please tell me we are going to be ok...

[beforesunrise]

i started weaning dd, who is 7 months next week, a month ago. to begin with she was quite interested in her food, accepted everything (except apple) and all was going swimmingly. now she won't take anything, just seeing the spoon sends her bananas. she is interested in finger foods, but takes tiny tiny amounts- today she sucked on a strawberry and on a piece of broccoli from her big sister's lunch.

i know many of you will say that i should just do blw and go at her pace, but i am going back to work in 7 weeks and given that bottles are hit and miss too (she really is a boobie baby!) i am starting to freak out that she just won't be able to sustain herself while i am at work. tonight i got really down about it all, and started wondering whether i am doing something wrong (such as not sticking to a regular feeding schedule)...

Well I may not be the best person to reply, beforesunrise, as I did BLW, but I can't ignore your plea! The answer is YES YOU WILL BE FINE!

7 weeks is a long time in baby world and if she's done it once you know she'll do it again. Also, it's amazing what they'll do when they're not at home with mum! I have a friend who can't get her DS to eat vegetables, but when he's at nursery he'll eat anything they put in front of him. Guess what he gets for lunch?!

Is it possible that she's finding it hard doing bottles AND solids? If she loves the boob, she is probably loving the emotional connection and you are asking her to take 2 huge steps away from you at once... maybe just concentrate on the milk first?

Also, FWIW, tiny bits of finger foods are a great place to start. Just keep going, no pressure- she'll get it. My DS didn't eat anything major til about 9 months and not a full meal til 12.

HTH

Am sure you are not doing anything wrong! In my experience babies will eat when they are hungry and are fairly good at getting what they want/ need! A routine might help in as much as depending on what childcare you have in place for when you go back to work this can be continued (does that make sense?!!!) Also trying with the food first and finish with a milk feed, am guessing at this point you are only trying with the solids a couple of times a day?

Am not the best person to advise really as my DD is only slightly younger than yours but going through something similar.

Firstly the milk, my DD is similarly a bottle refuser but she will happily drink from a doidy cup or tommee tippiee first cup can you try yours with these? With a bit of practice over the next couple of months, you might be lucky enough to bypass the whole bottle stage.

Secondly, re the food I have no concrete advice as DD also completely refuses to take anything I try to feed her. Like the earlier posts have said 7 weeks is a long time in a baby's development so either she will start eating significant amounts feeding herself or she might take stuff from the spoon again.

My main advice is to stop panicing (easy i know) but in her new environment she will surprise you.

ok I consider myself a total expert (neurotic )
my ds was exactly the same, I have had a total battle, I own every weaning book, I know everything about nutrition. My ds is 10 mths, has only started eating in the last week.

Firast of all, don't worry that she doesn't eat anything, its normal, especially for bf babies.

The book I recommend is 'What can I feed my baby' Suzannah Olivier.

My ds turns out has a few sensitivities to food, babies know instincvely when they shouldn't eat. When I give my ds something he doesn't tolerate well he eats it the first time but then won't have anything at all for another week. I didn't try anything contraband like peanuts etc, but since last month I have cut out everythingg that could be a possible allergen, so no dairy, eggs, wheat, fish, soya, nuts, berries, corn

This has helped is gut to mature. Strawberries btw can be a sensitive food (even though they come in alot of stage 1 packaged food )

So what can she eat? Well most meat and veg. But at her age I would stick to veg and fruits.

don't mix flavours too quickly just one thing at a time so she can taste clearly, it can take twenty tastes to tell if they like /dislike something.

i know the stress for you is the going back to work, I was due back too, but this whole feeding thing sent me round the twist so I had to take more time off, is this an option for you?

HTH

I feel for you I really do, it has been exactly the same for me.

We have had a similar experience beforesunrise - DD was loving all the new tastes and textures and we were progressing from puree to mush with lumps. And all I could get into her today was a bit of Riveta and some cream cheese. Complete spoon refusal. She wasn't even interested in yoghurt.

It's happened so quickly, I'm thinking she might be teething and does not want stuff in her mouth unless it helps with the pain?

That's my current theory. Could your DD be teething?

thanks guys. i think she may be teething, and i think i need to wrok on a routine... trouble is, despite her being my second baby, i have no idea what to do... should i stagger milk and solids?

and i know strawberries were a mistake but she was soooo interested and so i gave her one. but so far she's only had veg and fruit, i haven't started meat and won't until she eats a bit more.

thanks everyone.

DS will barely touch solids if he's teething, so consider that if she's otherwise cranky, etc. He also only wanted the boob (comforting) or refused it entirely. So, they can be quite fussy when teething!

I was a bit freaked out at first about him not eating enough (doing BLW as DS doesn't like the spoon much) and once I just "let it go", everything was much less stressful.

FWIW, I also found at first that if DS was really hungry, he wouldn't eat solids b/c he was too hungry. So, I'd give him a bit of boob to take the edge off, and then he'd eat happily.

Always try solids when she is happy and alert. And that doesn't necessarily mean at "meal" times. Sit down and have a snack with her for encouragement. These are BLW hints, but I'm sure it will work for any method. It's hard to relax, I know, but she will get there. And 7 weeks will give you time to figure it out!

yes a routine is good. i offer solids at 7.30 , 11.30 and 4, so he knows when to expect food each day and hopefully work up an apetite. bf is a bit hit and miss cos he tends to feed all night, but i try do it in between so 6, 10 ish after morning nap, but sometimes also before nap at 8.45ish cos usually doesnt eat breakfast, 2.30 ish after afternoon nap and 6 pm bedtime ( then loads in night)

ok, just a quick update... i really need a bit of positive supporting noises as, much as i try, it is quite difficult to keep my cool!

i have decided on a semi-structured routine of bfeed first thing in the morning, breakfast (ah ah), bottle mid morning, lunch (ah ah), bfeed for her nap, bottle mid afternoon, dinner (ah ah), and bfeed to sleep. of course this is all wishful thinking at the mo as she'll take 2 max 3 oz of formula from the bottles and about a milligram of solids at "mealtimes". oh and yes, she still feeds 2-3 times in the night.

however i have decided to be a bit more "aggressive" on the finger food front, so today she's had toast with butter (she liked it, although of course 99% ended on the floor), some ricecakes (she's pretty good at that), some avocado and a piece of pasta (i had the phone nearby ready to call 999, but she was fine). in between bits of finger foods i still try to sponfeed her a bit, once the spoon is in she will swallow, so i know it's not the taste she's objecting to, she just doesnt want to open her mouth for the spoon.

does it sound like i am doing the right thing? i am worried that she's taking so little.... i see these babies (and dd1 was like that) who just eat mountains of food without batting an eyelid, down megabottles of milk like it was going out of fashion, and it makes me feel totally inadequate!

i really, really really, don't want to have to defer going back to wokr, i have taken almost 11 months off and i have a job they're keeping open for me and it's a bit deal....

You sound like you've kidnapped my daughter! .

She's just over 7 months too and took 4 weeks to eat anything! She has so far steadfastly refused a bottle too so you are doing better than me there!

She has started to eat more since I gave her Ella's kitchen rather than home made or other brands (they are very fruit heavy .... she seems to have inherited her mother's sweet tooth!)and since I decided to be more routiney. We now do:

7.00/7.30 BF
8.00 Breakfast
10.30 ish BF
12.00 Lunch
2.30 BF
5.00 Supper
6.15 Bedtime BF

and then a couple more feeds in the night...

She loves finger food but I didn't want to go fully down the BLW route as it sounded a bit of a faff. She gets bits from her older brother's meal (like cucumber stick, bread, toast, piece of banana) and I try to spoon a bit of puree in.

Anyway, not much help, but lots of sympathy. FWIW my DH thinks my memory is playing tricks with me when I complain thet her brother ate so much/so well at this age, and I do wonder if my expectations are too high. At the moment we get in 8-10 baby spoons in one sitting and thats classed as a good meal!

my dh says the same MarmMummy!

still, she did take bottles, no questions there... sometimes i feel like a torturer for insisting with bottles and solids...

(my post makes no sense- dd1 took bottles no questions asked. dd2 is hit and miss)