes/ breadsticks/ toast for the time being if it makes you feel better. Gagging is normal though and does get better after a month or two for most babies.

But if you want to give purees then do, like pp says, as long as you don't force feed her (I am sure you wouldn't!) and maybe give her a few finger foods to try out for herself. BLW works for some families and not for others, just like co sleeping or something. The vast majority of children will be eating normally by 12/18mo anyway, how you get there doesn't really matter! Just try to enjoy it, it should be fun and if that means giving puree instead then go for it! Good luck

Oh no, I'm not giving veges raw, just steamed to soft-ish, but even then, I find she just breaks the stick in two and can't chew or swallow the piece in her mouth so either spits it out (great) or gags on it. And I'm not talking about a simple one or two gags and its out - that's fine, its the repeated gagging to the point where she's not taking a breath which kinda freaks me out.

So yes I'm just making it up as I go along; soft finger foods, a little bit of mashed, loaded spoons etc. I was just feeling a little down about it all yesterday as I wasn't quite expecting the weaning process and gagging thing to be stressful.

But on the positive, my daughter is absolutely loving her food, hasn't refused one thing yet (steamed courgettes....mmmmmm), my family are amazed! Enjoy it whilst is lasts eh?

Aw, bless her! She obviously has a very sensitive gag-reflex. Not much help when it's happening though.

I felt the same as you so I gave DS very very soft finger food and also spoon fed him mush as well. I found too that some mashed things he wanted to feed himself (potato, carrots, parsnip, butternut squash). Yes it went everywhere but he was happy and so was I.

I went this route because I didn't do BLW with DD (hadn't heard of it) so couldn't quite get my head around it all.

DS is now nearly 11mths old and happily eating many many finger foods (had carrots, cheesy mash and chopped up fish fingers today).

It passes. Very soon. They learn to move food around with their tongues and they learn to spit out what they cannot swallow. Stick with it and try food that mushes up easily - avocado, ripe fruit, roasted veggies etc.

I'm having the same thing. I sit with my heart in my mouth, trying not to look anxious, as DS puts a whole cooked baby carrot in his mouth. By about 20 minutes in I generally can't take it any more, and give him some milk. He has only been doing BLW for about 10 days, however, so I'm hoping it will get better soon.

I give him porridge in the mornings (loaded spoons, etc) and he loves that. So it's tempting to just do more of the mush...

Yeah I'm exactly the same Herbaceous...trying to look very cool and do something on my laptop beside her but really spending my whole watching her with my heart in my mouth...very relaxing for all involved!

I'm doing what you said 1st, sticking with very soft, mushy finger foods that she can manage and seems to be able gag up very easily if she needs to. I'm thinking the firmer finger foods aren't such a good idea (for her) and perhaps the whole fruit such as a pear or apple, with a bite taken out might be better as she can sort of gum it rather than bite a huge chunk as she can when you give it as wedges or fingers.

I was giving her porridge on a loaded spoon as well but today she didn't want to take the spoon and wanted me to feed her. Not sure it thats a good thing or not.

Sigh, I'm actually not enjoying weaning as much as I thought I would

I agree with you Shakespeare - I don't think its very nice to experience a baby gagging that much.

I am doing a bit of a mixture really. My dd2 has pureed/mashed up caseroles and other dishes (often what we eat) that i feed her and she has a go with her own spoon alongside bits of toast, soft brocolli or (Gasp-horror!) those organix finger food things (but not hard stuff), that she feeds herself.

At 6 months I don't consider it in anyway a problem that she prefers to accept food from a spoon from you. Its a tricky skill to use a spoon effectively on her own. I expect she'll get the hang of it around 10 - 12 months.

Do it at your own pace. If you don't feel happy giving hard finger foods, as many of us don't, then don't!!