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Weaning

Find weaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Weaning forum. Use our child development calendar for more information.

Fussy eater or independent?

8 replies

Jodierin25 · 21/10/2023 20:42

My Daughter is 13 months and I’m just finding the whole offering meals/trying new things so unbelievably exhausting. I feel like I’m being driven mad by the constant struggle of it all.

She has never really been overly interested in the idea of food. Right from the start she’d show little interest in touching food let alone tasting it - unless it was purées. We have definitely come a long way from those days, but I still find she is reluctant to touch/try certain things even at 13 months. I’m not sure if this is due to fussy eating or because she’s now her own little person.

I find it so hard to cook family meals as whenever we have a meal containing meat she spits it out or doesn’t eat. Recently we have progressed with sausages, but things like chicken or fish is a big no. I have tried different ways of cooking/serving it and still no luck. Some of her favourite foods are: most fruit, pasta, cheese, eggs, humous, rice, yogurt, noodles, sweet corn, peas etc. A few people have said it’s amazing she even eats those, and that I’m worrying for nothing. I struggle with anxiety and just feel like I’m drowning in worry every single day that I’ve failed her somewhere along the line. I see my friends children of a similar age and they’ll eat anything, which stresses me out even more.

Her Dad and I both cook for a living so it is a big part of our lives. My partner works incredibly long hours so I tend to solo parent majority of the time, and I feel that’s another reason why I’m consumed with worry, as it’s mainly down to me.

I guess I’m just looking for some advice really, did anyone else have a fussy baby that became a good eater?

OP posts:
SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 22/10/2023 09:34

I think the first thing you need to address is your anxiety. It sounds as though she's happy, healthy and is eating, even though it may not be what you want her to eat. Are you generally very anxious? She will definitely be picking up on your anxiety.

One thing we did was to put something you know they'll eat on the side.

So serve a small portion of the daily meal to get but put a quartered boiled egg or done noodles on the side.

We've always had the rule that they don't have to touch the new food if they don't want to, but it stays on the plate.

How much milk is she having too and which type? If it's toddler milk the added iron can be an appetite suppressant.

Jodierin25 · 22/10/2023 11:04

My anxiety is definitely an issue but I have recently sought some help for this. I think a lot of my anxiety comes from wanting to do right by her, I feel every mum has mum guilt but mixed with my normal anxiety anyway, it’s just soul sucking.

I have recently taken to this approach (serving alongside something she enjoys) and we’re still yet to make some progress. I guess it must be difficult for her too as she’s now her own little being with likes/dislikes/opinions etc, I’d hate to be served food with no way of communicating I don’t want/like it.

She is still on toddler milk, as I had a few tins left from our monthly subscription to Kendamil after she had turned one. I am looking to make the switch asap but didn’t want to waste the unopened tins we had. That’s really helpful to know about the iron, I had never thought of this. She has 4oz in the morning (around 7am followed by breakfast at 8/8:30am) and then 5/6oz at bedtime (around 8pm).

Thank you for taking the time to write your message, it’s greatly appreciated x

OP posts:
BarbiesWorld · 22/10/2023 11:53

Anecdotally, after working with kids for the best part of 10 years before leaving, toddlers and small children can be quite funny about eating meat. I think it's a texture thing, but I definitely saw it a lot through the years and my own daughter was the same before 3.

SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 22/10/2023 12:09

She's having the right amount of milk so that's a really good thing.

Jodierin25 · 22/10/2023 14:56

Oh really, did it bother you much? Did you keep trying to offer it or did you switch to a more vegetarian approach?

OP posts:
SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 22/10/2023 15:02

I think them not liking meat is fairly normal too.

You could try things like a roast dinner and leave the meat in a strip or two that she can hold and choose to eat or not.

It doesn't really matter if she eats much meat or fish at this age, just keep offering.

Have you read French Kids Eat Everything?

Jodierin25 · 22/10/2023 15:46

No I haven’t, is it any good?

OP posts:
SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 22/10/2023 15:56

Jodierin25 · 22/10/2023 15:46

No I haven’t, is it any good?

It's worth a read at that price Wink

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