Moral support needed to wait till 6 months....

[kilo]

Hi there, been reading the weaning threads obessively because i feel like i'm the only person i know who is trying to wait till 6 months to wean (and i know alot of lovely mums!)...my ds is 22 weeks and is very interested in my food, doing chewing motions ect, but my instinct tells me he's not ready yet. i'm just questioning myself because all my friends seem to be starting on the baby rice already, and the other day someone told me that waiting till 6 months can cause probs if they are teething around this time. i know i should just stick to my gut feeling but i feel a bit of pressure, like people think i'm being precious and overprotective...please remind me why it's best to wait and tell me i won't regret it...i want to try BLW too but friends and mother seem to think i'm mad - is it really alot messier than purees and spoon-feeding?? sorry if this sounds a bit whingey, maybe i am over-analysing and making a mountain out of a molehill - if so please tell me!
Thanks

I have a friend who weaned both her DS at 4.5 months as they were waking up more frequently and grabbing food from her.

I would not wean any earlier though. My DS2 is 4.5 months now and not showing any interest so I think it might be 6 months with him where as DS1 was very interested and I weaned him at 5 months. At 9 months he grabbed the spoon from my hand and stuffed in the food himself that is how hungry he was!

Re BLW I think that (and I probably am going to get loads of people telling me to shut up) it's a bit of a fad. It was not around 5 years ago when I had DS1 and I have a friend who is doing it and offered her 6 month old bits of raw apple which he nearly choked on - it just goes against the whole safety thing.

Also I have another friend who did it and her baby was so hungry he was miserable because more food went on the floor than in his mouth so she ended up doing amixture of both.

In favour of it I did puree DS1's food too much when he was still a year so he ended up not liking lumps in his food and this time round I will offer DS2 some finger foods earlier but not stuff he can choke on!

Anyway I think you should not ever be pressured into doing anything - I would always go with what your baby wants and don;t let anyone else tell you otherwise!

Hello there - my ds is 7m now. We waited till he was 6m, and we're doing blw.

Yes, it is messy, but then purees are messy too. It's so much easier just being able to feed him what we're eating, and I don't have to take anything special out with us when we're going out for the day.

I also find he doesn't have much of a problem with lumps so far. He gags sometimes, but that's part of the process of learning to eat and move things round his mouth (and being able to eat lumps is very valuable for speech development, apparently, something to do with the muscles used). I wouldn't say that's the same as nearly choking, although it can be a bit worrying the first time you see it.

Waiting and BLW is just easier I think. I did the same with my dd, who's now four yo and is a little angel with her food (not with anything else, I must add). She's comfortable with new food, no fads, no messing about, no fear of foods or textures. I'm hoping my ds will be just the same.

Like twolittlekings says though, you know your baby best, and you do what's best for you. And if that's a mix of purees and blw, then go for it.

As far as waiting is concerned, the 6 month mark is recommended by health professionals, and does seem to be backed up with the latest medical research, so that's what I'd go with.

This is a bit of an epic, isn't it. Sorry it's so long - hth!

I waited til 6 months and felt like I was the only person who did. I was fending off my mum and her jar of baby rice pudding for months! It has been worth while though, because it has been a breeze and DS has had no problems with new foods or anything. We also did BLW.

And 6 months is recommended by health professionals for all sorts of reasons.

I know how you feel. DS1 is now 17 months and I felt like the only one waiting when all my antenatal friends had started weaning at 4.5-5 months and I accidently started weaning DS1 at 24 weeks as he took a crust of toast from my plate and sucked it to death.

He has not really ever gagged and I had to listen to everyone telling me he would be choking/gagging and I would revert to purees.

My nephew is 6 weeks younger than DS1 and my SIL started weaning before me and my mum was nagging me, so I asked her to get me the BLW book for christmas and she looked at it and realised how similar it was to what she had done with my DB and DSis2 (I am the eldest of 4)

Having been out to lunch today with some of my antenatal friends DS is definitely the best eater, we had food being thrown on the floor, a LO who had to be spoon fed and a LO who wouldn't eat anything because 'it wasn't food they were used too' DS sat and ate sausage and mash from my plate and got lots of impressed looks when he speared the sausage with his fork.

What I am trying to say is DS is your son, you have to ignore what everyone else thinks you should do and do what you think is right for your son.

One of the good things about BLW in my opinion/experience is that it can help to tell you when your baby is ready for food. I started weaning DS at around 23/24 weeks (can't remember exactly ) after he grabbed my banana, bit off a piece, chewed and swallowed it....two days in a row.

I personally haven't found it any more or less messy than my friends who have gone the puree route. There is an element of embracing the mess but it's a lot of fun. If you do decide to do it, I'd advise reading up and maybe doing a baby first aid course to reassure yourself about safety aspects.

My ds was 9lb 3 at birth and has remained on the 91st percentile, so quite a big baby. Everyone told me that there was no way I would get to 6 months before weaning him. They were all so wrong, he was just not interested in food before 26 weeks. We have been weaning for the last 2 weeks and he has taken to it so well, but he does prefer to have finger foods that he can feed himself and also takes the spoon from me if I give him yoghurt etc. and puts it in his mouth.

We have kind of ended up baby led weaning by accident but I really do think that waiting until 26 weeks has made the whole thing so much easier than trying to get him to eat earlier.

Thanks so much everyone, really encouraging replies....ahedgehogisdueinmarch, good idea about asking mum to get the BLW book, think that would work well to get her on board with the whole idea! cyteen, you're so right, i guess the whole point of BLW is that its babyled, they will show you when they're ready. Ds sits on my lap during breakfast and although he watches closely, has never yet made a grab for anything.
feel much more confident about doing this together with ds when the time is right.
btw, is 6 months defined as 24 or 26 weeks? my HV was vary vague about it.

kilo, I don't want to undermine your instincts but the 6 month guideline is just that (dons hat). Why would you believe that every baby's digestive system and development grows at exactly the same rate so they are all ready for food at bang on 26 weeks and not a moment before.

DS2 was about 23/24 weeks when I started having food and he was more than ready for it. Took the spoon, could easily chew food and manipulate it in his mouth. Shouted for more.

So yes, you know your baby and should follow your instincts. Forget following the herd with the early weaners but also don't feel you have to slavishly stick to the guidelines in the leaflet.

As an aside, I think the guidelines have now changed to somewhere between 4 and 6 months, depending on your baby, which sounds far more sensible.

Also, I was very sceptical about BLW and started pureeing and spoon feeding (which I did with DS1). However DS2 (9 months) has other ideas and is impossible to spoon feed so we are doing BLW by default

i weaned my DS at 4 months on pureed foods until 7 months and my DD 2 years ago at 6months old on finger foods and chopped foods with no pureed food at all,

now they are now 5 and 2 and DS is an awful eater, really fussy, and difficult to get to eat well but DD is a perfect eater, will eat anything given to her.

not sure if this is down to the differance in weaning methods but there is a huge differance in the way they eat now,

also when DS was 7 months and we tried him with more lumpy foods he would choke alot but DD has never choked on anything.

twolittlekings - maybe your friend did not know that BLW does not mean handing a six mth old chunks of raw apple.

It's common sense.....

Of course there is a choking risk if this is a first food.

You took the words right out of my mouth, tiktok . In fact, I did BLW and DS didn't get near raw apple for quite a few months. Of course you give them safe foods to eat in safe easy to manage pieces (not little pieces that can be choked on). I would have cooked apple in the same way as I cooked veg for him.

yes,fruitsticksinyourstocking i know it is just a guideline and there's not something magical about the day they turn 6 months!good to be reminded to get a bit of perspective though (perfectionist first-timer here)...sometimes you find yourself feeling a bit paranoid when you're surrounded on the one hand by friends and rellies who think you're bonkers to wait and on the other hand, people who prophesy doom if you're even a day or two 'early' (some of the other weaning threads are a bit scary). thanks all for reassuring me

I'm waiting until 6 months too!!!! My DS is currently 23 weeks and I too feel a little like the only person who's still exclusively BFing until 6 months. He's doing really well though, still sleeping fine and seems 100% happy so I see no reason for me to wean him early.

Hoping to start BLW at Christmas (which coincides nicely with his 6 month birthday)

Hang in there - remember it's your baby so do what YOU want and feel is best for them!

Kilo- I know exactly what you mean and was tempted to start a similar thread myself until I saw yours! All my friends seem to be under the impression that the guidance is 4-6 months and are weaning bang on 17 weeks. Whenever older people see ds they ask if he's on food yet. I've even had the 'he's such a big baby' line, despite him being bang on the 50th centile! And, of course, despite size/weight being irrelevant when it comes to gut maturity

Luckily, I find that I can fend people off with saying I'm going to do BLW, as you certainly can't give a 4 month old finger foods!

The official advice changed between by dc 2 and 3. It was much harder at first pychologically for me only b/f dc3 for those extra 2 months, but goodness me the whole food thing was so not an issue! She just got the food and got on with it, none of the carefully prepared stage 1, stage 2 etc. NO faffing, no fussing.

You'll find so many people (incl on this thread!) who go down the well-I-started-baby-at-x-weeks-and-he's-fine route, but if you think about what's best for your baby, and what's easiest for you, then waiting is the only way to go!

And honestly, it has no impact on the baby sleeping through the night! (what exactly is it about baby rice that is supposed to be so good for a baby?!)

My DS is a horribly fussy eater and I didn't wean him until he was 6 months and did BLW. Just don't want you to think that BLW is a magic cure for non-fussy children

Having said that, he does love some really strong flavoured stuff (houmous, falafel, pesto, mature cheddar) so his tastebuds are quite sophisticated. And he likes toast crusts and crunching and chewing things a lot. Whether those are because of the way he was weaned I don't know.

I think I weaned him at 25 weeks when he did what cyteen's DS did - grabbed food out of my hand and shoved it in him mouth.

I was under the mistaken impression that weaning before 6 months was the exception...but I have now realised that despite the guidelines it seems to be the norm. My HV said it was would take a generation or 2 before practises changed (in a 'my mum put me on baby rice at 8 weeks and I'm fine', kind of way).

I waited till 6 months (just started!) and have no regrets - am quite happy to put my faith in the recommendations of the WHO (surely they should know what they're talking about. And all the biology teachers I know weaned at 6 months, which I think says a lot!), and I haven't read any research that suggests that weaning earlier has any benefits at all (specific medical issues aside, of course).

Plus it's actually a bit of a faff - fun, yes but the laundry piles are loading up and I'm so glad I got to enjoy taking DD out and about at 3-6 months with more of a routine to milk feeds and no requirement to redecorate public places with mush.(But I am a lazy slattern of a mummy )

We're doing largely BLW, we started with a squishy floret of broccoli and some went in!I have mashed some stuff with a fork and sometimes when i was giving DD food on my own I would'coincidentally' have something squishy for lunch to share with her (the swallowing thing is initially a little stressful at first, as they get a surprise at mouthfuls going down!)but to me it makes sense that human babies are not designed to take solids till they themselves can get them in their mouth. And I give DD loaded spoons as well as presenting the odd spoonful to her face, but I don't cajole her to swallow it, if she turns her head away I just put it down. (and ditto the safety recs, no raw apple, grapes, cherry tomatoes, olives etc. Just use your common sense).

Keep the faith and just wait....!