BLW: Help me to keep the faith!

[ExistentialistCat]

Been trying BLW with 6 month-old DD for a couple of weeks now. She enjoys sucking and gnawing on food (so far mainly roasted/steamed veg, fruit and bread) but very little actually goes down her throat.

I was thrown by an experience today, when I watched a friend feed her 7 month-old DD: She put small pieces of bread, fruit etc into the LO's mouth, who swallowed it all quite happily. I thought I'd give it a go with my own DD and she just loved it - had half a banana like this, kicking her legs with excitement and squeaking if I didn't keep up.

This suddenly makes me feel a bit unsure about BLW. On the other hand, I'm worried that I've completely ballsed up BLW by actively putting something in my daughter's mouth.

Help!

Not sure if this will help you keep the faith, but for what it's worth...

My DD - 6mo - is a bit like this. Not interested in actually putting the food in her mouth (or possibly not co-ordinated enough?), but will have a good chomp on a bit of pitta or cucumber or something if I hold it for her.

I think the main thing is you're not shoving puree past her gag reflex, which, for me, is what BLW is about - she's getting actual food, food that is recognisably food, food that you'd eat yourself etc and she's enjoying it. THAT, for me, is what BLW is all about. I'm sure there will be purists that disagree, mind you.

I had a crap experience today, went to see the HV for a pep talk about how they don't eat much in the first few weeks, keep the faith, food's for fun before one, she's getting everything she needs from her milk etc etc - turned out my favourite HV has left, so saw a different one who said, in no uncertain terms "she's six months, she needs to be eating food, give her purees. And an iron supplement." Came away feeling very about the whole thing, and once again started to doubt myself...

Weaning is HARD, isn't it?

I felt like this at 6 months with my DD (now 9.5 months). All I can say is do keep the faith!! It took my DD a while to catch on, but seeing her develop with her eating has been fantastic. Now she really eats a lot more. Its been a gradual increase, but only really kicked off at 8.5 months.
Some of my friends had babies eating more earlier, but my DD has gone at her own pace.
Remember, babies don't need the solids at six months. Its not a race to get the most solids into them, although I know it can feel like that!
Personally, I think putting food in your babies mouth isn't BLW (thats not to say its wrong, I just think it goes against the spirit of BLW). But I think you can help them for sure - try loaded spoons, or I do loaded baby forks with things like beef mince sauces. Or hand baby food, or hold it for them. But let baby feed themselves.
Now I am really glad I did it this way, but I remember those feelings that LO would never eat. Keep the faith, it will happen. Apparently 9-11 months is the most common time for a BLW babe to 'get it'. You're a way off that now, so be patient

Thanks for your support, VerityClinch and IslandIsla. Yes, weaning IS hard, isn't it... What appeals to me about BLW is trusting my baby to know what she needs but the control freak side of me still finds it hard to sit back and watch (and wash the floor three times a day!). It helps to remember that it's about so much more than just getting food down the baby.

Just wanted to say keep going! I started BLW my daughter at 6 months, and she really didn't eat much at all for the first six weeks - cue much sceptism from observers. But around 8 months she suddenly seemed to get it and there has been no holding her back. She's now 17 months and a brilliant little eater. She loves her food, uses cutlery quite happily (when she fancies it) and we've had no problems with fussiness, unlike the majority of other babies I know. Just try to keep relaxed, ignore the mess and leave little one to it.

Feefs1 is exactly right! My DS just turned one and packs away food like there is no tomorrow. He has no fussiness at all and a fantastic appetite which i find hard to keep up with. We did introduce loaded spoons so he could have yoghurt etc and he amazed everyone by feeding himself his own yoghurt from the pot at about 8mths. They do get there and the majority of calories still come from milk, either bm or formula, whether they have purees or not.

P.s The cleaning up does gradually get easier too, I remeber those first few months weeks where I seemed to be constantly on my knees with wipes and a spray bottle

It's hard, my BLWed DS was still 'playing' with food at 8 MO and I was starting to lose faith. However you have to see the long-term nature of this method - you're allowing your DD to learn for herself about how to manage food in her own mouth, the connection between how something looks and how it tastes, how to measure how much she wants, etc. These are all things that my DS (now 2 YO) is brilliant at - he eats pretty much anything. You have to keep coming back to why you're doing it and what your DD is doing - learning about food, not eating per se! I would definitely never put chunks of food into his mouth, it's a choking hazard. Your baby is much safer managing her own intake of food. She sounds like she may be too hungry to eat IYSWIM, perhaps if she wasn't that hungry she'd be happier to play with food without actually consuming a lot of it?

Hi - Well I'm going to counter argue (well half counter argue) - to give you a different perspective. (isn't that what MN is about?)
I don't get the black and white attitude to BLW. IMO you can easily and successfully give a combination of purees, selected hand fed bits and the classic BLW sized foods. Yes, it goes against the spirit of the hardcore approach but who is watching??
My dd enjoyed a wide variety of single ingredient purees AND florets of broc, soft cooked carrots, cauli etc etc. She is now 18mnths and amazing others with her continued love of broc florets and the like.

hope this helps - I don't agree weaning has to be hard

Just wanted to say we had a bit of a breakthrough today. Apparently all the lovingly prepared organic vegbox fruit and veg was not at all what the little one required.

At lunchtime today she lunged at, and had a good old chomp on, my burger and at teatime tonight had some cheese on toast. She gummed quite a big bit off and I took a deep breath waiting for the spitting/gagging/choking...she looked a bit worried for a moment and then opened her mouth in a huge wide smile - and the cheese on toast was nowhere to be seen. She MUST have swallowed it. And she did look very pleased with herself. Flushed with success we had a bit of a go at "loaded spoons" (with, I admit, some mush) and she even managed to get the spoon in her mouth herself (after a few waving-it-around-spattering-the-floor attempts) and licked it clean.

I feel my motivation returning and have binned the Ella's kitchen muck (I for one would not eat butternut squash, apples and prunes together, so why should she?)

Thanks, MrsJamin, it's good to be reminded of the principles of BLW, particularly that it's not actually about eating at the moment.

ProudAsPunch, have you been conspiring with my DH? That's exactly what he keeps saying. I suppose my desire to find THE answer makes me want to follow a particular approach to the letter and this may not always be a good thing.

Congratulations, VerityClinch (v intrigued by the name)! That sounds fantastic and I hope it makes up for the less-than-helpful HV.

Well, we tried a triangle of toast this morning (came across this tip on the internet - much easier for DD to hold triangle than strip!) which DD threw at the cat, who was delighted. And then all sorts of things happened and it was just milk for the rest of the day. Beef stew tomorrow!

Triangles - good idea - will try that, as the sticks of toast get all bendy and snapped very quickly! (The name is a long story... I believe there actually IS someone with this name as their actual name in Wales somewhere...but I am not her.)

Discovered ACTUAL BITS OF CARROT in the nappy today.

[SO proud emoticon]

Yay to the joy of BLW nappies!!!!!! Just wait till you start on mushrooms, or blueberries[boak].
Sadly still 2 of DS's favourites.

Chunky toast is good, as is half toasted muffins or crumpets (bit thicker than toast).
Well done girls

I too and BLW and the first few weeks and onths are tought but my LO is no gnawing on lambchips, steak, chicen drumsticks ( she loves her meat) as well as having pumpkin, carrot, brocolli, caulifouwer and she is (almost) getting the hang of self feeding with spoon for her brekkie ( porridge, ceral etc)

keepthe faith - its tough but this xmas when the inlaws saw her eating 'normal 'food the look on their faces was priceless!

yes the mess is horrendous, and more ends up on her clothes , / in her hair / ears etc. buts its dsoooo worth it!

dont lose heart - your LO will have a eureka moment soon!